10) I have a lot more free time now that I'm no longer running for Pope.
9) I don't have birthdays anymore, I level up.
8) I'm finally 100 % cured of my Attention Deficit, hey look a butterfly!
7) This whole North Korea "thing" has me seriously reconsidering my friendship with Kim Jong Un.
6) I believe the Red Sox will win the World Series this year, I also believe in leprechauns and unicorns.
5) Sometimes the "sober" me gets presents days later in the mail from the "drunk" me. (eBay should have a breathalyzer)
4) I had to change my cat's name because someone figured out all my passwords.
3) Oh crap It happened again. :( Does anybody know how to change my kids name?
2) All I'm saying is that one of us is right, the other one is you.
1) Any woman who answers sarcasm with sarcasm is a keeper!