There's a monster that lives in my head, He talks to me softly...
He wants me dead...
He tells me this time.. I'll stay in control... He tells me to not
let anyone know...
He convinces me that no one cares, He whispers the pain is too much
He tells me how wonderful I will feel... He tells me he loves me,
and It's real...
He tells me not to call anyone, My heart starts racing, He tells me
It will be fun...
He tells me not to think of the past times, He tells me I can doo
this just one last time...
Who is this monster who calls me by my name...
He's waiting to start the game...
- This was one of the first poems I was given when I was in rehab,
I was in a drug treatment facility because I lost control of my
life and I desperatly needed help, This poem has really touched me
because, This is real, This is how It feels in the mind of an
addict, And I am one... I'm not trying to turn anyone away but this
is who I am, and I like who I am and If you dont, It's your loss,
you dont have to worry about me going back, I have way to much to
lose and its not worth it, I've been clean for 60+ days.
This Is the daily battle I have to fight for the rest of my life,
It sounds scary and rough, But believe me...
I'M NOT SCARED...
I will beat this without a question, but to the people that loves
me the most, I could never let you down... I’m not the selfish
David Falzone anymore... I just wanna feel accepted and loved for
who I am and I'm now coming to terms with myself and for once in my
life, I love myself. I'm looking for whatever, positive friends and
maybe find a girlfriend.
What I’m doing with my life
I'm in the process of changing everything about my life. My life
has significantly improved since I've been clean. I'm very family
oriented, my family has been there for me when i needed them the
most and the love that i have for them is unconditional. My 6 year
old daughter Is alot closer to me cause before I chose my addiction
over everything. I had to miss her 1st day of kindergarden b/c I
was in rehab. That was something i needed to miss to really see
what the hell this addiction has done to me. Rehab has
significantly changed the way i think and has had a huge impact on
my life, which is why im being so open. I'm not ashamed of who i
am, I've learned to accept things i cannot change and I hope to
meet people who are supportive and who are completly drug free,
even weed. I'm staying away from all that is bad and I hope
everyone can accept that.
I’m really good at
Problem Solving, which is why i do tech support. I like helping
people mostly, I get some satisifaction out of it espically if i
make them happy, it may sound kinda concited but when you put your
neck out there for someone to help them, It usually goes a long
way. You never know when you may need a favor from someone, thats
why its so important. Plus i liked to be liked by everone and for
people to like you as well as respect you, it maybe the qualities
that'll last a life time.
I'm also good at carrying a conversation. I can talk about
anything, Though I may not be able to relate with everone, I can
always see somthing in someones point of view. I love to talk about
politics,mostly because im disgusted and appaled on the direction
that this county is taking.
The first things people usually notice about me
People often say that I'm itimaditing which in my opinion makes no
sense, Im 5'4 with a bigger than average build ( I dont think I'm
that fat) I have been excerising and would like to meet people who
can help and encourage a healthy clean lifestyle.I know I could
stand to lose some pounds but despite that I'm a nice person and
dont just up and judge me for that..Be my friend and excerise with
me, dont hate me for it. People say I look very handsome and I'm
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Well i love to watch all kinds of movies..really no specific genre
and i think its pointless to make a list of movies. I doo download
all the latest movies and give them all a shot as long as the
quality Is good.. I dont really watch cable tv b/c im always busy
watching movies. I hate that great shows have suggestive selling
selling measures such as product placement and commercials.
As far as books go, I like self help books like the Power of
Positive Thinking. I think everone should read that book or mandate
that in school. It's really shaped the way I think, feel and act,
and has tought me whats important in life. I know tat may sound
stupid, but its 100% truth.
The six things I could never do without
1. My Recovery, If I take my will back and put my recovery second,
I'll lose everything or everyone else that i could never do
2. My personal happiness, I'm tired of hating my self and having
low self esteem, I've fixed that and my goal is to be happy as much
as i can be!!
3. My daughter
4. My Mom
5. Church, yeah I said Church, I'm very new to spirituality and It
really makes me feel good, I'm really serious to my new way of life
and hopefully god can fill the void.
6. My job, They helped me get into rehad and paid seventy thousand
dollars cause thats how much they believe in me.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Mostly about my Past, Present and Future.
I'm not gonna lie, I've had one hell of a past (like everyone
claims) but I dont blame anyone but myself as I'm the only one
responsible for my actions and the path I took. I dont mind talking
about it as, I'm not ashamed or embarassed of what i been through,
or who I am. But I'd like to know who you are before I open myself
up. I promise you wont be dissapointed!!
On a typical Friday night I am
Probably hanging out with my family getting tipsy (legally of
course). Every Friday night is different though. I could be taking
you out on a date and getting to know you. Or i could be picking up
My beautiful little girl taking her to chucky cheese or over her
grandparents house to have dinner. I family is my best friends,
alot of my so called friends did nothing good for me, only brought
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I'm a huge fan of Johnny Depp's Willy Wonka character. I dont know
why, But I'd love to be just like willy wonka with a love life that
is!! I also have a superman tattoo on my arm.
You should message me if
If you'd like to get to know me, I promise im not one of those
crazy stalker types. Im a genuine person now and I only want to be
around positive people, I've let too many people bring me down and
I'm not having that anymore. I'm 100% changed man and If you like
what you see and read. Holla @ me