Prepare to judge harshly:
There's a fine line between making myself appear more interesting than I actually am by listing all of my many, many accolades (I have 2 1/2) and boring the unsuspecting reader into a coma, so I'll just keep it simple:
I'm not a morning person. Frisbees confound me. I like cooking shows, but I don't know why. Total strangers have taken to calling me "Slim" in the past. I have trouble controlling my facial expressions (despite practicing in front of a mirror), but I've been told I have a great poker face. If you spend much time around me you'll find that my wry, sarcastic demeanor conceals a more thoughtful side. Also, I'm not as smart as I look.
I think it's important to try to find the humor in life and not take yourself too seriously, but I also place a very high value on loyalty and dependability in myself and others. When I'm not working or doing one-armed pushups, I like learning new things, being outdoors, exercising, discussing various topics, contingency planning for highly unlikely scenarios, and appreciating the simple things in life - like cliches in dating profiles.
I'm a bit a geek at times, although hopefully one of the more subtle, charming variety. I enjoy discovering new music (then feeling superior about it) and watching movies of all genres, both foreign and domestic. Netflix has given up trying to provide recommendations for me, apparently. I'm really just intrigued by pop culture in general.
My goal in this is to find someone I respect and can be totally genuine and comfortable with, free of all this pretense. Someone to tell me I'm pretty, even when I don't feel like it. ;-)
It's important that we're able to have fun, regardless of what we are doing, whether exploring an exotic locale or cooking a meal together and making fun of reality TV (or something equally mundane). If we're not able to sit together in the same room without being bored or uncomfortable, there's a problem. And I will scream...when you least expect it.
I don't want to put a tired list of requirements on here, but since everyone else is:
I'm not interested in manipulators, serial daters, or serial killers, although if I had to choose, I would pick the former two. ...Although if you're really any good at what you do, I guess I won't know until it's too late...
Also, if you're just going to send me a message that says, "hey sexy" or "nice rack", then don't bother. I've heard it all before. :-)
(Well, some woman did yell, "YOU'RE HOT" at me from a moving car that one time in a Best Buy parking lot....)
Apparently someone saw fit to plagiarize portions of my profile. I'm not sure how I feel about that, but I guess I must be doing something right.