I'm not looking for love, but I am rich, so if that helps. I'll totally lie to you about myself because I can afford to be an asshole. If your really hot I'll buy you gifts if I can do it in unmentionable places.
I am a really really good kisser. If you think I am telling a lie, just ask my mom. She will tell you just like she told me. Really great, with just the right amount of tongue.
I think I am looking for a woman that will make me dinner and cook and clean and take out the garbage and work and do the laundry and mow the yard on the house she already owns and take me to dinner at Waffle House and wear high heels to bed and be really like flexible and stuff and sweet but supernatural in the bedroom and likes to whistle and drink but not wet the bed.