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j_r_hartley

37 M Los Angeles, CA

My Details

Last Online
Online now!
Orientation
Straight
Ethnicity
White
Height
6′ 0″ (1.83m)
Body Type
Fit
Diet
Mostly anything
Smokes
No
Drinks
Socially
Drugs
Never
Religion
Atheism
Sign
Capricorn
Education
Graduated from university
Job
Art / Music / Writing
Income
Relationship Status
Single
Relationship Type
Offspring
Pets
Likes dogs and has cats
Speaks
English

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My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
When I was 21, in Birmingham, England (my homeland), I was hit by a car while riding home from work. As I lay in the street gasping for breath, a kind bystander rested my head on her legs, my face pointing toward the sun. I have light blue eyes and the sun was so bright I physically couldn't keep them open. The woman thought it was because I was dying and started to scream, 'Stay with me! Keep your eyes open!' In order to quiet her down, I punched her in the face with my broken arm. No, I'm kidding. I just lay there hyperventilating, internally laughing at the fact I was trapped in a death cliche. That pretty much sums up how my brain works.
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
Writing, in between bouts of working as a freelance copywriter. So more writing. I'm a serial-learner. I have a whole library of non-fiction as proof. I have an old car I tinker with and autocross. I'm currently learning how to troubleshoot charging/starter circuits for said old car.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
Keeping my shirt on in photos.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
My favorite movie quote ever is from Michel Devries' classic 'How Tall Will The Grass Grow', when Lambert says to Chervalier, 'Shoot yourself. Shoot yourself in the face.'
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
screaming like a girl are...
1. Win a 'scream like a girl' contest.
2. Win Publishers Clearing House.
3. Dive to catch a kitten jumping from a burning building.
4. Wake up to find a bear in my tent [either kind].
5. Reenact Alfred Hitchcock's 'Psycho'
6. Reenact that time a flying cockroach landed on me and I screamed like a girl.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
I need to finish writing this, what's he doing down there, ooo a squirrel, what's that noise, was that an earth tremor, why did that girl say that thing to me in 5th grade, if she was here right now I'd have the perfect response, ooo is that a Porsche, that man walks funny, wait, what was I thinking about...
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
therefore I think.
I’m looking for
  • Girls who like guys
  • Ages 26–36
  • Near me
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
You have never eaten a banana in a sexually suggestive way.