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huisclos22

29 F New York, NY

My Details

Last Online
Today – 2:05pm
Orientation
Straight
Ethnicity
White
Height
5′ 7″ (1.71m)
Body Type
Thin
Diet
Mostly anything
Smokes
No
Drinks
Rarely
Drugs
Religion
Sign
Capricorn
Education
Graduated from law school
Job
Law
Income
Relationship Status
Single
Relationship Type
Offspring
Doesn’t have kids, but might want them
Pets
Likes dogs
Speaks
English

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My self-summary
Just a stew of points in no particular order:

(1) I'm trying to avoid dying alone amongst an army of amassed cats;

(2) I'm allergic to cats;

(3) I hate dating but I know I have to do it if I don't want to die alone amongst cats (see above);

(4) I don't want no scrubs;

(5) I love my job and I wish I could marry it;

(6) I'm a real cunt before my morning coffee;

(7) In an ideal world I would have 7 dogs and name them after the deadly sins;

(8) Guys become 100 times more attractive to me if they are chivalrous and shower me with affections (I get bored quickly with hard-to-get);

(9) (Reserved)

(10) Where the fuck is my Prince Charming? Disney promised.
I’m really good at
Filling the void your mother left.

Making people feel good about themselves.

Being attentive and sympathetic.

Divorcing people.

Symbolic logic.
The first things people usually notice about me
I'm only guessing, since I've never empirically experienced a first impression of myself, but upon information and belief, I submit the following:

Thing The First: My Irish-vampiric youthfulness and pallor.

Thing The Second: That I smile much more in person than in my photos.

Thing The Third: How much I play with my hair.
The six things I could never do without
Puppies
Human Touch
Black Eyeliner
Serotonin
An escape plan
LOLing
I spend a lot of time thinking about
How faithfully my 6th grade mantra, "girls rule boys drool," has withstood the sands of time.

Human suffering.

Interpersonal relationships.

The nuances that make people beautiful.

Causes of action.

Crisp bacon.

"Ghosting" culture.

Today's Thought: How Jason Derulo and the Pokemon are the only two entities that walk around singing their own name all the time.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
A guy once text-message-dumped me on the grounds that he needed to dovote all his free time to God. (It's not you ... It's Him).

I'm a total daddy's girl; in fact, my name is a variation on the theme (extra points if you solve this riddle). We dork out about legal issues during weekly phone calls.

I dated a D-list celebrity. You probably don't know him.

I eat gummy vitamins.

I don't think I'm as hot as you think I think I am.
I’m looking for
  • Guys who like girls
  • Ages 25–34
  • Near me
  • Who are single
  • For long-term dating
You should message me if
You're secure enough in your manhood to date an Alpha Female (apparently I can be pretty intense).

You use cologne and scented deodorant (I promise to fall in love at first smell.)

You're not too hairy. This is actually really important.

You can explain to me wtf LOST was about.