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30 New Paltz, NY Man


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I’m looking for

  • Women
  • Ages 21-60
  • Near me
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating

My details

Last online
Today – 3:45pm
White, Other
Open relationship
Relationship Type
Strictly non-monogamous
6' 0" (1.83m)
Body Type
Agnosticism but it’s not important
Space camp
Doesn’t have kids and doesn’t want them
English (Fluently), C++ (Somewhat), Czech (Somewhat), Spanish (Somewhat), French (Somewhat)
My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
First thing you should know is that I'm active practitioner of ethical non-monogamy. If you don't know what that is, feel free to ask. I have a partner who used to have a profile, but deleted it because men in this city are the worst.

The second thing you should know is that I'm spending about half my time this month in New Paltz, so I might pop up there or in NYC. Stay tuned to find out where I'm going to be and when.

I have other partners as well, who I see on a more casual basis. Just to be clear, I have a one on one arrangement with all my partners (as opposed to a group arrangement, like a triad). I'm open to the idea of group arrangements in general, but I'm not in any rush to get into one. My partner and I don't believe in a relationship hierarchy or anything. I'm a believer of letting every relationship find its level.

My experience with non-monogamy has taught me that affection, generosity, nurturing and empathy are not finite resources (though sadly time and emotional energy are), so don't feel like I'm going to keep you at arm's length or be inconsiderate of your time and/or feelings.. if I am lucky enough to meet you, that is.

For a lot of people open relationships, and non-monogamy are nothing new, but for a lot of people they are. I'm also aware of the negative stigma around open relationships, thanks in large part to people who attempt them without any tools for dealing with potential bumps (Or they're just fucking bat-shit sociopaths, in which case they should probably keep their dilapidated trailer park of a relationship to themselves. Sorry if that sounds harsh. I've only experienced one such instance of this firsthand. I'll tell you about it some time between generous sips of smooth, smooth bourbon). So if you have any questions or concerns about my open relationship, ask away. It's a subject I'm not the least bit shy about.

It's come to my attention that being a girl on this site can really suck because the second your profile goes live, you're bombarded with copied-&-pasted messages from unsavory gentleman who are sure you've been waiting all your life to be ground up on by them. I've also learned that there's a plurality of guys who can form complete sentences in the Queen's English and appear decent enough in their profile, but when you meet them in real life they have the emotional intelligence of the first category of dudes. I could launch into a lengthy rant about how I'm definitely not one of those guys, but I know the only way to prove that is through good behavior and open communication.

Dream Job: Editor-in-Chief, 'Cat Fancy' Magazine.

What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
Misadventured piteous overthrows.
Been cultivatin' that dad bod since before it was cool.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
Video Editing
Bicycle Riding (I'm a half decent wrench too)
Taking Public Transit in Foreign (and Domestic) Lands
Omelette Engineering
Makin' Out
Finding Stuff (The Secret is to Look Underneath Other Stuff)
Passing Tools to People
Capitalizing Most Words
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
A couple people have told me I'm reminiscent of Paul Rudd, but taller. A "Tall Rudd" if you will. Personally, I'd love for that to be true, but I just don't see it.
If you swiped right because of the GORGEOUS pup in my current profile pic, I begrudge you not (If that pic is no longer my profile pic, and I forgot to amend this section, feel free to send me a gentle reminder).
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
GoodReads profile:

Movies: Enter the Void, Citizen Kane, Anything Chaplin but particularly Modern Times and The Great Dictator, Persona, Pi, Wild At Heart, The Hudsucker Proxy, Underground, There Will Be Blood, Tetsuo The Iron Man, Paprika, Batteries Not Included, Sid and Nancy, Down By Law, Forest Gump II: Bubba's Revenge, Anything Pixar except "Cars," which I just haven't seen (and could be missing out?).

Music: Arcade Fire, Islands, Matt and Kim, Sleighbells, Yeaysayer, The Talking Heads, Japanther, Dragonforce, Ninjasonik, Harry Nilsson... So Much... Too Much... But Somehow Never Enough!
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
Time For Reading.
Dik-Diks (I've never actually seen one in the flesh, but just knowing they exist makes me happy. If you have no idea what a Dik-Dik is, please click this link **I promise it's adorable and not gross**
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
I'm now in my thirties and I find it's not so big a deal because I'm a white, able bodied male and society doesn't treat my sex appeal like a bottle of milk that's starting to get sour. It bums me out that people outside the bubble of privilege have to deal with that. It's also occurred to me that I'm seeing a lot more lovely older women on Quickmatch now because they set their minimum age to 30. Good move ladies! I'd probably set the same parameters if I dated guys (though as we all know, for most men, adolescence ends around the same time as the ability to chew solid food, amaright?!). What I guess I'm trying to say is that I'm happy to be here, and look forward to proving that sex and dating will only get better with age if we can all get past our culture's ridiculous Dorian Gray body standards!

Looking through my answers to questions on OkCupid, and thinking: "Oh shit, why would I ever say that?! I sound like a misogynist asshole! What, I can only re-answer two questions in a 48 hour period (unless it's a leap year or mercury is in retrograde)?! FUUUUUUU.....!"

'Noiseman Sound Insect' (
Neoliberalism and how it's smugly ruining everything
The Uncanny Valley
Squirrels: Nature's Ninjas
The Space Elevator
Tard: The Grumpy Cat (
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
Tearing up to episodes of 'My Cat From Hell' on Netflix.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I've never driven a car or taken a driving lesson in my life. But I will soon, I promise.
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
You want to exchange witty banter.
You want to exchange witty pheromones.
You would pay a street musician to stop playing Sublime (We can probably still date if you like Sublime, but not to the level that I have to ever hear it or acknowledge that it was once a thing. Sorry, I have my reasons for this and I'll gladly discuss in person).
You don't mind seasonal facial hair.

I'm also interested in networking with other film/video professionals, shooters and editors in particular. So feel free to reach out for that purpose, and I will keep it oh, so platonic and professional. I know there's other sites for that, but Linkedin gives me a rash.

Oh, and here's a deal for those of you who may want to message me, but are suddenly overcome by writer's block (this happens to me quite a bit, and I can't be the only one): Feel free to write a very brief (even single word) message ending in "Mayonnaise." This is partly to test if you've closely read my profile, and partly to give you an out for aforementioned writer's block. Bonus points if you can catch the literary reference. Nobody has so far, even a few who are familiar with the author, so here's a hint (NO GOOGLE SEARCHING!): He's a late beat / proto-hippie poet who migrated from Tacoma to San Francisco to Montana, and once wrote a story about watermelons that grow black and soundless on a certain day of the week. That particular story doesn't contain the "mayo" reference, but if you're familiar with the author, you'll know that it's included in a three volume omnibus along with the story that does, and you'll know it's the right omnibus if you look at the back cover (There's three omnibii of the author's work by the same publisher. Also, that's the correct plural form of omnibus, no matter what spell-check says!)

And in case you zipped right to the bottom of my admittedly lengthy profile, please keep in mind that I'm in a committed-open relationship, and it's a pretty serious-major part of my life. If that's not a deal breaker, then bless you, and let's get to know each other!

I will be more likely to message you first if we have a high match rating, AND it say's you're open to open-relationships. In fact I won't message anyone who says they're not open to non-monogamy, out of respect. However, I know from experience that some of you out there are interested in open relationships, but have a good reason for not advertising it publicly (not that you should feel the need to defend that reason to me or anyone). If you fall into that category and think you might want to date me, please feel free to message me for some winning conversation that WON'T involve shaming you for not being out about your non-monogamy.