Find better matches with our advanced
matching system

—% Match
—% Enemy


29 Durham, NC Woman


I’m looking for

  • Men
  • Ages 18–29
  • Near me
  • Who are single
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating

My Details

Last Online
Mar 20, 2013
5′ 4″ (1.63m)
Body Type
Mostly anything
Other, and somewhat serious about it
Gemini, and it’s fun to think about
Dropped out of university
Rather not say
Less than $20,000
Relationship Status
Relationship Type
Might want kids
Likes dogs and has cats
English (Fluently), C++ (Okay), Latin (Poorly)

Similar Users

My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
...I'm coming back to edit this later, so my profile is very much a work in progress...

I'm 27 (I'll be 28 in June), female, but not overly "girly." I'm not a tomboy, but I have some interests that aren't congruent with gender norms... I used to program computers (I was the only female in my school to take AP Computer Science back in 2001-2002), I like violent movies (though I'm not a violent person), and used to be into video games.

Just a warning: I list many Japanese-related things on my profile. I'm not obsessed with Japanese culture, but there are some series I *love*. There are some Western series on par, but there's simply more of what I'm interested in from that region and, as I list below, the titles were more accessible.

I may eventually post pictures, but I prefer to be quasi-anonymous because I don't want certain information to be out as public knowledge. I think it'd be awkward for most of my Facebook network to know that I like guys who like guys (ESPECIALLY my old church friends!). I'm fine with the fact that men may pass over me because I don't have a picture, but I'm not searching for a hookup. (I guess someone could assume that "friends" is a euphemism for "friends with benefits", but that isn't my intention.)

I've been somewhat "antisocial" since moving back to NC, but want to get back to dealing with others in person... or use OKC to get to know people if/when I move.
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
Lately, I've been in a bit of a routine. I work on earning points toward gift cards throughout the day, by doing background tasks. (I make a little over $50/month, which isn't much, but I view it like a game and try to have fun with it. I'm not here for referrals, but I can give you one if you're curious.)

I also spend mornings looking for free (Amazon) Kindle eBooks. I've collected tens of thousands of varying quality, almost all non-fiction. I guess I'm a digital hoarder, but over 99% are on the cloud, so I view it as amassing a personal digital library. I mostly keep the books for reference. I don't plan on reading many of them because my "to read list" is already rather long (and at this point, filled mostly with graphic novels/manga/manhwa/manhua).

I used to listen to audiobooks while online, but I tend to zone out and will need to rewind to re-listen. Also, I tend to have the television on in the background so that I can watch (and delete) shows and movies from my DVR. I will watch some movies or television programs without distractions, but there aren't many that are worth m full attention.

Also, throughout the day, I've been experimenting with teas. (That is NOT code for some sort of drugs.) I decided to ditch soda and swap it for tea. I'm not a tea snob by any means and I figure that spending $3 for 20 bags isn't too bad, even if I don't like the flavor. I've found some stunning flavors in "cheap" brands, but have also imported a few English teas. (I've also found that some teas are great for making flavored iced teas without need of sugar. I'm happy to have something that isn't basically diabetes in a glass. The standard in North Carolina is to practically turn tea into a syrup by the amount of sugar added. Craziness!)

I also adore GOOD coffee (and it can give me a sense of well-being and warm, cozy peace), but I'm trying to focus on teas at the moment because I can make them cup-by-cup.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
* making "cherry Coke" (called Roy Rogers)
* solving sudoku puzzles
* untangling knots
* saving money/living frugally (without coupons)
* not being bored (ESPECIALLY if I have a computer and internet access)
* providing "tech support" for my friends (basic stuff, mostly)
* totally geeking out over things I like
* getting along with cats and dogs
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
* my appearance (...this is obvious)
* that I talk... a LOT
* that I (apparently) have a "Canadian" accent
* that I (sometimes) shake. I tend to have low blood sugar, so if I haven't eaten recently, I may be shaky or even light-headed.
* that I have a thing for ellipses in writing.
* that I need to qualify most of what I say. I prefer to explain myself, in part because I've had to deal with a lot of misconceptions over the years (mostly stemming from my sexual orientation and gender identity).
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
For anime/manga-related items, you can PM me and I can send you to my MyAnimeList profile. (Be forewarned that I enjoy BL/yaoi/shounen ai, but I've tried to label such titles. I won't force you to watch/read 2-D guy-on-guy action. I find the genre interesting/amusing, but am not *obsessed* like the stereotypes.)

I may later sort these into Eastern and Western. I've mentioned more Asian titles (primarily Japanese) because I have documented most of what I've watched in the past 2 years on MyAnimeList and MangaUpdates. I'm still looking for an equivalent site to keep track of movies and tv shows and (ideally) even books.

BOOKS: **incomplete** nonfiction (the genre in general, specifically educational, business, or epidemilogic... boring to most, intriguing to me), Koi Suru Boukun (The Tyrant Falls in Love), Zetsuai/Bronze: Zetsuai since 1989 (rock star + star soccer player = gay drama!), yaoi doujinshi galore!

MOVIES: **incomplete** I like silent films, horror, independent films, and "b movies". A few movies that come to mind: Sunrise: A Tale of Two Humans, Top Hat (Fred Astaire/Ginger Rogers), The Gay Divorcee (another Fred Astaire/Ginger Rogers picture... has nothing to do with homosexuality), Pi, Akira (ground-breaking classic anime... the manga's on my "to read" list), Princess Mononoke (a.k.a. Mononoke Hime), Howl's Moving Castle (Howl no Ugoku Shiro), Disney's Robin Hood, Vampire Hunter D/Vampire Hunter D: Bloodlust, Devilman OVAs (the live-action movie was ok), Ai no Kusabi OVAs (sci-fi yaoi), Black Jack movie & OVAs (the 12-part series), Xiao Qian (in Cantonese), SAW series, The Crow series, Zombieland, Rise of the Zombies (LeVar Burton was great in this!)

SHOWS: **incomplete** The Big Bang Theory, The Walking Dead, Judge Judy (guilty pleasure!), Doomsday Preppers (I enjoy "zombie apocalypse" scenarios for the fun of it, but don't take it seriously), Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson, Darker Than Black (anime, season 1), Black Jack/Black Jack 21 (anime, which I find more enjoyable than the American live-action "House"), Gravitation (anime shounen ai, but generally considered "yaoi"), Junjou Romantica (anime, yaoi), Kuroshitsuji (a.k.a. Black Butler... the Japanese voice acting is worlds better), Code Geass (the subtitled Japanese version... the American voice acting was so bad, I avoided the series for *years* after hearing a few minutes of the English dub on Adult Swim), Detroit Metal City (anime, though I've also seen the live-action movie), Batman: The Animated Series (I haven't seen the newer versions, but Batman: The Animated series is still AMAZING 20 years later!), Cowboy Bebop (the first modern anime I saw... and it was revolutionary!), Hetalia (the dub is FANTASTIC!), Tiger & Bunny (one of my favorites! I imported some doujinshi and figures from Japan, but don't read Japanese... I love, love, LOVE this series!), Cantonese dub of Cooking Master Boy (Chuuka Ichiban!), Sukisho (shounen ai mystery series), Blue Literature (Aoi Bungaku Series)

MUSIC: (coming soon!) -- mostly '80s to '90s and obscure/independent music.

FOOD: Italian, Chinese, Mexican. What I eat depends on what I'm in the mood for. I'm somewhat picky about what I eat and have some dietary restrictions (due to health concerns), so if I'm at an unfamiliar restaurant, it may take a while for me to decide what I want to order.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
I'm including "essentials" (such as food, air, water, shelter, etc.) as given.

1. my computer and internet access (it's not just for piracy!), along with my highly-customized internet browsers (I prefer Firefox and Flock), VLC (video client), uTorrent (bittorrent client), and more programs (I don't feel like going through all of them here, but I'd be glad to geek out if you feel like discussing computer stuff) ...I could live without internet (I've managed to do so multiple times, for months at a time, when I was living with my aunt or uncle out of state)

2. my credit card. I've adjusted my lifestyle so that I spent within my means (rather than going into debt). I only have one card (it has a 5-figure credit limit), but I make use of it every opportunity I can (when purchasing something I'd be paying for regardless) because of the consumer protections, the small amount of cashback, and the ability to have a one or two month "float" on my money. I suppose I should say that credit belongs here as well. I prefer savers over spenders, but I have my splurges.

3. satellite/DVR (and attached television)

4. privacy/"alone time" (dealing with others 24/7/365 is stressful)

5. intellectual pursuits (this includes reading nonfiction)

6. creative outlets (though they aren't always conventional) ...I'm going to include body modification here, as it's a form of self-expression. I *used to* have 14mm+ ear lobes (with Starry Night plugs), but I let them shrink. They aren't back to the original size, but I'd guess they're around 8g. They don't look that bad now and are generally covered by my hair. I'm thinking of re-stretching them and getting some Batman plugs. (I started stretching with the goal of 1/2" Batman tunnels, but I fell in love with the van Gogh plugs and *had to* stretch to my goal size.)

I also enjoy singing along to (or over) songs. If I'm alone, I'll search the radio for something I know. If I'm at my computer, I have quite a few songs to choose from. I typically don't feel comfortable singing in front of those I know. Oddly enough, if I don't care about someone's opinion of me (a total stranger), I can belt out in a confident voice. I'm a bit of a wuss and my voice is out of practice, but I feel that I'm not half-bad. :P
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
what I'd do in a zombie apocalypse... I don't think it'll come to that, but it's fun to view the world in an ongoing "game" of "how would I survive THIS?" (much like "how could a ninja use items in this room to KILL someone?")
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
...probably on my computer and/or watching TV (from my DVR so I can skip through commercials). If I'm AFK, I'm likely sleeping. (My schedule shifts due to insomnia. I prefer to be up through the night and sleep during the day.)
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
The most private thing I'm willing to admit are my health issues. I am willing to "admit" more after getting to know and trust someone.

I'm mildly "stuck" in my life at the moment due to my health. I was diagnosed with Hashimoto's Thyroiditis, which is an autoimmune form of hypothyroidism where my thyroid basically acts bipolar. (I fluctuate between hyperthyroidism and hypothyroidism. My hyperthyroidism was actually still in the low normal to normal range, which indicates that my thyroid has burned itself out over the years.) I'm on thyroid hormone replacement therapy. I still have symptoms, so I'm also "subclinical". (I'm mostly dealing with tiredness, cold extremities, and pain.)

I also have fibromyalgia. I dislike massages because they HURT me. I'm taking pain medication and mega-dosing Omega-3 (in the form of fish oil), which is relatively effective, but I still wake up feeling like I've been hit by a truck. I also have dizziness and water retention side effects from my medication, but at least I can sit down with relatively little pain.

I have arthritis in my knees and shoulders. I used to be able to give 300+ lb guys piggyback rides before my health took a nosedive, but it's the autoimmune disease (and related inflammation) that's causing the arthritis. I miss my weightlifting. I was proud to be stronger than most of the guys I dated.

I also have insomnia issues, but who doesn't?
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
You should message me if you'd like to talk about something I've written up here or if you'd like to hang out (in person) at some point. I'm willing to hang out with women, but tend to get along better with men. I tend to get along with trans* people and have had a few long-term relationships with non-op transwomen (MtF), but I'm not actively seeking one out with this go around. (It's awkward to explain that I view myself as heterosexual without hurting my partner's feelings.)

I haven't dated a Republican yet, so I'm curious how that would go. (I tend to go for Libertarians, though have attracted and been attracted to communists and socialists in the past... weird!)

I prefer to avoid smokers (I like cigars and flavored cigarettes, but I rarely smoke... I'm trying to avoid those who are dependent on alcohol, tobacco, and other substances... sans caffeine. Caffeine's awesome! I don't get much nowadays, but as long as you don't turn into a horrible person without it, go for it!)

I haven't experimented with marijuana yet, but would be open to it in the future. I lived in a state with MMJ laws and now it's "legal" to use there recreationally (though it's still against federal laws). I'm curious for spiritual reasons, but that's secondary to medical reasons (fibromyalgia, anxiety, and *possibly* to treat my autoimmune disease). I dislike the scent of marijuana and wouldn't want to be stoned, but if it can help me live life more fully, I'd like to give it a try.