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32 San Jose, CA Woman


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I’m looking for

  • Everyone
  • Ages 23–60
  • Located anywhere
  • For new friends

My details

Last online
Yesterday – 12:26pm
5′ 9″ (1.75m)
Body Type
Mostly anything
Other, and laughing about it
Aries, but it doesn’t matter
Dropped out of Ph.D program
Seeing Someone
Strictly non-monogamous
Doesn’t have kids
Has dogs and likes cats
English (Fluently)
My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
I'm a queer polyamorous transplant who grew up here but lived in East Tennessee for the last seven years, and Santa Cruz before that. Every day so far has been whiplash from culture shock, and I'm not planning to pay much attention to this site until I get settled.


If you choose to message me anyway- I welcome friends and great experiences- be aware that I am using several email filters and I delete messages that look like they could be cut and pasted to several profiles, even if you are nice and we are a high match.

I have a special love for tea and going out to dinner by myself. I love traveling and trying new things, but paradoxically I tend to be a bit of a hermit these days.

I love art but have no real eye or hand for it. In a perfect world I'd surround myself with artists to help coax me out of my overly practical self from time to time. I'm an INTJ.
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
I moved to Tennessee for grad school in the sciences, but had to effectively drop out four years ago for health reasons. In the meantime I've been fostering dogs, gardening, and pondering how to build a true sense of community with where and who I am today, rather than with where I wish I was. I like to think of it as the anti- Burning Man.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
puzzles, finding things, talking about what bothers me (although it takes me a while to figure it out), having compassion, compromise, endurance, synthesis, detecting strange smells
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
My height, my hair, my shoes, my laugh...I walk with a cane sometimes and I can be extremely stubborn.

Because folks keep asking: the cane is to help me walk, not a fashion statement. It also helps me to thwack people, poke things, and catch things before they blow away.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
I like going out to lunch or dinner by myself and trying new foods. I enjoy slowly perusing menus and imagining different flavors, even if I already know what I want.

I like books that make me think. I have a huge book collection but I've read less of it than I would like to admit. I think the best novels are concisely written and reveal something important about human nature.

There isn't much music that I *don't* like. I'm especially fond of Aphex Twin and industrial music. Lately I've been listening to a lot of pop/R&B and 90's rock. It varies. As long as the music doesn't make me cringe I'm generally delighted to hear new things.

Most of the genres of movies and shows have their place depending on my mood. I prefer my horror movies with a healthy dose of camp. I have a wicked sense of humor that ranges from 12 years old to biting sarcasm, and yet I am easily offended if you know how. Thusly I love comedy but it can be a struggle to find comedy that 'feels right', especially out in public.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
I could do without just about anything at this point in my life. I have learned that I can adapt more than I ever gave myself credit for when I was younger.

I live for moments. Moments that take my breath away, that make me laugh and see the beauty in things, moments that make me roll my eyes at the world while I develop more patience.

If I'm forced to pick a few of the creature comforts, that would probably be plumbing and modern medicine.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
What is the right way to place value on knowledge and intelligence when the mind and/or brain is such a fragile thing?
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
Hanging out with my dog at home. I can't afford to go out as much as I might like.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I love pen-pals, but I am very very bad at keeping things going over an extended period of time.

I don't know how to relate to completely straight people or folks that have never worked with their hands.

My brother thinks I should filter all my OKC emails to eliminate anything pulled out of a PUA forum. Hmm. If you don't know what that means, you might not be an idiot.
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
-You value friendship with women whether or not it "goes anywhere".
-You've read my whole profile and think we might have something in common.
-You dig and respect hermits
-You'd be up for skill sharing (I love to learn from people!)
-You can recommend cheap, quiet places to recharge in the Bay Area, especially any quiet places for tea in East San Jose
-You are open to kind, radical honesty