jamesgold
23 Berkeley, CA
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jamesgold
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My self-summary
Surgeons implanted into each of my feet a piece of metal uncannily similar in appearance to a bullet. I showed the X-rays to my friends and cheekily told them I’d “accidentally shot myself in the foot at a shooting range.” They still don’t know the truth.

From the ages of nine to thirteen I lived fifty feet from the shore of a smelly manmade lake in SoCal. The lake was home to two beautiful black swans, husband and wife. The wife was affectionately named “Lipstick” due to her bright red beak. One fateful day (it was probably a Sunday), the couple was floating carelessly across the lake and failed to notice that they were drifting closer and closer to the edge of an enormous concrete dam. They both fell the entire distance to the water below; the husband lost his life while Lipstick escaped with nothing more than a broken wing. Thereafter, whenever I saw Lipstick float by, wing askew, it felt like I was watching something very important; a relic of a revered past, living out her final days in solitude. The Queen of the Lake.
What I’m doing with my life
I just graduated from Cal and I'm spending a few months in Berkeley just relaxing until I start working.
I’m really good at
- staying calm when people around me are flipping out
- remaining objective
- shaking the building with my sub(woofer, HA)
- setting goals and meeting them
- delaying gratification
- giving massages
- first person shooter video games
- perceiving other people's moods
- being polite and respectful to customer service workers
The first things people usually notice about me
First my height, which is exacerbated by my slenderness. Then, if they get close enough, my long and upward-curling eyelashes. Makes all the girls jealous.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
I listen to music typically for several hours every day. With some pretty nice headphones. Perks of working on a computer. Hip hop, pop, and techno, mostly. jamie xx. Aphex Twin.
The six things I could never do without
- an internet connected computer (although I bet I could)

That's it, really. I try to keep my dependencies low.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
aesthetics, science, math, how to get my code to work, what other people think about me, self-improvement
On a typical Friday night I am
staying in
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
Sometimes I tailor my profile to suit someone I'm interested in.

I've never been to a concert.

I used to work at a tanning salon.
You should message me if
- you have an easygoing personality; that is, not bossy or overly judgmental (super important)
- you're a sucker for good conversation
- you have a critical, scientific mindset. you care about the truth
- you like tall, lanky white guys
- you are sex positive
- this comic resonates with you
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