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35 Los Angeles, CA Man


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I’m looking for

  • Women
  • Ages 25–35
  • Near me
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating

My details

Last online
Sep 2
6′ 2″ (1.88m)
Body Type
Mostly vegetarian
Atheism, and laughing about it
Graduated from university
Likes dogs and likes cats
English (Fluently), Spanish (Okay)
My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
Like the old song goes, "I was born and raised in southern California." At least I think there's a song like that. Maybe not. Anyway,
I've done a lot of thinking and although I am a native Californian I have come to think of California as a hotel, a hotel located on a dark desert highway. There's plenty of room at this "hotel" California. The funny thing, though, is that you can check out anytime you like, but you can never really leave. Think about it.

(I also have this whole other theory about how thunder only happens when its raining, but I won't get into it here. )

Also, both Myers and Briggs told me to "get a life." Briggs, I wasn't surprised. But Myers??!
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
Trying to raise an army of godless socialists from the smoldering ashes of public education (ie teaching history at an inner-city high school.) I surrender to the siren song of the desert whenever I can, or strum a spanish guitar while wand'ring thru the fields, or perch atop cliffs overlooking a violent shore. I like to do shit.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
I'm really good at tripping while walking and making it look like i totally meant to trip because i totally did

I'm also really good at forcing my houseplants to question why they continue to exist
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I've been told I look like the Indian guy on 'Heroes', or 'Lost', or 'Parks and Rec' or 'Portlandia' or whoever the Indian-du-jour is on TV. And one of my students just told me that I look like the Indian guy on some cartoon which is great because now I look like a cartoon. However, I think the first thing people usually notice about me is that I am not a cartoon.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
I just finished Pale Fire so now I'm not sure I'll ever be able to enjoy another book again. Uncle Vlad, you butterfly-fetishising madman, you've done it again! I'm also researching self-inflicted traumatic brain injuries so that I may experience Master and Margarita for the first time again. And as per the okcupid user agreement I am legally obligated to write "Murakami" in this section.

According to Netflix, I like the following genres: Mind Bending Foreign Dramas, Classic Emotional Romantic Movies, Cerebral Business Social & Cultural Documentaries, Understated TV Shows, Gritty Independent Movies, Visually Striking Movies, and Because You Watched Black Mirror.

TV shows - I watch a lot of this "golden age of television," by which I mean Golden Girls.

Music - pre-war blues, post-war jazz, late-50's rocknroll, 50's-60's Mexican boleros, early-60's rocksteady, mid-60's garage, late-60's chamber pop, 60's-70's soul and afrofunk, mid-70's krautrock, 70's-era troubadours, late 70's psychrock, early 80's post-punk, early tropicalia, authentic fado, anatolian rock, dreamboat dreampop, radio goo goo, malay ly-lite, and other pretentious bullshit that may not actually exist. Oh and Jonathan Richman.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
blah blah blah blah blah Mexican food
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
what other guys' profiles look like, because according to you ladies its all incorrect spelling, shirtless shots, photos with other girls, and rampant misuse of "there/they're/their."
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
lying in a pool of blood. Oh but don't worry, its not my blood
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I go to museums alone and the people there look at me funny; not because I'm alone, but because I'm naked.
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
- you know a language you can teach me (NO, ESPERANTO DOES NOT COUNT STOP MESSAGING ME),
- you want to have serious discussions about comedy,
- Your "Enemies List" only has one name: Will Shortz,
- you want to go a-travelin',
- you don't have a personalized license plate,
- you can tolerate the psychological disorder that causes people to interject Simpsons quotes despite having little to no relevancy in the conversation
- "Don't you hate pants?" - Homer Simpson
- sarcasm does not offend you,
- you can pitch a tent by campfire light while drunk. Like reeeeeally drunk.
- you understand that I was joking about the pool of blood. (Although, if you did not realize I was joking then you probably wouldn't message me anyway...unless you're into pools of which case you shouldn't message me.)