Here's what came out of that exercise.
I'm gregarious and highly literate and possibly the most articulate man you will meet anytime soon.
My sense of humor swings a wild arc between the inventively funny and the absurdly juvenile slapstick; in charmed moments when something unrehearsed and gorgeously funny tumbles out, I will try to pretend that I'm not pleased with myself. But, of course, I am.
Determined to never, ever go to paunch, I'm in the gym three times a week, and I run about a thousand miles a year.
I am liberal and public-spirited, and I can explain my views. I believe that conviction is a fine thing, but I have an allergic reaction to most forms of dogmatism.
I read about thirty-to-fifty books a year. I love words. I use words that you know but that you forgot you know because no one else uses them in sentences. Yet I am told that I also deploy the f-word to charming effect also. Dimensions!
My main hobby is writing, which allows me to push the words I love around on a page. Because I lack the discipline to write a book, and because I'd rather socialize than do the hard work of sustained creation anyway, I randomize the shit out of my friends by sending them amusing letters.
I am a self-taught software designer, but I am not a nerd (not that there's anything wrong with that -- I'm just not).
I have excellent fashion sense. I consider Indochino a fashion-porn site. Hell, I look for reasons to wear a suit. If you're interested in hanging out, then you're probably a good reason.
I'm neither obnoxious nor shy. I ask for what I want, but I'm a gentleman too, so I'll always make it easy for you to decline any request that doesn't suit you.
Now, let's talk about sex (remember -- we're doing candor here). I realize certain things profit by mystery, but I want to get a couple things out there just to make things easier on both of us. I am not interested in either S&M or polyamory. I don't believe I'd enjoy a threesome either; I don't enjoy seeing men naked, I believe that one sufficiently vigorous woman is about as much as I aspire to handle, and with that, I believe we've eliminated the viable (for me) configurations.
And now, for the clincher: for all of the foregoing, I am a genial, empathetic, self-deprecating man; this is the last time I will ever talk about myself at such length.