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31 Los Angeles, CA Man


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I’m looking for

  • Women
  • Ages 22-35
  • Near me
  • For long-term dating, short-term dating, casual sex

My details

Last online
Apr 11
Relationship Type
Mostly monogamous
5' 9" (1.75m)
Body Type
Agnosticism and laughing about it
Post grad
Doesn’t have kids but wants them
English (Fluently), Spanish (Somewhat), German (Somewhat), Japanese (Somewhat)
My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
Some dating advice given to me by a female friend:

"Always go with: my sister -- the chemist who worked at a dildo factory -- thinks I'm a real catch."

...because there is nothing less awkward to start a conversation with than connecting dildos with family. Ninety percent of the time its a razor, anyway.

I am seriously not cut out for online dating.
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
I have a Ph. D.
In chemistry.

Beat that, ya bunch'a braggarts!
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
You can get at least pretty good at almost anything you dedicate your mind and energy towards. I seem to recall Malcolm Gladwell making a bit of a stink about that (aside: I'm not a fan. I mean... he gave a TED talk. *shudder*).

I tear things apart and fix them as a hobby.

Oh, and I can cook.
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
"You look like Harry Potter."

Fuck you, no I don't!
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
Books: Anything that was written before I was born.

Movies: zombies. anything from the 70's. I secretly cry at romantic comedies. Don't judge.

TV: that's still a thing? Does Game of Thrones count?

Music: Sometimes I dance in the grocery store.
I love me some Hall & Oates. And Stevie Wonder. Also... lots of random indie.

Food: meat, cheese, beer and coffee
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
oxygen, carbon, hydrogen, nitrogen, calcium, and phosphorus (in order of percent by mass)

Is this supposed to be ironic?
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
I get very excited when the time in the clock reads either 1:28, 2:56, 5:12, or 10:24.

My excitement, however, does not double. It's capped at 1/32 of that in firmware.


I also find myself wondering a lot: "is this a story that I'll tell my children? Wait, will I have children? Huh, how old am I again? Phew, ok, cool, there's still time."
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
saying insane things to people I met randomly. It's an under-rated hobby.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I grew up near a dairy farm. To this day, the smell of cow shit makes me think of ice cream. This is more useful than it might sound.
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
I like women who were boots instead of heels.

Raging alcoholics preferred. Depressive alcoholics acceptable.

Most of the people with a high match percentage with me have profiles that actually make them sound kinda like jerks. The self-same implications of that are practically too uncomfortable for me to contemplate.

But, anyways, I never really know what to write in this section.

(Dictated but not read)