Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
I grew up in Worcester, MA, which is a working class, Irish
Catholic city. It has some really cool underground punk subculture
that I wasn't really cool enough to discover while I was growing up
there, but I did find out how to write while I was there. Because
of its smallness and its whiteness, I had no other way to be seen,
so I had to write myself into existence in Worcester. Oakland feels
a little bit like Worcester, but a lot friendlier and with a lot
I graduated from college and law school, and now I'm working on
criminal policy at a small nonprofit in SF that's run by formerly
incarcerated people. A lot of the time, my work is guided by my
intuition, my spirit, and the unfailing sense of wholeness that I
touch when I meditate or climb or am deeply in love or deeply
focused on something. Sometimes, though, it's not guided by
anything at all (other than kind of a blind sense of needing to be
doing something). I'm definitely trying to find a balance.
When I go too long without being in nature, I get pretty depressed.
Same with going too long without being totally in my body--running
or climbing or yoga or meditating or dancing. And too long without
writing something. Every seven or so years I write something worth
I consider myself gay. I've been primarily with women since I was
16, with some beautiful experiences and relationships with men in
between. Ultimately for me, it comes down to chemistry--and it's
generally pretty quickly apparent whether there is chemistry or
not. I'm interested in meeting anyone and everyone, and at least in
love and sex, your gender/sexuality doesn't matter to me as much as
whether there's something between us.
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
learning how to love
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
dancing, rambling rambling stories, talking you into a longer hike
than the one you originally wanted to do, sanding, wood staining,
getting a headache from wood staining inside
getting better at letting my intuitive self guide me, in love, in
i'm not always good at eye contact with people i'm not sleeping
with. there's a lot of information to process in faces. i feel a
lot closer when i'm looking away, at first. fun fact :)
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
books: audre lorde, octavia butler, stephen king, dostoevsky, james
baldwin, neil gaiman, peter hoeg
movies: andrei rublev, the sacrifice, jaws
tv: the x-files, 30 rock, the wire, twin peaks, broad city
music: joanna newsom, cold specks, 60s-70s ska, desmond dekker,
joan armatrading, julie ruin, valerie june, cocteau twins, ISIS,
my mom's food
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
this audre lorde quote:
"Tell them about how you're never really a whole person if you
remain silent, because there's always that one little piece inside
you that wants to be spoken out, and if you keep ignoring it, it
gets madder and madder and hotter and hotter, and if you don't
speak it out one day it will just up and punch you in the mouth
from the inside."
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
beer at a bar or reading at home
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
you want to chat
you want to dance
you want to get coffee
you don't mind a hoppy IPA
you are open
you love something well
Who are you looking for?
This helps us know who to show you on OkCupid.