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ferndalien

29 F Park Ridge, IL

My Details

Last Online
Online now!
Orientation
Bisexual
Ethnicity
White
Height
6′ 0″ (1.83m)
Body Type
Average
Diet
Strictly anything
Smokes
No
Drinks
Socially
Drugs
Never
Religion
Agnosticism, and laughing about it
Sign
Taurus, but it doesn’t matter
Education
Graduated from two-year college
Job
Other
Income
Less than $20,000
Relationship Status
Open relationship
Relationship Type
Strictly non-monogamous
Offspring
Doesn’t have kids, and doesn’t want any
Pets
Likes dogs and likes cats
Speaks
English (Fluently)

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My self-summary
***hanging out away from Detroit for a bit, but that is home. I'm normally not looking for casual sex, but let's face it: I can't long-term date on a short-term stay.***

I used to live in Plymouth, Michigan. People often ask me why I moved, and it's pretty easy: Plymouth is perfect if you're white, cisgender, straight (exceptions for bi girls in heterosexual relationships), ostensibly monogamous, in your mid-thirties, Christian (preferably protestant), middle to upper-middle class, want two and a half kids, a puppy dog and a (white) picket fence.

I'm just white. I rather failed at Plymouth.
(And, yes, if you're from Plymouth, I chuckle heartily to myself when I see you browsed my profile. I hope it's a better place for you than it was for me.)
What I’m doing with my life
Gorram, I'm supposed to do something with it?

I guess I'm taking it travelling with me. Like a small rock in my pack, I know it's there, but it really isn't *much* of a burden.

Every once in a while, I stop, take it out and smash it to pieces. Sometimes they're big; sometimes they're minuscule. Either way, I rearrange them, and piece them back together. My life always comes out more beautiful than before, but that's only because I had the courage to break it down and - more importantly - put it back together again. Kintsugi.
I’m really good at
Cooking. Sometimes I think it's the only thing I'm good at. I don't remember the last time I made a meal that was up to my standards, but I also don't remember the last time I made a meal for someone else that they didn't get giddy over.

Skipping in and out of crosswalks.

Reading your profile before looking at your picture(s).

Writing bad introduction emails.

Compersion.
The first things people usually notice about me
My personal sense of fashion; you don't get to be the Ferndale Jam Lady without having an inappropriate amount of fruit related clothing.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
This is the part where all the kids point out how in touch with pop culture they are... or how out of touch and cool they are, right? All this as though people with disparate tastes are less compatible. Mostly: fuck that; I've yet to come across someone that I couldn't relate to because we read different books. When I had a car, the rule for guests was "the radio's yours; play me your music."

So treat these as conversation starters rather than eliminators.

I kinda have a thing for food, science, and history, so Mark Kurlansky's Salt was quite well received. I also really dig Craig Thompson's Blankets - in no small part because it has massive parallels to my life. The best thing I've read recently has been Grant Morrison's run on Doom Patrol (only through the first trade).

Theatrically, Darren Aronofsky can do no wrong and his films Requiem for a Dream and The Fountain are tops for me. The best movie I've seen recently is Her.

Shows I'm currently enjoying: Orange is the New Black, Game of Thrones, and HIMYM. Favorite shows that have finished their run: Firefly, Breaking Bad, the new Outer Limits. Yeah, I like pretty mainstream tv.

Music? Johnny Cash is a constant. Beyond that, it's been an eclectic mix ranging from Daft Punk to punk revival a la The Sounds and Against Me! to Bob and Jakob Dylan to mid-nineties Christian industrial.

Food: if it's properly cooked and well seasoned, I'll dig it. The last savory thing I made was vegan kale soup (adulterated with chorizo, bacon, and pork neck). The last sweet thing was tiramisu (w/ homemade mascarpone). The last thing I craved: Carolina barbeque.
The six things I could never do without
Hey now, let's not limit ourselves. I like to think there isn't a thing that has that sort of control over my life. (I'm a bit of a literalist, and it's probably really annoying.)

Half a dozen things I *really* like to have access too?
A proper chef's knife
my hiking backpack with my passport
passion
fashionable accessories
nice shampoo and conditioner
a french press
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Gee, Brain, what do you wanna do tonight?
On a typical Friday night I am
Being social be it a book club, house parties, dancing, game nights, date nights, or the bar with friends.

That is, unless I'm in bed early so I can be at work at 5am.

04-11: Thai, bike talk, and a late date in
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I listen to Radiolab in the shower.
I’m looking for
  • Girls who like girls
  • Ages 22–49
  • Near me
  • For new friends, casual sex
You should message me if
You're a person(s) that thinks it'd be worth your time. And mine.

You are nurturing, play by the platinum rule, and put other people ahead of yourself.

You understand the notion that a man should pick up a woman's tab to display his ability to support her is outdated, yet you realize that the realities of the wage inequality between men/women/transwomen mean it's still a polite gesture. (This is a statement on agency and your ability to be aware of privilege far more than it is on wanting free food.)

You want to make me a mixtape. But not a tape, since I don't have a cassette player. A mix playlist, I suppose, even though that sounds way less romantic.

You dole out unusual compliments.

If you aren't near Ferndale, you don't mind coming to me. Seriously. I'm happily bikebound, but that does limit for nearly everyone how far I'm willing to travel. Especially if I'm supposed to be pretty at the end of the ride.

These aren't all necessary, but they're good places to start.