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f3m4n0n

22 F Columbus, OH

I’m looking for

  • Everybody
  • Ages 18–99
  • Near me
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating

My Details

Last Online
Yesterday – 9:12pm
Orientation
Bisexual
Ethnicity
White
Height
5′ 0″ (1.53m)
Body Type
Overweight
Diet
Mostly anything
Smokes
Sometimes
Drinks
Rarely
Drugs
Religion
Atheism, and laughing about it
Sign
Aries
Education
Graduated from university
Job
Income
Less than $20,000
Relationship Status
Open relationship
Relationship Type
Strictly non-monogamous
Offspring
Doesn’t have kids, and doesn’t want any
Pets
Likes dogs and has cats
Speaks
English (Poorly), Spanish (Okay)

Similar Users

My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
I'm introverted, awkward, anxious, probably just a little bit autistic. passive, sarcastic. giggly, generous and affable to people that can make me feel comfortable and coax me out of my shell.
I have only a handful of close friends that I'd do just about anything for. My harem is currently accepting applications. Someone who likes to go places, do stuff, talk about things, you know.
Ladies?

I like to:
Partake.
talk to cats.
Watch the televisions.
Listen to music.
Talk about music.
Play some music (ukulele, piano, voice).
Sit, think.
Talk a little.
Partake some more.
Eat. A lot.
Chill. Yoga, meditate. Nap maybe? I'm very low-key and drama-free.

merrily merrily merrily merrily
life is but a dream.
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
i waste away the days waiting on a new age.

Teaching myself piano.
trying to score a day job. Anyone?
Climbing the trees.

Learning about the environment, urban runoff, sustainable agriculture blah blah blah. I want to be a small-time (pot) farmer.

rather mediocre ukulele covers:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a_kbH891L68
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
-screwing up first impressions. I'm hella shy around "new" people and especially around groups of people. It'll take a few hours or a few bowls before my anxiety chills the fuck out.

-providing a neutral viewpoint, justifying the actions of others and being tolerant of them even when I don't necessarily agree with them. Putting shit in perspective. Standing up for the underdog.

-being brutally honest.

-cooking, baking, etc. I do a lot of eating.

-dealing with gross shit. I like seeing people squirm.

-not giving any fucks

-saying "fuck" a lot

-explaining science-y things. I've always had a knack for biology, ecology, geology, chemistry.

-making people look like giants when they stand near me.

-being the "bong wench"

-playing songs by ear. playing pink floyd covers.

-Making fun of people. Making fun of myself.

-making you lose the game
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
"Long hair, wearing something floral and flowy.
Appears to be a human female.
Pretty stout, could be some sort of halfling?
Did she just meow at me?
5/10 would probably bang"

Seriously, I meow a lot.
Also, people have a tendency to ask me why I'm "so dressed up".
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
Picture box: SVU, Pete and Pete, anything by Mike judge, sitcoms, cartoons. I'm not picky.

Sounds waves: pink floyd, sabbath, Beatles, Zeppelin, smashing pumpkins, pixies, the animals, mamas and the papas, liz phair, garbage, hole, cardigans, blink 182, patsy cline, nancy sinatra, horse the motherfucking band, Rothschildren (my boyfriend's band). Pretty much anything that doesn't suck.

Nourishment: cow, pig, carbs, cheese. I'm a super taster. I can be a bit picky.

Books: pretty strictly non-fiction, mostly textbook-like stuff I find at thrift stores. Psychology, environment/gardening, business/econ, self-help, that sort of stuff. Last book I finished was The Prince.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
A large water pipe.
Detective Olivia Benson, SVU.
lucky pink floyd necklace.
Feline animal companion.
Tequila!
Fuzzy blankets? I have a lot of fuzzy blankets.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
food/trophic levels, weed politics, ETs, new world order, when the narwhal bacons, why nothing matters, and all the things that I forgot to do. (and all the times I had the chance to).
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
stoned and/or downing half a bottle of tequila, usually alone, netflixing it up. I'm very exciting.

breakin the law, breakin the lawww, etc.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
If I haven't made this clear already, I'm fat. 5'0", 200 pounds, size 16.

I fart on the first date.

I don't wear makeup.

I consider myself to be a gay man trapped in the body of a pretty lady.
I talk about my dick a lot (relatively).
spoiler: I don't actually have one.

Oh by the way I'm in two separate, long-term relationships with two lovely men. At my peak, I had 5 ongoing relationships. I consider myself a relationship anarchist, but basically I practice hierarchical polyamory.

I'm an ent.

Kik: 42me0w
Protip: I'm not going to cyber with you or send you nudes.
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
any of the following apply to you:

you've got something nice to combust with me

you do music-y stuff and you'd like to try doing music-y stuff with me

You want to sit around and watch law and order with me?

You like to talk (I like to listen) or you're a fan of comfortable silence.

PS: I probably won't respond to you if you're in another state, unless you're willing and able to meet. I'm lazy.
PS: I don't drive. I bike. If you're more than a few miles away from me, you'll need a car.
Edit: bike was stolen. You'll definitely need a car.

fin.