Alternatively I have this profile, and instead of feathers, I present to you key personal attributes to impress you.
Honest Profile Pictures - Yes, you will be amazed to hear I actually do look like my profile pictures. According to my in-depth statistical analysis, I am in fact 15.3% better looking in person.
Employed – In this day and age, employment is an essential part of being able to earn money to do stuff with. Unless you own an illegal casino, which unfortunately I do not, we need to work for a living. Having said that, I am gainfully employed as a Fraud advisor for a major bank. You have to admit my job title is impressive and gives no real key indication as to what I do for a living. Suffice to say, I prevent and investigate fraud.
Intelligent – My level of intelligence is directly correlative to your comprehension of a varied and robust vocabulary.
Personality – I like to entertain others with my stories, humour and my tales of peacocks. I’m an easy guy to get along with. Your parents will either refer to me as ‘son’ after the first time we meet, or be chasing me down the street with a shotgun, depending on the circumstances. I apologise in advance if this makes you feel uncomfortable, I will not call them Mum or Dad in return.
Humour – (Please see above) I prefer a sabre of wit as opposed to a verbal meat axe. I can also recite quotes from funny movies or TV shows and read jokes stored on my phone. I can tailor my humour to meet your needs, but my default setting is Dad jokes! Admit it, they're adorable.
Looking forward to catching up soon.