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45 Bedford, IN Man, Agender, Non-binary

Man, Agender, Non-binary

Similar users

I’m looking for

  • Everyone
  • Ages 18-60
  • Near me
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating, casual sex

My details

Last online
Yesterday – 2:30pm
Pansexual, Queer, Sapiosexual
White, Other
Open relationship
Relationship Type
Strictly non-monogamous
5' 7" (1.70m)
Body Type
Other and it’s important
Doesn’t have kids
Has cats
English (Fluently), Spanish (Somewhat)
My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
First off, I will RARELY if ever send the first note. The kinds of people who are looking for, or accepting of, who and what I am are few and far between, so I prefer to not bug anyone who would rather not hear from someone who is queer and involved in open relationships. This does NOT mean I am not interested in meeting folks of most flavors! I certainly am. I will respond to each and every person, spend a bit of time getting to know you, then decide if we would get along well.

I am eclectic, eccentric, reliable, and fun. I enjoy life and living it and I am never bored. I am patient and passionate about the things I love. I am very intelligent and I love making the people around me feel smart too. I try to be kind and considerate, even to those who do not return the courtesy, but I know how to not be a doormat. I have two female primary partners and a female long distance relationship, with whom I share most things, and we lead a slightly kinked lifestyle without being too out there. We are polyamorous and it's worked pretty well for almost a decade now among my primary partners and I. I've been polyamorous pretty much most of my life and have found that it suits me best. The couple of times I've tried monogamy it ended when they cheated on me! If we start seeing each other my other partners will know.

People who know me casually will assume I am straight because I don't act like a stereotypical queer, whatever that means... I am involved in a lot of traditionally straight male activities, however I am most certainly not straight. I become interested in someone for who they are and their physical attributes are secondary to that. To be sure I appreciate the physical attributes, but it also doesn't matter if those are male, female, both, or neither. I don't try to identify as straight and a lot of the typical gender duality ways of thinking really grate on me as my internal landscape is more androgynous or gender neutral.

I live in the woods and spend most of my time there which suits me fine. If someone offered me an all expenses paid trip to New York City for a week, or an all expenses paid trip to backpack in Alaska for a week, there wouldn't even be any hesitation in the decision. And if I could drive to the Alaska trip so's to experience the country, so much the better. I try to get out west a couple of times a year for backpacking trips, and I love exploring new places away from the crowds. I am off-grid and have been building my homestead for the last two decades now.

I sold a business I ran for a long time a couple of years ago and am enjoying taking some time for myself. I am working part time doing something I enjoy and have the means to support myself. I have never expected someone else to support me and I prefer partners who are self-sufficient.

Oh, that religion thing? I'm respectful of other people's religious beliefs if they are sincere and not hypocritical about them and they don't try to get me to share. As far as myself though, I am an apatheist. Apatheists Just Don't Care.

I am very emotionally stable and even-tempered. I don't buy into the excuse of being "fiery" to describe treating someone else poorly, and I very much treat other people at least as well as I expect to be treated, if not a little better.
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
Mostly exactly what I want to be doing! I teach in emergency services and am involved in a lot of activities.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
I am the proverbial jack of all trades! I love learning new skills and using the ones I have. If I care about you I can listen really well. I enjoy understanding who someone is, but don't mistake that for agreeing with who or what they are.

I build and fix things. I can manage groups of people coming together for a common goal, but I'm a good follower too when I need to be. I tend to be a nexus point in networks of people as I like figuring out who should meet each other.

I am a scientist in that I believe in the scientific method for adding to the general body of knowledge, and I am trained in several disciplines. I am also an intuitive person and often follow my instinct, but I always try to distinguish which is my feeling and which is fact.
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
The impish grin barely hidden.

Many people I've gotten to know over the years have told me that one of the first attractive physical features they noticed about me was my arms. I never gave it much thought until I had several folks tell me about it later.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
Books: Bujold, hands down. Others too numerous to mention. I read a lot! Movies, meh. Shows, some plays and musicals. Music, 60s and 70s rock with a mixture of other eras and genres. Television is a complete waste of time.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
Being out in nature in some way. Urban settings give me the creeps.

I can be unclothed all day long but feel naked without my Leatherman.

Hmmm... pondering.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
Life, the universe, and everything!

At night I lay back, look up at the stars, and wonder...
... what the hell happened to my roof???

Why do so many straight men visit my profile? Secretly interested? Horrified? Repelled? On a related note, why do I get people all over the country visiting my profile all the time?

What percentage of personals ads on sites like these actually result in people meeting and becoming friends or more? In a decade of using them, both as a single person and otherwise, I can honestly say that out of hundreds of conversations with folks, three have resulted in actually meeting someone.

I know it's easy to blow off a name on a screen, but I try to deal with folks I meet online as if they were actual people and treat them as I would like to be treated.

So many people say they are looking, but their actions seem to belie their words. I know not everyone will be compatible, but when it never even gets to the point of getting to know someone, what exactly is the point?
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
I've not had a typical Friday night in years. Half the time it's hanging with a sweetie, the other half the time both my partners and I are traveling somewhere.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I think I have a cute butt. It's the only part of my body I am happy with.
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
You find me interesting and are interesting yourself. I am particularly looking for a casual boyfriend or at least someone who has male equipment even if you don't identify as male. Someone who understands that I already have two primary relationships and a third long distance, all of whom mean everything to me and am not looking for another primary or even a strong secondary and that I am a fairly busy person who WILL make time for people who make time for me. Ideally I would like to meet someone who is involved in many of the activities I enjoy and who wants to share them, and with whom I can be snuggly and enjoy some intimacy as well, but hey, a casual partner is fine too as long as we click.

Someone else wrote this in their profile and it totally resonated with me so I am borrowing it:
"I'm not someone to settle for and if you're not totally into me and think I'm hot, I'm definitely not into you. This article describes my decision-making process about partnerships - and how I want my partners to be with me."

That aside, I am looking for friends in general, male, female, or other, real friends who go out and do stuff together. If they are folks who might be interested in getting intimate with myself and maybe my partners more's the better but it's not a requirement. Deeper emotional development is not off the table but would have to come about naturally, it is not being sought.

If you like doing outdoors stuff and are looking for open minded activity partners, even if nothing physical will ever happen. I really enjoy hiking/backpacking, kayaking, day bike trips...

Maybe you find just me interesting and have no interest in my partners, drop a line and let's see what happens! When I say I'm looking to meet new friends, I'm not just speaking in code, I really am interested in meeting new friends.

If you speak Spanish fluently and want to teach me/us, you've piqued my interest!