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33 Baton Rouge, LA Man


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I’m looking for

  • Everyone
  • Ages 20–99
  • Located anywhere
  • Who are single
  • For new friends

My details

Last online
Yesterday – 8:05pm
0′ 1″ (0.03m)
Body Type
Mostly other
When drinking
Other, and laughing about it
Gemini, but it doesn’t matter
Dropped out of high school
More than $1,000,000
Has a kid, and might want more
English (Okay)
My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
On April 30th, 1945, Adolf Hitler found himself at the pearly gates, only to find that they weren't  so pearly. It was actually an electric fence with a big sign that read "NO FAGS ALLOWED".  Hitler chuckled to himself. As the gates opened, a magnificent voice came from the megaphone saying  "WELCOME TO BAD ASS MOTHERFUCKER LAND". Hitler was finally home.
Machine guns, hand grenades, army tanks, fighter jets, atomic bombs, and beautiful naked women were everywhere.
"Have a seat" God said. As Hitler did as God commanded him, a nude Marilyn Monroe served him a drink. Lemonade. God began to explain how the three fundamentalisms on planet earth had it all wrong. There was no heaven, no hell, and God couldn't give a rat's ass about good behavior. There was only "Bad ass mother fucker land" and "Pansy Land".
Okay. Before I continue the story, I have to explain a few things. For every minute that passes in BAMFL, one year passes on planet earth. and  this was Hitler's eighth minute. Which would mean that it was March 5, 1953 on planet Earth.
As Beethoven began to play the "Moonlight Sonata" (usually fags weren't allowed, but every once in a while God would make an exception for a true genius) "Hello old friend, it's been a very long time" interrupted Joseph Stalin. "Not long enough" Hitler replied. "Actually, you're just in time" God said.
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
Looking for a new job.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
Nothing that comes to mind.
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
My beautiful green eyes, and my extremely muscular body.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
Ask me.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
I'm doing without a lot of things that I thought t could never do without, and I'm doing just fine.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
How to escape.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I'm not a nazi, I don't like Hitler, Nor Uncle Joe, and I hope no one took that crap I wrote at the top seriously. Oh yea, and if instead of heaven, and hell, there were only "Bad Ass Mother Fucker Land" and "Pansy Land", I'd end up in "Pansy Land".
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
You'd like to write a second chapter to BAMFL.