I am not searching for puritanical missionary sex. I am also not interested in changing your nappies, forcing you to sit in the closet and watch me have sex with another man, nor helping you shop for women's clothing. Conversely, I am also not interested in licking your boots, crawling around on all fours or being passed around at a party like a football. Trust me, I have many interesting tricks in my repertoire that will keep us both entertained but if you want to pee on me, I'm outta there!
I am a modern, independent woman. I have a job, a car, a house and a life. I am not looking for a sugar daddy, but I am also not interested in footing the bill all the time. I have simple taste. My house is not a mansion, yet is serves to keep me sheltered from the elements, is my safe haven and is affordable. My car is not the latest model, but it gets me from point A to point B and I don't have a car payment. I prefer to travel and spend my money on making memories than spending it on thigs I do not need to impress people I do not like. I am low maintenance; I don't feel the need to go to 5 star restaurants, as a matter of fact, I would prefer that one of us cook. I find that cooking at home is usually more cost efficient and almost always healthier. I love to go out and do things, but you will rarely find me in the fancy clubs or douchbag bars. Sipping a pint at the local micro-brewery is fine with me.
While we are on that subject - please fellas - no active addictions. Everything to excess can be a problem. I don't care if it is alcohol, drugs, gambling, women, video games, or online porn. All of those things are fine in moderation but when you spend more hours playing Call of Duty than working there is a problem. If you xBox controller gets held more than my hand does, this probably will not work out in the long run. We are all a little neurotic and have our insecurities, but I ask that if you have anger issues, are constantly a glass half empty type of person or feel that lying is a competitive sport that you excel at, please, oh please, pass me by! I will always be honest with you and I ask the same in return.
If you are still with me at this point, I am impressed. You deserve a little reprieve from my rant. Let me tell you a story about my childhood. One Christmas, I opened my eyes to see a Christmas tree just bursting with presents. Some were large, some were smaller, all were beautifully wrapped in red paper with shiny green ribbons. My grandmother handed me a small package, no bigger than a match box. It was wrapped in newsprint and tied with kitchen twine. I set it aside and tore into the beautifully wrapped presents waiting under the tree. I got all kinds of toys and games, puzzles and sweets. My childish heart was swelling with all the amazing things that came from those gorgeous packages. Grandma kept an eye on the tiny modestly wrapped box that I had set aside and retrieved it from a pile of discarded wrapping paper before it got thrown out with the rest of the tinsel and shiny bits. After dinner, when we had all played with our gifts and enjoyed the amazing dinner my mom had prepared, my grandmother took me aside and again presented me with the newsprint wrapped box. I hugged her and began removing the twine, eyeing the board game that the other kids were setting up in the living room. Once the twine and newsprint were removed and the matchbox was slid open I saw the most amazingly beautiful garnet ring. It had been my great grandmother's ring, one I had always admired when my grandmother wore it on special occasions, and now my grandmother wanted me to have it. The most beautiful and precious gift was in this bedraggled and plain present. I learned that day that it is very important to not overlook and discount the worth of something because it is not eye catching. Gentlemen, you need not be a GQ model. I will certainly not be gracing the centerfold in Sports Illustrated's Swimsuit Edition. Perhaps we will find just the thing we had always hoped for in packaging that is functional yet not showy.
I am educated. You may be as well, or perhaps your knowledge comes from less formal education. The school of hard knocks can be a cruel and efficient teacher. So can a genuine interest in learning for learning's sake. If you have taught yourself how to do your craft and do it well, a degree is just an expensive piece of paper. Regardless of you education/knowledge, a healthy desire to continue learning throughout your life will put you way far up in my estimation than a man with a multitude of degrees that fails to see this planet as a constant wonder. If you have gotten this far and can see the humor in my words and think "Maybe she could be talking about me" then I enthusiastically encourage you to respond to this posting. I will warn you, however, if you respond with anything along the lines of "hay bb wat u up 2" I will delete your message and go cry in the corner realizing that my faith in men will remain shattered until the next articulate man happens to find his way into my world.
Dream with me, scheme with me, play with me, plan with me. Encourage me, hold my hand, let me hold yours and be your biggest supporter. Travel the world with me. Keep things in perspective. I am looking for that thing I have always admired. That person to be my equal, my best friend and my lover. I am looking for that newsprint wrapped box. Are you my garnet ring?