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fauxinnocence

27 F Milwaukee, WI

My Details

Last Online
Jul 21
Orientation
Bisexual
Ethnicity
White
Height
5′ 6″ (1.68m)
Body Type
Curvy
Diet
Mostly anything
Smokes
No
Drinks
Socially
Drugs
Never
Religion
Atheism, and laughing about it
Sign
Pisces, and it’s fun to think about
Education
Graduated from university
Job
Education
Income
Less than $20,000
Relationship Status
Open relationship
Relationship Type
Strictly non-monogamous
Offspring
Doesn’t have kids, and doesn’t want any
Pets
Likes dogs and has cats
Speaks
English

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My self-summary
I'm a feminist, creative, and open minded. I'm currently in a long distance poly relationship with a man that I've been with for 7 years and a live-in poly relationship with a man I've been with for 3 years.

I identify as bisexual on here, but in "real life" I identify as queer as I don't think sex or gender only has 2 options. I really enjoy educating people about sexuality, gender, sexual health, and wellness.
I don't ever want to get married, and I won't leave my boyfriend(s) for you.

I'm kind of a busy person, so I don't have a lot of free time, but I *am* interested in meeting as many cool people as physically possible as well as networking with other poly/ feminist/ artist/ queer/ knitty/ stitchy/ dancer/ and/or creative folks. It doesn't mean I'm interested in anything more than friendship, but I do feel like the best friendships I've ever had have ended up being more eventually. So be very grateful if you're allowed in my "friend-zone" (God, I fucking hate people that use that word!). Being my friend is not lesser than being my lover. It's awesome, fun, and geeky... And that can lead to love and/or sex, lol.

I'm opinionated and strong-willed, but I'm not up in people's faces about it, so people rarely know me as that kind of person. :}

I am innocent-ish, corrupt-ish, and blasphemous.
What I’m doing with my life
Knitting as much as I can and trying to develop my geek-themed yarn dying business (Lady Purl.Etsy.com if you're intrigued). It's a niche market of course, but where else can you say, "I have Catwoman simmering on the stove, Wonder Woman hanging in the shower, and I'm winding Buffy up at the moment." ^___^

I dabble in burlesque in my free time. I created a geeky burlesque troupe and occasionally write, produce, and direct a big geeky production. It's really fun and a love it. Between big geeky shows, I'm usually performing monthly with the Moonlight Muse Burlesque troupe.

I just really got into hula hooping. Absolutely adore it (when I'm not hitting myself in the face or jugular with the hoop >.<). Trying to get good enough to do various hoop tricks. I've already noticed how it's changing my body shape and strengthening parts of my body I hardly used before.

I run the Young Milwaukee Poly group once a month at The Tool Shed (greatest business in Milwaukee), where we discuss the ins and outs of polyamory. If you're in the poly lifestyle or interested in it you're welcome to join us. It's not a dating group though, so don't come if all you're trying to get out of it is laid. I've been running the group since 2009 and it's been incredibly rewarding.
I’m really good at
knitting, laughing, chatting about randomness, listening to people that have interesting things to say, ignoring ignorant bastards that talk too much and have nothing to say.

Uhm... responding with "That's what she said!" at highly appropriate and inappropriate times.

Having a sense of humor about most everything.
The first things people usually notice about me
My long hair (black, purple, and blue at the moment) and Bettie Page bangs.

I want to say my green eyes, but usually people have to get really close to see them, and it's rare I let people get that close to my face. Because... Awkward.

The fact that I prefer writing on my hand to any kind of paper.

I smile a lot?
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Books/Authors: Chuck Palahnuik, Joss Whedon (he writes for my favorite shows EVER), The Watchman and Lost Girls by Alan Moore, all of "Transmetropolitan," "World War Z" by Max Brooks was amazing, feminist literature, Sarah Silverman is my hero, Kurt Vonnegut, Douglas Adams <3!, and lots, lots more.

Movies: Princess Bride, Fight Club, V for Vendetta, Shaun of the Dead, The Professional, Amelie, Moulin Rogue, Serenity, Dr. Horrible's Sing-Along Musical, Cabin in the Woods, The Scarlet Letter, Sin City, Hot Fuzz, Team America, The Labyrinth, Love Actually, (anything with Gary Oldman!), Boondock Saints, Snatch, Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy, Taking Lives, The 5th Element, Rules of Attraction, Pride and Prejudice, Closer, Hard Candy, Juno, Looper

TV Shows: This could be a bigger section, but I'll try to keep it short..
My biggest hard limit: not liking Firefly.
I seriously don't even know if I can be friends with these kind of people. Never seen it is one thing, tried to watch and didn't get it is a whole other ball of wax, but seen it and actually did not like it? Who the hell do you think you are?!

Doctor WHO, Venture Bros., Community, 30 Rock, Buffy, Angel, Dollhouse, Firefly (again: Joss Whedon is the shit, and if you don't believe that with all your heart, do not message me. Don't even try.), Arrested development (will quote randomly and not even realize I'm doing it, it's just part of my vocabulary now), Sarah Silverman Program, Parks and Rec, Bob's Burgers (I am Tina... in too many ways), and probably a handful more I'm forgetting.

Music: QUEEN, Weird Al, Florence and the Machine, La Roux, Kate Nash, The Decemberists, Ingrid Michelson, Lady Gaga, Lana Del Rey, Jamie Lidell, Death Cab for Cutie, Rilo Kiley, Scissor Sisters, Cat Power, Ludo, Cake, Bjork, Eve6, Flaming Lips, The Postal Service, Stephen Lynch, Flight of the Concords, every Disney song ever recorded (guilty pleasure, but it makes me an incredibly productive person, seriously it works like magic), and much more. Mostly I just turn pandora on and let them tell me good artists, new and old.

Food: Thai, specifically curry, spicy, but I also can not get enough Indian and Pakistani curry, and sushi. I'll try almost anything once, but I know what I like. Mushrooms remind me of slugs and milk makes me gag.
The six things I could never do without
1) My Hands (everything I love in the world, I need my hands for. Without them I would be lost).
2) Yarn & knitting needles.
3) Penises (a fake one will do).
4) Vaginas (my boyfriend is trying to convince me the plural of vagina is "vaginae" which is just gross, lol).
5) Curry (Indian, Thai, or Pakistani, I love them all--nomnomnom).
6) Gary Oldman (nomnomnom).
I spend a lot of time thinking about
My future.

Your mom.

How they just don't make men like Steve Martin and Bill Murray anymore. I hope to one day have an iota of the charisma they had (and, really, still have).

Human rights and what I can be doing to better the lives of the less privileged.

Where I fall on the Kinsey scale. I'd like to say I'm right in the middle, but I really swim around the spectrum back and forth depending on my mood. When it comes to attraction I'm much more likely to say female bodies please my eyes and make me say, "Daaaayyyum." But men are so much easier. I know if a guy wants to fuck me pretty easily, but the ladies are still a mystery to me. I think about sex, sexuality, and queerness a lot.
On a typical Friday night I am
Watching whatever is on Netflix, performing or practicing a burlesque routine, or out eating and/or drinking with friends.

I might also be knitting, crafting, cross-stitching, or writing -- depending on what has inspired me that day. ^_^
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I have an entire closet of costumes. It's overflowing. Two bins of shoes, 2 suitcases full of clothes, a laundry basket filled with corsets, and plastic bags filled with sequined bras, fringed skirts, gloves, stockings, and panties. It's ridiculous.

I love finding pictures of ladies and gentlemen on here with their animals. One of my favorite people, Tim Burton, once said you can tell a lot about someone by how they treat animals. Evil people will kick a pet, and the villains in his movie almost always do. I can't trust someone that isn't an animal lover. They have to be evil.

I may never find someone that I love more than myself and I have absolutely no problem with that :P. And that's not narcissistic, has nothing to do with my looks, I just truly love myself and I'm very confident about how amazing I am.
I’m looking for
  • Everybody
  • Ages 21–45
  • Near me
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating
You should message me if
You are a feminist. (For reference: a feminist is someone that believes women are in fact people, living, breathing human beings, that deserves every right that a man does.) This is an absolute deal breaker. If you do not believe the sexes should be equal, or if you are under the misconception that they already are, then do not message me. I don't need that kind of ignorance or negativity in my life. Thanks! :)

You should have a profile picture! More than 3 actually is preferred. I won't respond to people who don't have pictures. Unless you can give me a good reason, it says to me you're either cheating on your partner or you're ashamed of meeting people online, both of which are deal breakers and turn offs.

If you can handle a poly relationship. Being polyamorous does not mean I need more than one sexual partner because I'm trying to fill some void, it means I love love and my partner does too. It means I don't limit myself from loving as much as I can when I want to and on my terms, no one else's. It means I don't let society govern whom I'm going to love, when, or how many. If you can't fathom that, then please don't waste our time.

I refuse to date a Nickleback fan.

I hate fedoras. Unless you're Indiana Jones, you have no right to be wearing one.

If you think being nice to women means they owe you something in return or if you have ever said you were "friendzoned" in a negative way, I will probably hate you.

Thanks for reading!