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38 M Grand Rapids, MI

My Details

Last Online
Online now!
5′ 6″ (1.68m)
Body Type
Mostly anything
Atheism, but not too serious about it
Gemini, but it doesn’t matter
Two-year college
Relationship Status
Relationship Type
Likes dogs

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My self-summary
Let's be honest. If you arent attracted to my pics (which I feel don't do me alot of justice and my selfies are bland at best) then you won't really be interested in a long boring profile anyway.

I don't really act my age.

I could bore you by telling you how much I like scrabble (I don't) but its not going to make you want to get to know me more. Well I guess if scrabble really gets you going in some weird way, or hey maybe you just like to spell your butt off. I'm not judging you.

I'm basically just looking for a nice girl to connect with. Easy enough. I want for you to experience all my awesomeness. It's wrong for it to go untapped. I said something funny to a girl in line at Kohl's last week and she peed her pants and got out of line. Just think of all the years of therapy that I've opened for her. No more boring life, bam.
What I’m doing with my life
Freelance IT Support and Website Rebranding.
I’m really good at
Quoting my fav movies.
Making people laugh.
Anything involving new technology, especially computers.
Useless trivia. Making you giggle uncontrollable.
Making homemade pizza but I have to admit it's been a while.
The first things people usually notice about me
My build.
My eyes.
Sarcastic sense of humor.
Uncanny ability to make babies stop crying.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
moviesClerks 2 (classic even though most prefer 1), Waiting, Kung Pow, Shaun Of The Dead, Horrible Bosses, Office Space.

books Sometimes some Stephen King, and sometimes maynbe even Charles Bukowski. Also just finished up The Hobbit, The Ocean At The End of the Lane and American Gods

music Watsky, Step Dad, Dishwalla, Korn, 311, Switchfoot, Tonic, Incubus , 12 Stones. Honestly I have a wide preference for music.

shows Workaholics, Cosmos, Walking Dead, Tosh.0.

food Chinese, Thai, Mexican, Italian. The hotter and spicier the better. I have a shaker of Trinidad Scorpion Pepper if that gives you an idea.
The six things I could never do without
Gummi Candy
My Smartphone
Good Beer from a Local Brewery
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Our first date. Well why wouldn't I since you are so cool.

We could hang out and watch a movie. My last date watched my most favorite scary movie. Went well except she then couldnt sleep that night and ended up not going to work the next day. I warned her.

So I'm thinking a coffee house might be better. That way if you arent interested (It happens, well to other people) then you can look over my shoulder and fantasize about the taller blonde dude behind me sipping on his expresso while he makes videos on his new Mac Book.
On a typical Friday night I am
Practicing Telekinesis. Not really. Lately my Friday nights are um, different.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I can rub my chin and instantly get the hiccups. Really. I can't make this up.
I’m looking for
  • Girls who like guys
  • Ages 22–46
  • Located anywhere
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating
You should message me if
You havent been abducted by aliens.
Don't see dead people.
You enjoy sarcasm/humor because if you are serious all the time, I'm fairly sure I will annoy you.
You are at least semi in shape.