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26 Seattle, WA Man


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I’m looking for

  • Women
  • Ages 19–28
  • Near me
  • Who are single
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating

My details

Last online
Yesterday – 7:44pm
6′ 3″ (1.91m)
Body type
Strictly anything
Graduated from university
Sales / Marketing
Doesn’t have kids
English, Spanish (Poorly), French (Poorly), Icelandic (Okay)
My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
Twerk team coach, amateur goat herder, aspiring super villain.

Creep my Twitter/Instagram to get a real time play by play of the mediocre but ridiculous life I attempt to live: @hitbycars
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
I'm usually sitting around in short shorts, eating pizza and drinking wine, or working 50 hours a week so I can afford more short shorts, wine, and pizza. And I try to spend as much time as I can hiding from the world in blanket forts
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
Burning bridges, both physically and metaphorically. My sass game is next level and my dance moves are so hot that they were banned by the Geneva convention during use in war
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I have antlers

Also I am tall. And I have tattoos. And I'm sassy as fuck
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
I spend 11 hours a day watching Space Jam

I have a book buying addiction. It's getting out of hand and ruining my life. My family put me in rehab but I broke out and am currently on the run
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
Cocaine and puppies and I can't bring myself to pretend I care about 4 more things
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
The volatile nature of human animalism contrasted and simultaneously juxtaposed with our self imposed civil standards of conduct.

And nice butts like lawd help meh if she got the booty fam
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
Masturbating to Spice World or robbing a liquor store
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I shot Tupac
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
If Wednesday Addams is your spirit animal