Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
“It's not worth doing something unless someone, somewhere, would
much rather you weren't doing it.” ~Terry Pratchett
Surprise me. Tell me something about yourself that makes you stand
out from all the other profiles I click through on this site.
I am unique. My friends like to say special. I'm not sure if they
mean that as a compliment since they often snicker and point at a
short bus when they say it.
Lewis Black learned sarcasm from me. He was my prize pupil and thus
it was a proud day when the student surpassed the teacher.
Never poke a hurricane in the eye. They only have the one eye and
it REALLY pisses them off.
A friend of mine recently mentioned how glad he was to be into his
mid/late-30s. He said it was nice to have the sex drive back off
just enough to interesting things like learning how to cook. It
just so happens that I started learning how to cook in that time
frame as well. I am actually pretty good at this cooking thing, but
don't worry, my sex drive is still healthy enough to enjoy some
quality naked time.
I also brew beer. And I'm good at that too. So I can literally wine
(as long as it's barley wine) and dine you all by myself. Some
friends are even trying to talk me into starting a brewery with
them. So I got that going for me.
I read fantasy novels and watch cartoons. There. I said it. Don't
I take pictures. Artsy ones. I'm good at it. I swear I won't beg to
take naked pictures of you, but if you're gonna twist my arm about
it then I'll take one for the team.
So you probably noticed the Buddhism in that column over there. I'm
not particularly devout (because booze and meat are yummy), but its
basic message of balance with yourself and the world around you
appeals to me. I don't hate Christianity. In fact, if Christianity
is important to you finding balance in the world then I fully
support and encourage you to keep on believing.
If it's not Scottish, it's crap!
. . . And while we're on that particular topic: You got any Scotch?
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
My brother and I are from Czechoslavakia, even though no one can
tell. We escaped during the '75 riots, by throwing many rocks at a
Russian tank. We ran from it to come to America, but, boy, we gave
up many things. Back there, we have a nice, groovy apartment, three
cars and a summer house, which the government now owns! Back there,
we have medical degrees - but here in America we must be salesman
for decorative bathroom fixtures. There, we are brain
~Two Wild and Crazy Guys, SNL
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
Posting stupid yet funny video and picture responses on Facebook.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
Books: I like to read. I also don't buy toilet paper, so the
thicker the book. the better.
TV: I used to like the History Channel but then the rednecks took
over and I began to worry about my fellow man.
Movies: Ooh! Ooh! I wanna watch another goddamn vampire
Food: Yes please.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
David Letterman is retiring at the end of the year. Top Ten/Six
lists should be retired as well. I like too much stuff (much of it
stupid) to go making an ass of myself trying to make an arbitrary
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
The Dude abides. I don't know about you but I take comfort in that.
It's good knowin' he's out there. The Dude. Takin' 'er easy for all
us sinners. Shoosh. I sure hope he makes the finals.
~Sam Elliot, The Big Lebowski
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
My cat has more personality than most people.
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
You're not dead yet.
Neither is your parrot.
You did not have the salmon mousse.
The Lady of the Lake, her arm clad in the purest shimmering samite
held aloft Excalibur from the bosom of the water, signifying by
divine providence that you are to carry Excalibur.
You believe that every sperm is sacred.
You are not a witch.
Your favorite color is blue . . . No! Yellow!
Your mother was a hamster and your father smelt of
If you answered "no" to any of the above statements then it's off
to medical experiments for the lot of you.
Who are you looking for?
This helps us know who to show you on OkCupid.