I learned how to meditate when I was 21 years old, and that has been the biggest turning point in my life thus far. When meditation just happened to me, I found that I could finally feel self-confidence about who I was. Needless to say, I felt relieved to the core of my being. Once I discovered that I could consciously be in a place of peace and ease, a place where I was unfolding and unraveling, all I wanted to do was be in that place. I became driven about feeling present, because really being present felt like my only salvation.

So, my next big thing was finding bodytalk and being healed by a bodytalk practioner. I found bodytalk when I was 23, and even though I could meditate it helped me become aware of so much more about myself.

Bodytalk is a form of energy medicine and a very powerful healing technique. I immensely look forward to the regular bodytalk sessions that I get. They are the highlight of any week. I treasure all the realizations that I have had as a result of this work. I have reached a deeper level of happiness then I could have reached on my own.

Some keywords that relate to my lifestyle: eco conscious, environmentally friendly, awareness, intentional, spiritual, sustainable, sustainability, authenticity, spiritual awakening, centered, equanimity, mindful, earthships (a little something that inspires me), ecovillages (because it is nice to find ways to honor our inter-connectedness), empowered, and empowerment.

Some thoughts on being a good human: To be available to people not with your time but with your heart takes an openness, an acknowledgment of our human connection as equals. This openness creates a palpable space and is possible when the mind chooses not to accept or reject anything. This openness is the foundation of kindness, patience, and being humble. It makes me feel like a good human to offer this kind of space to another.

I am passionate, trustworthy, and honest

To me, living in this world is living with dysfunction. I know there is no reason to resent, complain, or make this truth personal. But I am confronted with the knowing that few have reached the level of consciousness or awareness it takes to remedy all the destruction we are causing.

So, I want to be of service and am working towards that end. Becoming an elementary school teacher is my goal, but I dislike much of the process. I think that the most important thing for kids to learn is how to meditate, but I know that this is something we have yet learned how to successfully teach in schools. So, I have to find a way to fit into this culture to make a livelihood. What keeps me going is knowing that I am meant to pursue this calling. The recognition alone does bring happiness, even while facing all the challenges. (And it is a challenge to know that many more people will have to awaken to themselves to embrace the simplicity of a different lifestyle. Inner awareness is the only real remedy to societies problems.)

I mostly enjoy walking and bike riding but I also occasionally go skiing, white water rafting, and rock climbing. I play a little guitar but do not consider myself a musician. I like to sing but do not consider myself a singer. I enjoy many things.

I am good at being a positive thinker, it was something that I had to learn. Positive thinking has its limitations but at the time I learned how to do it it represented a giant leap forward in my evolution, as I found I was no longer as depressed and full of judgments.

So much of what people look for only really reflects their own values and filters. Taking pause during a conversation to close my eyes and center myself can to some may be a sign that I am not being myself, maybe that I don't want to be myself around them. So there are many interpretations and often we let how other people view us merge with our own view of ourselves. This is a painful process that is ego driven and doesn't have anything to do with who we are.

I have been told that I have a small ego, that I haven't formed a lot of beliefs, and that I am present. But none of these thoughts should become part of my identity.

I usually prefer silence to music; I like the stillness of just being aware of my thoughts and my surroundings. When I do listen to music I like it to energize me---I like it when it celebrates life, when it is happy music. Krishna Das makes me happy. I like eating organic, whole foods. I read books like "The Power of Now" by Eckhart Tolle and anything by Byron Katie. I especially like movies that are true stories and documentaries that educate me. I recently saw "Food, Inc." and found it to be enlightening.

I have spent time out in the wilderness without a lot (i.e. heat, electricity, tv, etc.) and know that it can be quite liberating. I like being rugged with nothing but the essentials. It can make me feel alive to weather the elements. I feel like I get in touch with myself when things are stripped down to the bare necessities. I love the wilderness. What I don't want to live without is a healthy mind---that is why I find it so important to be present. When I am present it feels like my mind is healing. Once you've tasted that healing space I find you just want more of it.

I like to contemplate those things that bring me joy, usually things that help me to enlighten up. Recently, I have been contemplating some ancient Tibetan Buddhist teachings on happiness. Its called "The 16 Guidelines for Living a Happy and Meaningful Life." Finding spiritually alive material makes me happy.

I like finding events/info on people who are making this world a better place. I like entertainment that educates me. Most of the time, I am pretty frugile and take care to think about what to spend money on. I find that I live abundantly without a lot of money because I am only interested in healthy venues.

I came out of the closet as a lesbian when I was 17 years old. This is not a private thing. Private things should be a way of respecting the ego, not reinforcing it. Unfortunately, my sexual orientation felt like a secret, a way of feeling inferior. It wasn't until I went to an all women's college and stopped feeling like a minority, that I overcame my feelings of being alone. By being willing to share those things that would otherwise keep people's unconscious beliefs alive we reach deeper levels of honesty with ourselves. There is no such thing as gaydar so it now feels good to feel comfortable asking someone if they are gay.

Eventually I realized I was bisexual but I have a preference for women.

You should message me if you are interested and think that we have something in common. Feel free to email me, I like to chat with new people.

So that is the end of my profile. Below are some added thoughts that I just didn't feel like deleting.

I consider myself a peaceful person, someone who knows that living with an awareness of the ego, the false self, means that you have awakened to the problem of misidentification. For example, when you are aware of your ego you find serenity in allowing yourself to feel anger but not BE angry---knowing that not making your anger an identity brings peace. In a world dominated by the ego, I know that sometimes the only peace to be found is the peace that comes from inside.