New! Incognito Mode. Now you can hand-select who sees you on OkCupid. That means total control of your visibility.
Find better matches with our advanced
39 • Portland, OR • Man
I’m looking for
- Ages 21–50
- Near me
- Who are single
- For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating, casual sex
- Last online
- Apr 15
- 5′ 7″ (1.70m)
- Body type
- A little extra
- Mostly anything
- Libra, and it’s fun to think about
- Graduated from university
- Science / Engineering
- Rather not say
- Strictly non-monogamous
- Doesn’t have kids, but might want them
- Likes dogs and has cats
- English (Fluently), French (Poorly), Hindi (Poorly), C++ (Okay)
I like asking lots of questions.
I am a shy extrovert. I enjoy the company of others who like to partake in long interesting conversations about anything and everything but sometimes have a hard time in really big crowds of people.
I get great joy in cooking for others with tasty, healthy, fresh, local ingredients.
I love to cuddle and snuggle.
I am interested non-violent communication, active listening, and other tools and techniques to help people
increase their emotional intelligence and better connect with each other.
I am currently working on winding down in my tech industry day job to start my own food cart. This is a huge change, going from the "security" of being employed by someone else to being fully self-employed and completely in charge of the direction my business goes. It is scary and also exciting as food is a huge passion of mine.
I am practicing polyamory and am in a completely open relationship with the amazing lotusgaze. We're married, totally in love, but completely support each other in exploring other romantic and sexual relationships, believing that our individual growth and exploration only makes our relationship stronger.
I own a home that I share with 4 other people and am working on turning into an example of environmental, social, financial, and spiritual sustainable living in an urban setting. Shared resources, permaculture, food forests, rainwater harvesting, consensus based decisions, chickens, etc.
I am working on purging and minimizing my material belongings and living a simpler life where I enjoy the beauty of day-to-day experiences instead of amassing possessions.
Exploring my spirituality. I was an militant Richard Dawkins style atheist in my twenties and have shifted over the last few years to a place of much more openness and acceptance. I find that I resonate with spirituality grounded on personal inner work and spiritual atheism far more than supernatural based spiritual practices.
Being there for my friends and loved ones with emotional support when they need it
Not getting enough sleep
Being extremely silly...
Oscillating between extreme shyness and bubbly outgoingness
I used to read a lot of sci-fi and the works that have influenced me the most are Dune, Stranger in a Strange Land, and Neverness, which unfortunately most people have never heard of in the U.S. :( These days I read a lot more non-fiction, focusing on natural technologies, sustainability, green building, personal growth, etc. I recently finished reading Wendell Berry's "A Continuous Harmony" and was blown away by his wisdom.
Movie wise, I love everything from the deeply serious to patently absurd B movie. Inspiring directors include Kurosawa, Gilliam, Wes Anderson, Richard Linklater, Christopher Nolan
Insert obligatory "I do not own a TV but get addicted watching random shows such as Firefly and True Blood on the Internet" quote here. I really like documentaries and every so often fire up Frontline or Nova on the computer.
Music wise I listen to just about anything though I prefer music I can dance with, not just passively listen to. I don't really follow music genres. If I like how it sounds, it's good enough for me.
I <3 all food from asparagus to zatar.
- Intellectual stimulation
- My bike
- Community: Lovers, friends, snuggle buddies
- Transparent and Honest communication
- Good beer
Food and cooking. I often spend my working hours daydreaming about what to cook next and about interesting flavor, texture, and aroma combinations.
Love, Sex, "Relationships." I don't like that word b/c we have relationships with every person we come in contact with and it has been co-opted to mean a very specific type of connection between two people. What exactly does my version of polyamory/openness look like down the road.? I don't really like the terms "primary" and "secondary" and at the same time I do want to build deep, meaningful, long-term connections with people.
These days I've been thinking a lot more about race and diversity as I keep noticing that I often am the only non-Caucasian in gatherings around Portland. I'm specifically wondering how to grow the sustainability movement beyond the bubble of inner PDX and the organizations that cater mostly to young Caucasians.
How do I merge my logical, scientific view of the physical world with spiritual ideas and experiences? I've recently had what I can only call a spiritual awakening of sorts and I am working on understanding what it means to be spiritual without being superstitious.
I've also started to think about gender as a social construct lately as I don't really fit into the traditional Male gender role and am fairly comfortable expressing my feminine side. Sexuality too...I list myself as "bi" but I've only played with a few men and am discovering that all physical body types are really hot and sexy to me regardless of gender and that what I like sexually is kind of all over the map and can't fit into a box.
The concept of of identity and how we define ourselves ("beer geek", " "computer geek", "introvert","foodie", etc...) and how those definitions both allow for connecting us to others and also limit us in expanding ourselves.
I'm not serious all the time and also think a lot about funky outfits (I <3 the bins), good beer, board gaming, and general silliness.
You are passionate about something you do whether it be work, a philosophy, music, comic books, a certain type of food, beer, sexuality, bikes, etc. Whatever your fancy, you like to share it with others but you do not think your "ism" is better than other people's "isms". You are interested in doing your part in changing the world in whatever way feels true to you. You are creative. You are curious about the world around you. You question yourself and are open to change and to new possibilities in your path. You can, or are at least do your best to, communicate transparently and compassionately.
You want to go an adventures by bike, or go explore the local food scene, or go to music shows, or geek out over open source software, or work in the garden, etc....
I love to meet new people I and am open to meeting friends, adventurers, cuddle buddies, casual lovers, FWBs, long-term partners in crime, etc.
If you want to be a regular lover with me in Portland you need to truly open to open relationships of all types and be willing to meet my other partner(s). I don't expect my partners to all be friends with each other but I want them to be able to accept each other and be respectful if they happen to be in the same room together.
You want to meet in real life for tea, coffee, beer, and adventures versus emailing back and forth for weeks!
Report this photo
How does this violate our Photo Rules?
Thanks! We'll look into the issue soon.
Flagging inappropriate content keeps OkCupid awesome. You're now eligible to be a flag moderator!
Connect your existing OkCupid account
Restore your account to continue meeting new people.
Reset your password
We’ll email you a link to reset it.
An email is on its way to . If you don’t see it, try checking your Spam folder.