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idontdocupcakes

25 F Minneapolis, MN

My Details

Last Online
Aug 27
Orientation
Straight
Ethnicity
White
Height
5′ 5″ (1.65m)
Body Type
Average
Diet
Strictly anything
Smokes
No
Drinks
Socially
Drugs
Never
Religion
Agnosticism, but not too serious about it
Sign
Gemini, but it doesn’t matter
Education
Dropped out of university
Job
Other
Income
Relationship Status
Single
Relationship Type
Offspring
Doesn’t have kids, but wants them
Pets
Likes dogs and has cats
Speaks
English (Fluently), German (Poorly)

Similar Users

My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
***UPDATE*** New Jersey » upstate ny » new jersey » amish county pa » dc » dc suburb » BALTIMORE» Invading A City Near You

I bleed New Jersey. Southern hospitality makes me sick and the Left Coast isn't fast enough.
I'm starting to develop an intolerance to beards. But i will never tire of gnarly Lemmy Kilmeister style mutton chops.
Veganism is a deal-breaker.
Drugs are a deal-breaker
I probably looked at your profile if you have a mohawk regardless of where you live. Size does matter.
Zombies are boring. Everybody knows alien brain slugs are the future. (would you like hat?)

Actual responses from actual guys- not paid actors!
(and completely INNAPPROPRIATE. Just because we're online doesn't make any of this more acceptable.)
"You dont have to worry about my size I am prtty hunkkkkkkk and its acting up since I open your profile:)"
"Wow, you are so hot;) im visiting DC tomorrow, would you like to come over to my place for hang out and some fun tomorrow night?;)love your boobs;) "
"Have you ever worn the adidas samba shoes? They look cute on girls " (Note: Not Exactly Innappropriate But More Like 'really, Dude?')
"Oh my goodness! I just lost all of today's workout gains from sitting here sweating profusely and looking at your profile pictures. I hope you're happy, you are the sole cause behind the genocide of thousands of my unborn offspring. I think you at least owe me a protein shake or something. "
"Well don't you seem like a basket of dead roses? And what did cupcakes ever do to you? They are just sweet muffins. Who doesn't like muffins? And if you want to escape, just get on your vespa and ride out of town. "
"Can your pussy do the dog?"
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
saying Goodbye To My Honey, The City Of Baltimore
Going Out west..
We Should Hang Out When I Get There.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
packing My Truck Full Of Furniture.
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
septum Ring.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
Literary: ubik, phillip k. Dick; tartine bread, chad robertson; refresh refresh, benjamin percy;Samuel Johnson Is Indignant, Lydia Davis; Salt, Mark Kurlasky; Assorted nonfiction
Not so literary: jan svankmajer's alice; blue velvet; pan's labrynth; wir kinder zum banhof zoo; brave litttle toaster; factotum; pulp fiction; house of 1000 corpses; any documentary about black holes or cephalopods.
Finally Have A Tv, But I'm Only Watching Twin Peaks And Bob's Burgers.
Auditory: tom waits; the cramps; rev horton heat; sleater-kinney; xray spex; the adicts; mojo nixon; the replacements; babes in toyland; dead milkmen; wanda jackson; The raincoats; bratmobile; black lips; sonic youth; 2ma; detroit cobras (Fuck Off, I Don't Care That They're A Cover Band); Screaming Females; minutemen
Edible: black coffee; dark beer; steak tartar; tomatoes; Fermented things; funky cheeses; gin; crusty crunchy levain raised bread; red sauce; pork roll, Smoked fish, club N bitters; lentils; bagels; Persimmons; olive oiL; Yuengling!
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
Gravity, osmosis, aerobic respiration, a liver, shelter, amino acids
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
What Beating Someone With A Pipe Feels Like... Not Really (But Kinda)... Why Are You Slowly Backing Away From Me?
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
Plating desserts.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I will take over baltimore.
I’m looking for
  • Guys who like girls
  • Ages 24–34
  • Near me
  • Who are single
  • For new friends
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
You're In Need Of A PLATONIC Roommate.
Literate.
Employed.
A tattooed punk rock asshole.
Optional:
David Johansen Or Johnny Thunders?