Find better matches with our advanced
matching system

—% Match
—% Enemy


28 F New York, NY

I’m looking for

  • Men who like women
  • Ages 27–36
  • Near me
  • Who are single
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating

My Details

Last Online
Oct 19
5′ 6″ (1.68m)
Body Type
Atheism, but not too serious about it
Cancer, but it doesn’t matter
Graduated from masters program
Banking / Finance
Relationship Status
Relationship Type
Doesn’t have kids
Likes dogs and likes cats
English (Fluently), Polish (Okay)

Similar Users

My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
I'm awesome.

One of my BFFLs and I recently started playing a game called, "Biggest boner-kill." We've decided that the worst question someone can ask on a first date is, "Why are you still single?" It's the weirdest question and not something we'd ever think to ask a guy because no one is going to answer honestly if they're secretly batshit. So the next time a dude asks, I'm going to try to come up with his worst nightmare.

"I'm looking for my partner-in-Christ, and you heathens are screwing it up for us. Me and Jesus, that is."

"Well... have you heard of furries? Because if not, buckle your seatbelt."

et cet.
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
I work relatively long hours at an investment bank. I love my job and I get to work with some of the brightest people I know. Paying off my student loans is pretty awesome too.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
Listening. Kissing. Standardized testing. Dancing like no one is watching even when I'm the only one dancing and there isn't really a dance floor. Putting it in perspective.
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I use douche-y language and then physically recoil at how pretentious I sound. Sorry :(

I tell the worst stories. I've gotten really good at telling my sister the crazy shit that happens in my life, but if you're anyone else, I will treat you to ten sidetracks. Sorry :(
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
I have "in-public" books and "in-private" books - my tastes range from Gregory Maguire to the Harry Potter books to a Rushdie novel I've been toting around to Pride and Prejudice and Zombies.

As for music, I don't want to be one of those people that says "everything!" but I'm equally happy hanging out at a jazz bar or losing my right shoe at a Rancid concert that I attended because my big brother couldn't get his son to go (true story). I was recently in Poland, and loved that there was a surprise free public opera in celebration of the 650th anniversary of the founding of Jagiellonian University. And to round out how typical I am, I'm not too fond of country, haha.

I haven't been to the movies in years. I'm not brave enough to go alone, my friends always want to see something else, and movies are really crappy date ideas. (I think - I'm so convinced of this that the last movie I saw with a boyfriend was Snakes on a Plane which MIGHT have something to do with that sentiment, haha).
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
pandora - I choose music that sets the mood for the day.

caffeine - seriously though, it's an addiction. I prefer chai lattes, especially with Oregon Chai. What's the opposite of a purist? That's me.

babbel and all those other language software folks - I speak roughly eight words of French, but I've decided I want to retire in Nice
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
what's next. I theoretically have a lot of life left and a lot of self-shaping to go. I fully plan on being crotchety when I'm old, but I need some badass life stories to justify being so crotchety. I'm working on getting those down. Then my grandkids can bitch about how every time I tell a story, there are ten badass tangents and I never get to the point.
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
surrounding myself with quality people. Usually dinner and drinks. I'm bad at planning well in advance, so I tend to hammer out plans mid-day Friday.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I LOVE the subway. Two weeks ago, I spent twenty minutes trying to figure out how to tell a guy in a suit that his fly was undone, and last week I watched a guy do a line of coke off his hard hat.


Since I wrote the above, I've had a guy give me his pot dealer's number and another guy give me a single red rose. Same night. Seriously, I love the subway. Also, have you seen the rats?
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
You're patient. My job is fairly predictable, but sometimes things come up. Bonus points if your job is like this (or, say, you're a grad student who puts in long hours).

You think you're interesting. Boring people suck, but not as much as people who are completely lacking in self-confidence.

You're socially liberal. I dumped a guy recently because he made fat jokes and jokes about transgendered people. I am neither, but nothing irritates the hell out of me more than when any individual thinks it's cool to dump on people for having any characteristic that scares them.

Addendum: You're not a pompous dick. I had a guy ask me if I've ever heard of Nietzsche. When I stared at him thinking, "Are you effing serious?", he interpreted this to mean that no, I haven't. He then yelled at me (in a bar) about being provincial. Men, the bar is so fucking low for you right now.

Addendum the second: I'm finally at a point in dating where I think even OKC has given up on me. "I think we have some serial killers in the back?" says the hopeful internet bot.