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42 Oakland, CA Man


I’m looking for

  • Women
  • Ages 27–41
  • Near me
  • For short-term dating, casual sex

My Details

Last Online
Jan 12
Hispanic / Latin, White
5′ 10″ (1.78m)
Body Type
Strictly anything
Atheism, and laughing about it
Capricorn, but it doesn’t matter
Graduated from university
Rather not say
Relationship Status
Seeing Someone
Relationship Type
Doesn’t have kids, but wants them
Likes dogs and has cats
English (Fluently), Spanish (Fluently), French (Poorly), German (Poorly), LISP (Okay)

Similar Users

My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
i just moved back to the bay area and am happily ensconced in N Oakland with the love of my life, imwendysf. i'm not currently really looking for anything on this site, but if you want to reach out to me for some reason, hit that message button :)

Old essay:
i just landed in Santa Monica after spending a year-long break from the best coast in South Beach. hooray! change is good. :)

first off, don't be fooled by the profile pic. i happen to think that boys look attractive in suits, but i'm not often in one. in fact, that's my only suit and i pretty much only wear it to weddings.

and now, back to your regularly scheduled profile:

party animal geek malesbian seeks partner in crime!!

hrm.. this whole online dating thing is so different than the old RL equivalent. instead of getting a gut feeling about who a person is and what they're like by directly seeing the person interact with you and the world around, one is forced to try and get inside their head by reading their words.

well in that vein, welcome to my head!

i like to think that i'm truly special; not just "special" in that way we were brought up to believe that everyone is special. i'm a lesbian trapped in a man's body. i'm a free spirit who has never and will never conform to anyone else's rules. i care deeply about others and have morals, but they're my own. nobody dictated them to me. i'm honest, often to a fault. if there is something you think can't be told to your significant other, you're with the wrong person.
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
my goal in life is not to spend most of it slaving away in an office. a couple years ago, i did another four years' time in boston at a startup, suffering through COLD winters so that i could save up enough money to do work full-time on creating the future that i really want. see my "I spend a lot of time thinking about" essay below for what that is. i spent some time in SF, nearly died on a motorcycle, met a gal, ended up in Miami with her, and then broke up. so now i'm back at the partner search.

i've been entertained by rock climbing, scuba diving, horseback riding, motorcycling, flying, skydiving, surfing, off-roading, spelunking, bodyboarding, etc.

i hope to go back to the playa, this year. i've been 8 times since my first in 2000. if this is greek to you, read up on Burning Man. if you've made it this far into my profile and don't know what it is, you owe it to yourself to commit to yourself to do everything you can do to go RIGHT NOW, and then figure out a way to make it happen for you.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
partying. no really. i'm sure i could teach you a thing or ten :P

just because i live to party doesn't mean that's the only thing i'm good at, though. i haven't seen a sunday NYT crossword that has stumped me in over a decade, i graduated MIT in three years, i'm a successful businessman, etc. i know what you're thinking... all this and modesty, too? how can i be so lucky? :P it is ungentlemanly to brag, but with all these fish in this sea, how else am i supposed to get you to start a dialog with me??
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
is how fast i talk. the second thing might be how much i eat, drink, and be merry. third, that i'm a cunning linguist ;)
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
i haven't been reading enough books, lately. when i do, they're random books that cover the full spectrum, but the ones that i remember most fondly are usually science fiction. robert heinlein's polyamory-friendly stuff is always enjoyable: Stranger in a Strange Land, The Cat Who Walks Through Walls, etc... anything by vernor vinge and most by neal stephenson.

i'm really into stereoscopic 3D movies. if you missed Coraline, you missed out! it's fabulous that the powers that be finally settled on a hi-def 3D blu-ray standard and we can look forward to large autostereoscopic displays in homes some day.

i don't own a TV and don't care much for most of the programming one finds on them. i'm *in love* with Californication, though. fantastic fucking writing!

music is my hot, hot sex. if that's what's up, nothing beats old-skool enigma. if i'm hanging out stoned, then of course it needs to be some kinky reggae. when i rage, i rage to seattle grunge. usually, i just want upbeat happy music. clitrock (ani, etc) is good. if i need more soul, janis j or tracy c works.

eating is one of the things i enjoy most in life. please tell me you do, too? thinking about the day's shared culinary adventures makes me eager to get up in the morning.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
while i was living in SF, i was fortunate enough to meet some wonderful women. i loved my polyglamorous life! in Miami, i found the very liberal and liberated women that were doing it for me in SF were far fewer and farther between. thanks to OkC, though, i found LilyMélodie, who was a fantastic lover and is now a great friend. she probably wouldn't mind telling you about me if you'd like a female third party perspective on me. her profile is currently closed, though, so i guess you'll have to go through me, first :(

hopefully, you, Dear Reader, want to go gallivanting around the (non-cold) world with me. we need to have adventures! like the headline says, i seek a partner in crime. no, i don't consider myself a real criminal, but i like to have fun! i want somebody to have fun with. i want somebody that wants to go traipsing around the world looking for trouble (in the good sense of the word). i'm also keenly interested in starting a family once i find my partner. hopefully that doesn't terrify you? i want somebody who isn't afraid of anything and who can trust me enough to suppress that horrible (but natural) thing called jealousy and share me and our love in a committed monogamish relationship. compersion is good!

which brings us to the whole sex thing... i understand that 90% of those reading this are stuck in a classical view of sex where sex and love are inseparable. i'm not. and i'm looking for somebody from that remaining 10%. i'm openly sexual and one of the things i enjoy most in life is sharing beautiful intimate experiences with others. in our ideal future, the two of us are strongly committed to each other, but we sometimes share our love with others and, somewhat paradoxically, our love grows stronger by sharing it. and i don't mean that we have that stereotypical "open relationship" that we hear about which never works where we both date others on the side because we aren't satisfied with each other. i mean we have what i like to think of as an "ajar relationship". we occasionally go out together and hunt for playmates that we play with together. you're likely bisexual. i'm trisexual... i'll try anything!

unfortunately, guys don't really turn me on, but i'm not homophobic and not afraid to share the bed with another man if that's what you're in the mood for :)
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
friday nights are NEVER typical :D now that i'm not being a weekday slave, i have mixed feelings about fridays. i like that many of my enslaved friends can come out and play with me, but i dislike that i have to wait longer to get a drink at the bar ;)
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
that i really am a lesbian trapped in a man's body. what does that mean? it means that i'm in touch with my inner woman ;) i'm enthralled by all things woman. i took women's studies classes in college, have an extensive female sex toy collection, recently drove a forest green manual transmission outback wagon (the ultimate lesbianmobile), prefer cunnilingus to fellatio, etc.

more seriously, it's hard to explain. my first girlfriend is a lesbian. when i'm at a party, i somehow manage to end up engaged with and enthralled by the lesbian who i didn't figure out was a lesbian until embarrassingly late in our conversation. i love dyke nights and hanging out with the grrrlz! i realize this isn't a great answer, but for once i'm at a loss for words. i also love hanging out with my biologically male queer friends. gays are just generally better at having fun. gay bars are great. my last two roommates were two married men.
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
you find what i've written excites you!