Find better matches with our advanced
matching system

—% Match
—% Enemy

hcjordan

31 M Portland, OR

I’m looking for

  • Women who like men
  • Ages 20–50
  • Near me
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating, casual sex

My Details

Last Online
Oct 23
Orientation
Straight
Ethnicity
White
Height
6′ 2″ (1.88m)
Body Type
Average
Diet
Mostly anything
Smokes
Sometimes
Drinks
Socially
Drugs
Sometimes
Religion
Agnosticism, and laughing about it
Sign
Cancer, but it doesn’t matter
Education
Graduated from university
Job
Entertainment / Media
Income
Relationship Status
Married
Relationship Type
Mostly non-monogamous
Offspring
Has a kid, but doesn’t want more
Pets
Has dogs and likes cats
Speaks
English (Fluently), Latin (Poorly), Spanish (Poorly), Sign Language (Poorly)

Similar Users

My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
I'm just this guy, you know? Odd, mellow, green, open-minded, and others. I'm kinky. I had to come out to my mom, accidentally, that was NOT FUN. I try to live a fairly active work life that makes exercise less than important. I'm usually happy with where I am in life and where I'm going. I'm personable and friendly. I don't really talk well to new people, but I'll almost always listen--if I can.

I'm not really that great at describing anyone. Including myself.

I'm a member of DamnPortlanders, good times.

I am open, honest, and weird.

I'm not looking for a new SERIOUS RELATIONSHIP, but I'm also not remotely into one-night-stands. There generally has be a connection, a friendship before you're likely get much romantic or sexual attention from me. On the other hand, I do love being groped and molested. I enjoy it very much and have not needed to stop someone yet.
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
I recently picked up a Nintendo 3DS. I'm playing Smash Bros., and I'm surprisingly into Mii Plaza streetpass games. My code is 4141-4324-4889.

I do a lot of different things in my professional life at any given time. First and foremost, I'm currently being a stay at home dad. My partner works full time and makes more on average than I would make in my primary line of work. I'm a theatre technician. I do stage union work as well as work for a number of other theatres, large and small. I have done production management for an amazing nonprofit theatre company doing a Christmas show. Basically any other Christmas show, I wouldn't be excited to do it.

I have a BFA in technical theatre lighting design, but I mostly use the knowledge to do general tech work. I love lighting most of all, but as a stagehand, I do some of everything. I have done apartment maintenance work and furnace repair/installation, but I am doing neither of those things right now.

I lived in Richmond, VA for a long time and now live within Portland city limits in the Mall 205 area.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
I'm pretty damn good at screwing around, it would seem. I can waste amazing amounts of time.

I'm good at organization and taking things in stride. I do electrical stuff and I like figuring things out. I have welded. I can do Vectorworks.

Relationshipwise, I like serving others, but I don't know if I would be good at it. I like giving foot rubs and other massages.
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
It used to be my rainbow hair. At the time of this writing, it's teal, heavy on the blue. People sometimes say I have Guy Fawkes facial hair. Due to my line of work, I'm often dressed in blacks and have my multitool at my side. I'm tall, but not awe-inspiringly so.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
I pick A.

I actually am not as cultured as I'd like to be. I used to read all the freaking time, but I don't really have much time anymore. I love me some Tales of MU, Stephen Hawking, Neil Gaiman, Stephen King, Ray Bradbury, Terry Pratchett, and Douglas Adams. I like science, humour, comics, fantasy, sci-fi, and many others.

I read webcomics. Quite a lot of them, really. I'm sorry. Some of my favorites I can remember offhand are Girl Genius, Mushroom Go, Goblins, Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal, A Girl and her Fed, Least I Could Do, Looking for Group, XKCD, Order of the Stick, Something Positive, and Perry Bible Fellowship. I loved Freakangels and Domenic Deegan..

I don't really watch movies or TV much. I DO like movies such as Secretary, May, Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind, Moulin Rouge, Dr. Who, et cetera.

Music is a weird thing for me. I don't listen to music very well. It only ever turns into background sound for me. That being said . . . Incubus, Jim's Big Ego, Stephen Lynch, Rammstein, Korn, show tunes, et cetera.

I like food. Macaroni and cheese, green olives, beef jerkey, sushi, lobster, artichokes, cob corn, and strawberries, among other things. I used to think I didn't like chocolate especially well, but then I had good chocolate. Turns out, I'm a chocolate snob. I don't like mint, nuts, peanuts, coconut, or bell peppers.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
Kink/sex energy, friends, love, pants with enough pocketspace to carry all of my pocketstuff. I can do without smoking certain things, but it's not preferable. At this moment, I'm actually a temporary teetotaler, with the exception of prescription meds. I'm even avoiding caffeine.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
Becoming a father. The shortest path between two points. Worrying I don't make a good friend. The darker side of sex. How attractive some people's boots are.
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
On the computer or at the theatre. I'm a lost cause. Help!
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I already admitted to kinkiness. What more do you want? I generally identify as a bottom/sub, but my position isn't set in stone. You get bonus points if you can find me on Fetlife.

I probably enjoy the Naked Bike Ride on a different level than I'm supposed to-one that in fact may make it illegal for me to be naked in public by Oregon law. Oh well. Do you partake in the WNBR?

I'm a compersive pervert in an open relationship.
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
My house is on fire, my children are burning, this cheeto you found reminds you of me, you can offer me work, you want to hang out sometime, you want to check out my succulent garden, you'd like to further examine my pervitude, or you just want to chat. I'm a pretty open person.