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final_hope

41 M Portland, OR

My Details

Last Online
Aug 17
Orientation
Straight
Ethnicity
White
Height
6′ 2″ (1.88m)
Body Type
Athletic
Diet
Mostly anything
Smokes
No
Drinks
Socially
Drugs
Religion
Atheism, and somewhat serious about it
Sign
Sagittarius, and it’s fun to think about
Education
Graduated from masters program
Job
Medicine
Income
Rather not say
Relationship Status
Single
Relationship Type
Offspring
Doesn’t have kids
Pets
Likes dogs and likes cats
Speaks
English (Fluently)

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My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
I like to talk, think and joke. I can be sweet, but I am more known for my East Coast, direct, truthful ways. My favorite are the silly-billy times. I like fun. I tend to be pretty happy but I am not so into the forced positivity. I am more interested in the truth and things being interesting and funny than I am in platitudes and social mores. I am not a big fan of fake things or pretense... I like to name the elephant in the room and celebrate the awkward. I like to joke around... a lot. I can be pretty sarcastic (in a friendly way). I have a huge crazy imagination that can be too much for some at times... In high school I was a class clown / philosopher / popular / weirdo. At heart I am a creative, dreamer type person who probably gets more out of a good conversation than anything else. I am not mainstream, but I rebel against the alternative, and I embrace the pragmatic / hard-boiled / Buddhist / here-and-now of the everyday. I am interested in having the wildest mind while participating in the shopping mall of ordinary times. I like people like Stephen Colbert and Andy Warhol. I'm interested in looking at and thinking about all the slices of life in the world, all the little vignettes, kind of like the cut-aways in the Richard Scary children's books (which I loved)...

I dream of making commercials that make fun of commercials, and of life, and of our world. I tease my friend about opening an ad agency where he does all the production work and I just yell all my ideas at him through a squawky intercom... It would be so great to get paid to do this, and to maybe live like Dr. Evil in an ineffectual floating lair somewhere, preferably in a tropical paradise...

I dream of being a life student, where I stroll around Victorian country estates, or lounge on ancient Greek patios, and just shoot the incredible shit. Maybe hiking the most gorgeous places on earth and having 12-hour mind-bending conversations with the super-educated...

I dream of being a freestyle rapper / poet / comedian who never writes anything down and who fills immense stadiums with blimps lingering overhead... Kind of like Little Wayne meets Laurie Anderson with Hans Zimmer doing the production... (Do not be confused, I cannot actually rap and will not be doing so on our date)...

In real life I guess I strive to be a balanced fulfilled person. I am interested in my career and I want to continue developing it. I want to own a house one day, or live in an incredible place. I have had a lot of loves and great partners in my time but I want to find a more long lasting, truer love; a twin, a partner in crime. I want to meet someone who plays in my world of joking, thinking, and reflection, and who dishes it out just as much as she understands... I have had great friends and constellations of people come and go over the years, and I want to fight off the accelerating, capitalist, modernizing, aging, pairing-off of my friends (like the stars), and have them coalesce once again into a critical mass singularity like college or high school. (When are we all going to have that huge party on that sand bar island, meetup in the giant tree from "Go Dog Go", or all live in that crazy apartment building commune together?) I could see having kids and loving it with my true person one day, but I don't have to... I love kids though. Mostly I want to continue to feel creatively fulfilled, and make people laugh...
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
I'm a child and family therapist. I work with children and their parents. I earned my license about a year ago and will soon transition soon to more of a group practice type of job. UPDATE: I got the job and have started full time! Yay me! For me the profession is great, and terrible, and rewarding, and ridiculous, sometimes awkward, sometimes a little too Pollyanna / superhero-y and regularly amazing... My new job has a lot less of the terrible. I love the shit out of the moving times when it is just so nice and fun to be with the families...

I LOVE going to the river and lying in the sun, dipping in and out of the water, listening to music, reading, drinking sometimes, and hanging out with friends... I REALLY love the sun and the summer, and I take full advantage of it. I mean like April to late October advantage... Walking and hiking is nice. Talking is nice. Skiing, sailing, biking, meditating, working out, camping, canoe trips, hanging out by fires, not waiting in lines for suckers (that means you Porque No and Salt & Straw;) ), slow bike rides on quiet streets, the usual things... Sometimes I imagine impersonating regular people who seem to have things more made than me and when I do that I think that one of my first assignments would be going and finding those long lines to happily stand in...

I love free associating, wrestling, dancing, talking about politics, economics, science, what we are reading, the fate of the world, and psychology. I love joking with people who live within a close enough joking demographic to myself... I do little projects sometimes, like I have a little pink book with hundreds of fake band names that I made up... (Teen Horror Blast, Dysthymic Clarity, Mom Jeans...) I've had blogs, tumblrs, made short stories, collages, fancy mix cd's, a magazine of my writing, things like that...

I love hanging out with friends at group dinners or at one of their apartments or houses. I love to hear gossip. I love to make things up and make people laugh. I like constrained free association. I love to rule a small room with my humor... I'm sure that sounds terrible, but it's the truth.

I like to think and talk about things like what it is to be alive, what it is to be my age, what it is like to be mortal, to be liberal, to live in the Northwest, to live in a smallish urban environment under eternal cloud cover, to be white, to have grown up well-off and educated, and to live in our time period, to be who each of us is... I like to wonder about subjects with friends and connect the dots of things that we each have read, wondered, imagined, observed, disagreed upon, etc... I value being casual, playful, fun, original, and trying to articulate the unspoken and the big picture (Sagittarius although it's hard for me to believe that astrology is real)... I laugh at everything all day long, frequently at myself. I get that what I write might come off as kind of full of myself or stilted, but I'd rather make that mistake and be sincere and say things, than just be be flippant or cool and not say much. ; )
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
I can be good at talking sometimes. I can be good at saying what no one else is saying and changing the room for the better. I can really make people laugh once I know them... I like to ask a lot of embarrassing questions... I'm great at boccie ball and activities that require balance.
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I am tall and thin. I tend to wear the same clothing a lot. I will try to make you laugh. I sometimes say really strange things.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
Books: Mostly nonfiction - Politics, economics, state of the world kind of stuff, psychology. Occasionally fiction - in the style of the romantic and the glamorous. Fiction that I have enjoyed include things like Brett Easton Ellis (but I wish he stopped with the narcissism and related amazing descriptions of our fall-of-Rome type culture and didn't continue on into actual horror), Jane Austen (just like the next one ->), F. Scott Fitzgerald (he's honest in distilling the essence of life to love, money / power, and the wonderful / romantic details of American culture), "Prep" (I went to this kind of school growing up - love to read about the carefully execute patina of the preppy lifestyle as I was tortured by it for 18 years), "Crazy Rich Asians" (ridiculous modern fantasy), David Sedaris (sometimes I think he is just anyone like me who happened to actually write - love the self depreciation and embracing (or at least writing and talking a lot about) the negative - so human and real), things like that... Also all those suffering with nothing books, like Zora Neale Hurston and Toni Morrison, etc. Every pirate voyage, sail around the world, explorer type book. I'm kind of into those magical realism books by Anthony Doerr (friend from high school) - so human in the gritty but beautiful / graceful stories he tells.

News: Love Rachel Maddow (I would cry if I met her), L.A. Times, New York Times, The Economist, Mother Jones, All In With Chris Hayes, every lefty article posted on Facebook and Twitter, science articles...

Movies: I like to watch them! (ha) Recentish one's I remember liking: Blue Jasmine, Her, The Perks of Being a Wallflower, Spring Breakers, Les Miserables, Moonrise kingdom, Bridesmaids, Black Swan, The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo, Ai Weiwei: Never Sorry, Pina, The Hunger Games series (especially the society part in the beginning), In Time, Inception, Atonement, Pride & Prejudice... I like Woody Allen, and I love a lot of (new) foreign films. Rom-com's (This Is 40)...

TV: The Colbert Report, Frontline, It's Always Sunny In Philadelphia, Curb Your Enthusiasm, Downton Abbey, Breaking Bad, Girls, Made in Chelsea, Friendzone, Kroll Show, The Universe, international / fancy house shows, dating shows... I loved Skins, Seinfeld, The Wire, Homeland, The Hills, Blind Date...

Comedy: Love Rob Delaney's tweets (recently saw him front row!!) - I kind of feel like my favorite comedy happens on Twitter now, Jenny Slate (PubLizity, Bestie By Bestie), Sarah Silverman, Amy Sedaris, Jim Gaffigan (Midwestern zen master), Maria Bamford (those condescending officy woman voices!).

Music: EDM (electro-house, trap, dubstep), mashups, rap, pop, indie, Classical, Classic Rock... I go to EDM shows every few weeks and dance, even though I am about twice the age of almost everyone else... I like to go to the symphony on occasion. I grew up in a home that played classical music and show tunes and stuff like that constantly and I love it as background music... I have little aversion to pop music but I prefer it remixed with some bass or house or something. I have been to more than 50 Dead shows in my youth but don't listen to that kind of music too much anymore (but am still secretly a collector). I love to make fun of it and be made fun of for my hippie past... I used to live in a community of NW indie musicians and artists (and am still friends with some - K records / Olympia stuff) but I have never been super into that kind of music (aside from how simple / smart it can be - I LOVE the people though)...

Food: Japanese / Thai / Mexican / limes / cilantro / mint / basil / kale / heirloom tomatoes / fresh fish / sharp cheese / magical free range eggs / goat milk / sprouted bread / Middle Eastern / Korean / anything new, different, weird... (But... I do eat chicken burritos almost everyday to save time and money - I know, it's weird). I LOVE the subtle amazingness of food and sense memory (especially grilled / smoked things) -one of the richest corners of the human experience, BUT I would survive if food was in pill form... I don't like the word gastropub. Or gastro anything. Gross. Not a fan of pretense or things that sound like gas.

I like walking around sometimes on First Thursday / First Friday and going to similar art things. I mostly don't like art that I experience, but I love being near it, and I LOVE some of it. The people can be good, and it makes me feel super energized and alive. It's almost like it's so boring, and bad, and not good, and challenging to your attention span, that it makes you super happy and the whole rest of the world seem so great... Like meditation, or like a punk show in a super bare room with hardwood floors. Not too into Last Thursday except in a kind of perverse sociological fascination (also to be enjoyed at raves and jam band concerts). Don't get me wrong, I am perversely fascinated, and I do go to raves (occasionally). I like to see performance art when I learn of it (I have really liked Laurie Anderson and Miranda July over the years) Love the Yes Men. Have enjoyed modern dance at times...

I've somehow lived a life of only occasionally going to bars and I barely even know what the common drinks are, etc. I know you all want some dark handsome man who likes scotch or whatever but that shit is gross...

I like going to musicals and plays on occasion (I saw 'Legally Blonde: The Musical'. It was AWESOME)...

I like going to lectures when I learn about ones that I am interested in. (I used to go to art lectures sometimes (I would still like to go for the things that I like the most), I saw the Karl Rove / Howard Dean debate awhile back...) I have gone to economics lectures, architecture lectures, different things like that...

I have gone to many poetry readings and I love parts of them but also find it hard to pay attention... Once I saw this guy in white pants do a spontaneous freestyle slam poetry thing on the steps of the Esprit factory in San Francisco... Then he threw Starbursts all over us -SO good...
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
iPod / joking / talking / friends / exercise / sun
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
My mortality. Girls / Women. Social inequality. Aesthetic details around me. The vastness of the universe.
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
Meeting you, hanging out with small groups of friends eating and talking. I could easily be at home with nothing to do though, watching a movie or something while I read articles and stuff on my iPad. I know how cool this sounds... Sometimes I'm out dancing at show or going to an event of some kind...
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I will tell you anything. I am open to a fault.
I’m looking for
  • Girls who like guys
  • Ages 36–41
  • Near me
  • Who are single
  • For long-term dating, short-term dating
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
You are a woman. You are single and are attracted to men. You like to talk, laugh, and observe. You can be playful and silly. You are down-to-earth, or can be down-to-earth. You resonate with some of what I've said. You have some quality of vulnerability, in a good way.