I bleed New Jersey. Southern hospitality makes me sick and the Left Coast isn't fast enough.
I'm starting to develop an intolerance to beards. But i will never tire of gnarly Lemmy Kilmeister style mutton chops.
Veganism is a deal-breaker.
Drugs are a deal-breaker
I probably looked at your profile if you have a mohawk regardless of where you live. Size does matter.
Zombies are boring. Everybody knows alien brain slugs are the future. (would you like hat?)
Actual responses from actual guys- not paid actors!
(and completely INNAPPROPRIATE. Just because we're online doesn't make any of this more acceptable.)
"You dont have to worry about my size I am prtty hunkkkkkkk and its acting up since I open your profile:)"
"Wow, you are so hot;) im visiting DC tomorrow, would you like to come over to my place for hang out and some fun tomorrow night?;)love your boobs;) "
"Have you ever worn the adidas samba shoes? They look cute on girls " (Note: Not Exactly Innappropriate But More Like 'really, Dude?')
"Oh my goodness! I just lost all of today's workout gains from sitting here sweating profusely and looking at your profile pictures. I hope you're happy, you are the sole cause behind the genocide of thousands of my unborn offspring. I think you at least owe me a protein shake or something. "
"Well don't you seem like a basket of dead roses? And what did cupcakes ever do to you? They are just sweet muffins. Who doesn't like muffins? And if you want to escape, just get on your vespa and ride out of town. "
"Can your pussy do the dog?"