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illspoken

37 San Francisco, CA Man

Man

I’m looking for

  • Everyone
  • Ages 28–55
  • Near me
  • For new friends, short-term dating, casual sex

My Details

Last Online
Online now!
Orientation
Bisexual
Ethnicity
White
Height
5′ 9″ (1.75m)
Body Type
Diet
Smokes
No
Drinks
Socially
Drugs
Sometimes
Religion
Atheism, and somewhat serious about it
Sign
Leo, but it doesn’t matter
Education
Dropped out of space camp
Job
Technology
Income
Relationship Status
Open relationship
Relationship Type
Offspring
Pets
Likes dogs and likes cats
Speaks
English (Fluently)

Similar Users

My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
Sweet queer poly geeky kinky feminist liberal overly verbose cynical optimist with a dirty and dark sense of humor and fever dreams of polymathy ISO... awesome people I haven't met yet, for surprising and delicious and hilarious interactions across the spectrum of possibilities. (This legitimately and honestly includes new friends -- I'm not interested in filtering and discarding neat individuals out of my life just because there's no mutual relationship chemistry.)

I consider 'there's no way to do that' a statement of challenge, not a concession to inevitability. I take sex both as intensely and as casually as it deserves. I don't like losing, but I try very hard to be gracious when I do. I've got a sadly limited vocal range, but that doesn't stop me from singing when the mood moves me. My pronunciation is irrevocably and curiously erroneous in amusing ways. I'm happiest when I've just made someone laugh -- the harder the better. My (white, male, financial) privilege is examined, and kept under recurring surveillance. I'll try almost anything once, and on zero notice if my schedule is free.

(As for the body type self-summary in the details sidebar, I prefer "stocky", but that's not an available option on the list, so it gets put here.)
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
Winging it, like most of us.

Fighting to keep work (it's tech stuff -- I can (and indeed, prefer) to talk about other things) from expanding to fill all available time. Plotting ways to go visit my brother and his wife in Kenya again, soon. Cultivating mindful awareness and personal kindness. Letting my creative urges get some focus for a while. Teaching myself new things. Practicing. Finally repairing my relationship with my body after years of contention and struggle.

Recently, I started a new entry in Notational Velocity: "What Do You Want, Michael?" I'm having fun putting things on it, and figuring out what order they should happen in.

I like to play this mental game: go back in time and tell the you from five years ago what's going on in your life now. If the previous you is (pleasantly) surprised and amazed and tickled (or at least disbelieving), you're doing it right.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
Systems analysis, ontology, copyediting, pattern recognition, making lists, flirting, introspection, making people laugh, arguing respectfully, footrubs, assimilating and summarizing information, remembering pointless details from years ago while needing obnoxious electronic assistance to keep up with peoples' birthdays.

Being a good friend: conversation, giving advice, empathy, sympathy, fierce loyalty -- but not afraid of the honest feedback either.

Straddling the middle ground: I'm masculine without being testosterone-poisoned, but I've got enough internal femme to keep things interesting and balanced. On humans, being cynical yet optimistic. On politics, being principled yet pragmatic. Addressing things with serious concern or whimsy, depending on what the situation requires.
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I like to talk and write to excess, I overuse punctuation, you can hear me laughing long before you can see me, and you can hear me sneeze from all the way across the city.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
Books: Anything and everything, but I always make time for Jonathan Lethem, Michael Chabon, Patrick Califia, David Simon, Rick Perlstein, Michael Pollan, Atul Gawande, Jonah Lehrer, Michael Lewis, Tracy Kidder, Charles Stross, and Barbara Ehrenreich. "Whipping Girl" by Julia Serano was the most recent thing that blew my mind.

Movies: I like stuff that explodes, kung-fu, quirky indie charmers, classic noir, thrillers, heist films, foreign imports, smart sci-fi, and quiet non-manipulative emotional pieces. I'll watch anything from Jim Jarmusch (Ghost Dog, Dead Man), John Carpenter (Big Trouble in Little China, The Thing), the Coen Brothers, or Kathryn Bigelow (Hurt Locker, Near Dark). Recent favorites: Moon, The Edge of Heaven, Tell No One.

A TV aside: I can't tear myself away from the tense trainwreck of Breaking Bad. I've mostly stopped ranting about how fantastic and amazing The Wire was (and is), but my doctor tells me the infection can resurface at any time.

Music: I'm a audio slut -- I can find something in every genre to enjoy, though some (e.g. opera, freeform jazz) take more work than others. The most most staggeringly amazing live performance I have seen in ages was Beats Antique. The soundtrack in my head: Aesop Rock. RJD2. Midnight Oil. Welder. Bad Religion. Buckethead. Portishead. Loop!station. PJ Harvey. Sugar. Firewater. Rob Sonic. Blackalicious. Warren Zevon. James McMurtry. Fugazi. Outkast. Bonobo. Concrete Blonde. El-P. Company Flow. Prefuse 73. Deltron 3030. Sleater-Kinney. Ani Difranco. Tricky. Joy Division. Nick Cave.

Food: I like it. I don't eat seafood, and I'm trying to minimize animal protein. I prefer fresh and inventive and well-prepared, with small portions of comfort and decadence, in any available interesting style. (Recent reading -- "Animal, Vegetable, Miracle" -- has made me aware of how out of touch I was with the concept of "in season," so I'm thinking about that a lot these days.)
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
1. Calcium, sodium, and potassium ion channels
2. Structural and fluid integrity of my abdominal cavity, vascular system, and cerebrospinal casing
3. Several ounces of surgically-implanted stainless steel
4. The ATP cycle
5. A selection of artisanal cheeses and rustic breads
6. There is no number six
7. My goddamn sweet bicycle
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
Gender, sexism, justice ~ masculinity and its discontents ~ Oysterband's cover of Bruce Cockburn's "Lovers in a Dangerous Time" ~ the overwhelming experience of roadie-ing on AIDS/LifeCycle 10 ~ will Radiolab ever stop being amazing ~ whether the ropes are too tight ~ Eric Hoffer ~ if I've talked to my friends and family and lovers and everyone else important to me recently enough ~ free will and modern innovations in neuroscience ~ man, how many issues of The New Yorker am I behind on the Kindle? ~ the noises I can coax out of people and the way their eyes roll back in their head ~ why I'm clicking and connecting with trans people here so frequently now ~ where I should try biking to in SF next ~ the scene with the hunters from "Ghost Dog" ~ what I should be doing to train for riding in ALC 11 ~ if you've had enough or can if you can take just a little bit more ~ where I left my watch.
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
If you want a random sampling of things I've found fun since moving out here: City Arts & Lectures ~ getting escorted out of Zeitgeist ~ Kinky Salon ~ Oddball Films ~ Folsom Street Fair ~ flipping off MUNI ~ Ask Dr. Hal ~ events at Femina Potens ~ playing with dogs and kids at Dolores Park ~ Chillits ~ getting sunsick at the Maker Faire ~ traveling to hot springs, especially Sierraville.

I love Workshop SF, am Noisebridge-curious, keep meaning to go to The Crucible, and am very excited for TechShop's opening in SF.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I'd rather talk about my sex life in front of strangers than discuss money in public, and that distresses me.

I often enjoy movie trailers more than the movies themselves, and I love being emotionally manipulated by film score composers.

I sort all of the bills in my wallet by denomination, and make sure they have the same orientation. I rationalize this by saying "At least it's not by serial number or something CRAZY."
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
You're open, sweet, sarcastic, smart, intriguing, charming, and verbal.

You have an awesome piece of California you like (for bicycling, camping, or just walking around and gawking) and you think I'd be an amusing person to show it to.

You are crazy about bicycles. :-D

You have dirty ideas you want to share.

You're more interested in being yourself than being part of any particular subculture.

You have an unconventional sense of humor, and you think you can make me laugh or gasp.

You know there's more to the world than our little part of it, and the choices we've made.

You have respect for others, self-confidence, empathy, compassion, and competence.

You like verbose people who make a lot of lists. (But you wouldn't have made it this far if you didn't.)

You know where I left my watch.

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