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29 Portland, OR Man


I’m looking for

  • Women
  • Ages 23–35
  • Near me
  • Who are single
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating

My details

Last online
Today – 9:53am
6′ 2″ (1.88m)
Body type
Strictly anything
Agnosticism, but not too serious about it
Gemini, but it doesn’t matter
Graduated from university
Sales / Marketing
Rather not say
Doesn’t have kids
Likes dogs and likes cats
English (Poorly)

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My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
My long-term goal is to have a foreboding mansion with its own hedge maze. On foggy afternoons, I will go perambulating in the hedge.

Intrepid visitors will knock on the door to my mansion. "Can I rent the hedge?" they will want to know, for a birthday party, wedding anniversary or business reception.

"Yes, as long as I may deliver my speech beforehand."

I will deliver my speech, about the illusory nature of wisdom, in a manner that seems extemporaneous. (It is not). At the end of the speech, I will go, "aha!", and vanish in an expanding cloud of smoke.

A little while later, I will reappear with cake.
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
Saving up to go on vacation. Always.

Also saving up to buy a house.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
Biking uphill
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
Literature: A Confederacy of Dunces (Toole), I Claudius (Graves), Wind Up Bird Chronicle (Murakami), Kon-Tiki (Heyerdahl), 2666 (Bolano), The Confessions of Nat Turner (Styron), most stuff by Mailer, Nabokov, West, Roth

Least favorite book: 1Q84. Why do so many of you like this book? It was almost unbearable.

Film: Billy Wilder, John Huston, Robert Altman, Alexander Payne, Coens, Scorsese, Hitchcock, Fincher, Star Trek IV: The Voyage Home, Terminator II: Judgment Day, The Act of Killing

Best thing I've seen recently: The Jinx

Music: Silver Jews, Radiohead, Neil Young, Jonathan Richman, Black Keys, Stravinsky, Tool, Santigold, Yeah Yeah Yeahs, classical, jazz, blues, live music shows, also a big big fan of embarrassing 90s alt rock and 80s new wave

TV: The Sopranos, The Wire, Mad Men, Breaking Bad, Curb Your Enthusiasm, Seinfeld, Top Chef, Bourdain stuff

Also love podcasts: This American Life, The World, Planet Money, A Way with Words, 99% Invisible, Stuff to Blow Your Mind
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
Soy sauce.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
They should gradually transform the Paul Newman face on various Newman's Own products into a skull.

Paul Newman --> decaying face --> skull

do women who love beards also love pubes? if not, why not?

who is the masculine corollary to Liz Lemon?
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
Cat --> Begins making sounds like he is about to vomit. Mitch --> Shepherds cat from carpeted floor to tile floor. Cat --> Seems like he is okay, may not vomit, meows for litter box to be cleaned. Mitch --> Begins cleaning litter box. Cat --> Slips away quietly and quickly throws up on Mitch's carpet.
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
- you enjoy laughing.
- you like trying new foods.
- you are Natalie Imbruglia (circa 1997).
- you want to talk about why Shakespeare is the smartest person on the list.
- you have good taste, but abhor snobbery.
- you want help with your fantasy baseball / football team.
- you're happy where you are now, and you're looking to meet someone who is happy where they are.
- you have an interesting historical factoid to share.
- you have a funny joke to share.
- you want to play chess
- idea for first date: I will bring a container of homemade mashed potatoes, you will bring a container of homemade mashed potatoes. There are no restrictions as to the type of mashed potatoes. Meet in a park, sample the mashed potatoes, rate the potatoes on a number of criteria.