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33 M Grand Rapids, OH

My Details

Last Online
Today – 5:39am
6′ 4″ (1.93m)
Body Type
Graduated from university
Science / Engineering
Relationship Status
Relationship Type
Has kids
Has dogs and likes cats
English (Fluently), Spanish (Okay), Sign Language (Poorly), Latin (Poorly)

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My self-summary
Since I'm off the market, I've decided to use my self summary to offer some advice to the women. Think of me like a big brother helping out. These are things that your average guy will think and it doesn't make them true, but perception is often reality!

Pictures (only if you have more than 2 pictures)
1. If you're not smiling in any of your pictures, guys will think that you're evil and bitchy.
2. If you're alone in every single picture, A) you're not fun B) you don't have friends and you will be clingy. (PS - It's ok to blur or crop out the other people, as long as it's obvious you're not alone)
3. Don't load bad pictures of yourself on here. Remember that this is not Facebook, YOU chose to load YOUR pictures.
4. If your pictures come from a camera where the date is shown, make sure none of your pics are more than 2 years old or people will assume you're hiding something.
5. If you have pictures showing off your cleavage, you're asking guys to look at it and they might comment on it. Remember #4.
6. And please do NOT have pictures of your kids with you on an adult dating website...

1. Never mention that you've made some mistakes in the past or that you're healing now and ready to get back out there... all you're doing is letting the predators know that you're the slow gazelle and they should run you for a little bit and then pounce.
2. If you put a warning in your profile that you're not on here just for sex then you're telling sleezy guys they have a shot at nailing you if they lie really well.
3. If your requirements for a guy are no drugs, most of his teeth and not living with his parents then you're shooting too low. Feel free to list some dealbreakers but jeez, aim a bit higher.
4. If any of your paragraphs are more than 5 sentences long, guys aren't going to read them.
5. Don't be subtle. Guys are visual and stupid. Be extremely clear in everything you say.
6. Don't say you're looking to be friends first when you're really looking for a boyfriend. You're asking guys to lie to you and pretend to be your friend so they can try to get in your pants. The men that you want to attract will skip you since they think you're only looking to be friends (see #5).
What I’m doing with my life
I've been crazy busy recently, all good things though! Every now and then I try to squeeze in some time to go for a jog or just stroll through the woods and slow down to enjoy nature.
I’m really good at
I am a really good cook!
The first things people usually notice about me
People always notice that I'm smiling, mainly because I do it all the time. The world is my playground and I enjoy the hell out of it.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Most Stephen King, Battlefield Earth, any poem by Robert Frost, anything by R.A. Salvatore, Have a Nice Day, The Drawing of the Three, The Legend of Huma, One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest, Jason Cosmo, Homeland, The Host & the Harry Potter series. I don't read as often as I used to but I still read quite a bit.

I like all horror movies (but not the torture ones). Actually I like just about every type of movie. Some favs: Aliens, The Princess Bride, Dumb&Dumber, Ghostbusters, Edward Scissorhands, Newsies, The Good Son, Flashdance, The Dark Knight, Shaun of the Dead, Nightmare Before Christmas, Christmas Vacation, Fight Club, Bandslam, Enter the Dragon, The Green Mile & Warm Bodies to name a few!

I also tend to like some not so typical movies but I don't make other people watch them :) UHF, Moonwalker, Dead Alive, Dark City, Sleep Dealer, Donnie Darko, Special (Rx)

I really don't watch TV on a regular basis, but I do enjoy it. My favorite is Antiques Roadshow. Seriously.

I love all music (especially 80s music) but depends on my mood for what I want to listen to... I honestly like just about everything. My absolute favorite song ever is Red Red Wine by UB40, I always crank the volume up when it comes on the radio!

Chocolate!!! Addicted and ok with it
The six things I could never do without
Laughter, money, family, friends, sex, learning (about people, about things)
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Other people... I can read people really well, so I'm pretty social!
On a typical Friday night I am
Chillin' out maxin', relaxin' all cool - come on you know the words :)
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I've never been able to clap to a rhythm... back when I was a waiter they actually banned me from clapping during the Happy Birthday song and made me hold the cake... I can dance and I used to play an instrument, so I'm not sure why I'm clappingly challenged.

And... under the education section is the choice Space Camp... I did actually go to Space Camp!
I’m looking for
  • Straight girls only
  • Ages 25–55
  • Near me
  • For new friends
You should message me if
You want to say hi. Or if you have something to say that's more in depth than hi. Or if you want to comment on my photos! Don't worry I'm uber friendly. Ha ha ha... uber