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57 M Warwick, RI

My Details

Last Online
Aug 19
5′ 7″ (1.70m)
Body Type
Mostly vegetarian
Agnosticism, but not too serious about it
Scorpio, but it doesn’t matter
Relationship Status
Relationship Type
Doesn’t have kids
English (Fluently)

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My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
(Note: Despite my age, you should imagine me as being 40-45, and I believe you'll have a better idea of how I look, as well as how much the wear and tear of life has affected me. :-) )

First, please be aware that my "handle" is meant to be provocatively fun, and not the over-confident false promise of a carnival barker. Still, I AM a stud of mammoth proportions, uh...but not literally, just in effort and willingness to please. Oh, and not really a "stud" either, in the purest sense of being a procreating machine. I have not, as yet, spawned, though others do make a sport of that also. Besides, spawning never did much for the ambitious salmon, who always dies soon after. Not me. Better to live to spawn another day.

Perhaps I've over explained here. Oh well, I've looked for something like love, but I've run out of space and time, as a physicist once might've said.
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
Looking for love, truth, and understanding, in a cruelly indifferent universe. You know-- fun stuff!
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
Sounding reasonable when I'm occasionally irrationally upset, and seeming overly passionate when I have a very logical point to make. Ah, paradox. (Then again, sometimes I'm just harmlessly irrational while venting, without there being any sensible point to make. I reserve the right to have nonsensical release!) I'm also self-deprecating.
Also, I'm pretty good at piercing through pretensions, even my own, occasional ones. This is usually most enjoyable when done good-naturedly (which it is most of the time, anyway) around a receptive friend or two, to share the amusement and bemusement. (Like watching the supposedly fastidiously authentic Mad Men for anachronistic speech. This is ridiculously easy, it turns out. Examples: 1) Last year a character described another one's rather unrevealing suicide note as being "boiler plate", a term that I doubt even the typical user [i.e., political commentator] wouldn't have used before the '90s; and, 2) Recently a character spoke of someone with a loaded schedule as having a "full plate", an expression that even in the '80s would've gotten the speaker a blank look [which it still should, I think]. Hilarious! It's the late 20th century the producers are depicting, not 16th century England. Translations into more current idiomatic developments are unnecessary. So, let them use the dated expressions of the day ["groovy", for example, for some characters], and leave the current abominations in the present.:-) Sorry, Matthew Weiner. :-) )
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
My inconspicuousness. ("Was somebody just here?" They're probably talking about me.) Really, I do tend to go unnoticed when alone, as I've learned too well how to move quietly around. But when I am noticed, people seem to think that I'm fairly good-looking, as bipeds go. Okay, they actually notice that I'm two-legged first, then might notice my boyishly middle-aged appeal. Then again, that standing upright thing IS pretty impressive.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
Trying to reacquaint and just plain acquaint myself with great fiction by Orwell, Melville, and Sarah Palin, for example, but tend to read more nonfiction. Since I read with a stuttering inner voice, I tend to enjoy fiction in movies, TV, and theatre more, but I love great words beautifully put together, and the written and the performed versions of those words both have their advantages. So, I also like movies, some TV and some sports. My musical tastes are eclectic, meaning I have no well-defined standards across the spectrum, though I do tend to retch when Country Music comes a-callin', yet I respect its authentic artists.

Oh, and I really love pizza. What a gourmet!
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
1) My dominant hand. 2) YOUR dominant hand, if I'm lucky. 3) My memory of the one time I heard Peter Gabriel's "Shock the Monkey" as he performed it in (the original?) German. 4) Can I say "your hand" again? 5) Freedom from ever having to make a list of preferences again. 6) The fact that under "My Details" here it tells me that I'm online now. (Thanks, okcupid!)
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
Humor; the meaning of life; politics; sex; and how finding the humorous absurdity in sex, politics, and religion is meaningful to me.

In that vein: I wonder why people don't give up Christianity for Lent.

Also: Would the Dalai Lama ever assist Richard Gere if there were a "Free Upstate New York" movement? (I doubt it. It amuses me when I imagine that the Dalai Lama secretly doesn't care much for Mr. Gere, and for no good reason: just simple, inexplicable dislike!) And does he get irritated when people call him the Dolly Lama? Namaste, brethren!
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
At home, sometimes remembering past misspent nights at bars. I'm happy to say that it was never my aspiration to be the world's most successful lounge lizard. Good thing.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I once had an erotic dream involving Cloris Leachman. It was both disturbing, unexpected, and surprisingly satisfying. And it was only once! (Hey, I'm not responsible for the involuntary thoughts of my unconscious, am I?!)
I’m looking for
  • Girls who like guys
  • Ages 24–58
  • Near me
  • For new friends
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
VERY IMPORTANT: Don't be too attached to my answers to the often maddening questions here. Rather, consider the humor with which many are answered, as well the sometimes lengthy explanations I added: they're essential for a proper sense of things. (To put things in perspective, there were very few questions to which I attached an "I will accept only this answer"
limitation. The details you add are what matter and clarify things.)

You have a sense of humor and low expectations. (I mean that in the best possible way. High hopes are good, though.) It also helps if you're intelligent, you think for yourself, and have a beautiful smile, especially while naked.:-)

Please, no cancer tans, or excessive tattoos (i.e., like a sailor's, or like ones on those still sleeping through their heavy metal dreams).