It all started when I dropped out of Harvard to continue my work coding a website that, when going public, would crash nasdaq...ok maybe not. Ahem. I was born in Hawaii; did the undergrad at Columbia; law school at Harvard; moved to Chicago; decided to take up a role in politics...no, nope...When I was 2, I was found to be the reincarnation of the 13th Dalai La...man, this is really difficult! How can I TOP the profile you'll be checking out after this one? Here are some tests that I took over the years that might bring to light who I am and where I've been:
'74 Kindergarten: Best Boy Dancer
'86 Seventeen Magazine--compatibility: 15-24--Cameron Frye
'88 Detroit P.D.: .23
'91 Cosmopolitan Magazine-attractiveness: 25-34--solid 4
'98 Maury: you are NOT the father *phew!*
'02 Bike Magazine-personality: 35-44 rocky downhill, endo, front taco
'08 Maxim Magazine-bro-ness: 25-35 better off taking Cosmo tests
'12 OKCupid-worth to read entire profile: *waiting on the results*

Well, make decisions, place judgment, and please try to be gentle.

I've bosom buddied my way to play bass in an all-girl ska band - The 'Ettes'. You'll notice me as the one wearing the short skirt and the looooong jacket. I'm secretly lusting for the trumpet player. Her name is Flo. Don't worry; she's straight. When I'm not following the drummer's snare (or stare), I'm living the fun life. The past 4 years I paid off all of my debt and saved money for a new life in a new location. Reviewing and revamping my plan, I'm now going in a different direction. I just built a HUGE deck. Now I'm going room-by-room tearing down to the studs and finding out how creative I can be with this 1000 sf canvas. How can the idea of designing a kitchen around a cherry-red Big Chill refrigerator be SO interesting? I'm having a GREAT time! And lastly, when the house actually becomes a home again, I have been planning some traveling, just going to go about it in a sort of unconventional way. All I'm going to say is this: 7 songs=7 trips.

Daft punk is playing at my house. At my house. I'm losing my edge.

knowing that I DON'T have ALL of the answers. Listening to the question COMPLETELY before answering. The difference between a single vent and double vent. A two-button, double-vented suit is the best cut. No brown shoes with a black suit on this guy-even if I mostly wear jeans. Looking the part. Making an EXCELLENT toasted cheese sandwich. Yeah, that's right, TOASTED cheese. You're TOASTING the bread right? Not GRILLING it. Not knowing the words to the song yet still holding the beat. I've got soul but I'm not a soldier. Waking up, do a couple laps on the kayak, and then going right back to bed. Including a sentence using an oxford comma.

are the more interesting looking people behind me.

When it comes to reading, anything by Berkeley Breathed, Gary Larson and Bill Watterson. I wonder how awkward it would be to read the Hunger Games trilogy and 50 Shades trilogy together? Hmm... My netflix queue is all over the place. Comedies, dark and sophomoric, indies (it's fun to see if the story line works as hard as the actors are trying to act, or when both just flow ever-so-perfectly), documentaries-I honestly can't get enough, throw in a few dramas, and a once-in-a-while chick flick (just to keep them on their toes-yeah, to keep them on their toes). Recently watched "Bernie", which seemed to tie in most of what I like. I wish I was one of the cool kids and say that I don't watch tv, but, well, if you did stumble upon my profile and made it this far, you know I am in NO way a cool kid. So, on that note, The League ( I don't do fantasy football, but the characters and plot lines are HILARIOUS), Portlandia (what can I say, I can put a bird on it), Happy Endings (I wish I was in that group of friends), and Bitchin' Kitchen (Nadia G, I think I love you. Now schkoff, you nerds!). And lastly, not to be a snob because I really enjoy any type of viewing with subtitles, Honey Boo-Boo (I feel so cultured READING a show). Okay, maybe not. Music. Music. Music. Just like the rest on here. I won't bore you (anymore than I already have) with an overbearing, pretentious list of what I like. Food to me anymore is simple, simple, simple. Cultural prep and ingredients. I know the hype of adventurous eating, but I just can't get into it. Don't get me wrong, I've ran the gamut back in the day, and I do enjoy wild game, but I don't care how or whom prepared it, if it is any kind of a filter, processor, or reproducer, I will NOT try it again.

Seven eight Nine. Actually, Ten eight one two-and it was delicious.

If hipsters will go so far as to ironically bring back parachute pants. Is Chris Rock's full name Christian Rock? If I started a "knock-knock" joke they way I actually knock, would it ruin the punch line? Is there a "midwest" stereotype in China, Russia, or India? Why does the chef/food trailer guy/foodie think that after 30 ingredients, smoked, and suvee'd for 12 hours, simply by putting a fried egg on top suddenly makes the dish AMAZING? Is it me or do said chef/food trailer guy/foodie use WAY too much cilantro, avocado, and cumin? Why is it that brands of cereals had to change their names (Sugar Smacks turned into Honey Smacks, Sugar Pops into Corn Pops, and Super Sugar Crisp--Sugar Bear--is now Golden Crisp), yet Hostess (frowny-face emoticon) still gets to keep Ding-Dongs, Twinkies, and Ho-Ho's? The woman doing the robot in the Roomba commercial. Yeah, what a life I lead! How, after answering the questions here did I become more spontaneous, yet less independent?

Have you ever sat down in the fresh cut grass
and thought about the moment and when it will pass
Hey man, now you're really living.

Imagine all the girls ah-ah ah ah, ah-ah ah ah
And the boys ah-ah ah ah, ah-ah ah ah
And the strings ee-ee ee ee, ee-ee ee ee
And the drums, the drums , the drums,
the drums, the drums, the drums,
the drums, the drums, the drums,
the drums, the drums, the drums, oh

Nothing was the same again, but you gotta love the BPM.

*BUZZZZZZZZZ* 6am. Damn.

I turned down an amazing opportunity to attend Le Cordon Bleu in Paris solely on "she" didn't want me to go. "Hic puer est stultissimus omnium!" (french would've been more appropriate, but ^ ). I'll cry every time I hear "Amazing Grace" played on bagpipes (hauntingly beautiful). Or if you really want to see me cry, just say "The Giving Tree". I google myself only to live vicariously through the other "me"'s accomplishments. I won't eat a corn dog in public (it's a pda thing). I am a gooey, hopeless romantic, but I seem to always find humor. I will ALWAYS remain hopeless, just maybe not so gooey.

Ok, so you actually made it all the way down here. Thanks! I'm confident that the only reason why you made it to this profile is that I viewed yours first (and living a million miles away doesn't make me any more interesting than johnny-one sock standing in front of the mirror flexing his guns). One thing that I will say, I did enjoy reading your profile. Well executed! Lastly, I hope you enjoyed my profile. I just wanted to lighten it up a little with a little dash of who I am. Going through profiles can be a little overwhelming. And reading my profile, maybe, just maybe, I brought a little smile to help keep your bearings on this crazy ebb and flow that we all seem to have to navigate. Best of everything in your search!