I hate long walks on the beach, despise traveling and cannot stand living life to the fullest.

D.C. is all kinds of awesome and I love it here.

I work in the circus and moonlight as an actor (maybe...). When I'm not doing that, I help different national government agencies perform their essential functions more effectively--basically: public service Superman.

Really into Crossfit and generally outdoor sports.

Infectious laughter. As a rule, I obstinately, stubbornly refuse to take life too seriously. Life is simply too boring otherwise. If you are terribly uptight or preachy, we're probably not meant to be friends.

Too many books to mention... I enjoy travelogues in the vein of Robert Kaplan and, generally speaking, books about culture.

Movies also far too many to mention. I'm a Netflix addict, and generally find many nights spent enjoying a Moroccan (or Indonesian, or Sri Lankan, or what have you) film. Some of my classic favorites are films like The Lives of Others, Goodbye Lenin!, Amores Perros, Slumdog Millionaire. If it's got great laughs, then there's a high likelihood I've seen it or want you to tell me about it so I can check it out.

I enjoy cooking almost as much as I enjoy eating--which is to say, a lot! The easiest way to ingratiate yourself with me is to cook me something that will cause an oral wet dream.

Pie.

Weekend plans--entiendes?

Toss-up between loud, engaging conversation in a bar with friends, shaking my butt to nondescript music in dark, seedy setting, or lying low with a book.

A few months ago, I got kicked out of a bar for stealing birthday cake. The cake was delicious--hella worth it.

You can teach me some good dance moves.