I am an expert in Lego,
a veteran in love
an outlaw in Lesotho.
Deep within the unending litany of questions
asked by this site, this is asked;
"Is it a requirement that you communicate every day with your significant other (via phone, text, in person, whatever)"?
These were the four responses offered;
1) Yes, no matter what
2) Yes, unless otherwise specified
3) No, it's not necessary
4) No, I'd prefer not to communicate daily
I nod toward, #3 and on rare occasions,
#4(absence makes the heart...)
I really believe what this question asks, is;
"Just how insecure are you?"
I'm not married.
I've Never cheated on anyone. Ever.
I believe in implicit trust.
If you feel that #1 & #2 are of paramount importance, then we'll most likely fall into the, "y'all got issues" category.
Also if you shop at Walmart,
thought that Bridesmaids wasn't a huge piece of S@#t (I've never met you, and I'm not sure you exist)
Or identify with Organized religion(s)...again, issues.
So, instead of perusing my prolix profile, perhaps you should prudently push on to your next mystery date.
On the other hand, if none of that applies to you...then read on. It's somewhat circumlocutory, but I believe it briefly visits every possible facet, of my one dimensional self.
At this point in life,
I've become aware that my past travels and accomplishments shouldn't define me and really aren't as important as to who I am now.
It's either that, or, who I am now, really, isn't as important as my life defining past travels and accomplishments.
As unoriginal, simplistic and trite it may be,
I really strive to laugh or more specifically to make everyone, laugh.
Really. It's my avocation.
It's somewhat of a defining aspect of my life.
Actually, it's the only, defining aspect of my life(That I'll share here)
Try as I may, I can't imagine how to convey any true personal depth (assuming that I possess discernible depth) in an on-line self-summary (other than that)
You might and or, should, notice random changes in my, "about page-profile"
Because I feel you should have some, added incentive to revisit it.
This page should be constantly evolving(albeit glacially)
Drawing you back in...making you yearn for more, hoping for better prose, yet strangely satisfying you with verbose pointlessness and vexing you with appalling grammar.
(From this point on, this becomes, more or less, a blog)
I'm amazed with how many of us (children of the sixties)
I wonder if OKcupid(or any, online "dating" site) was available to us in the early eighties,
if we'd be looking for new people thirty years later?
Or is it that regardless of how perfect our match was in our twenties, thirty years later, we'd still be where we are now?
Whatever the answer is, tell me we don't live in a fantastic time,
in which we can online shop, for anything.
Including each other
(I believe that's what we're doing, isn't it?)
Perhaps the only downside being that we're experiencing the paradox of choice?
As in, the culture of abundance, robbing us of satisfaction as well as setting us up for unrealistically high expectations...
Then again, Perhaps not.
But in the excitement, I forgot to write it down, so I'm working on that...again.
NOTIFICATION(and quasi buzz kill): Any institutions or individuals(including Batman, Superman & Don Draper) using this site or any of its associated sites for studies, projects, advertising, sales, insomnia cures or any other reason-you DO NOT have permission to use any of my profile or pictures in any form or forum
(whether you're for'em or against 'em)
both current and future.
If you have, or did or you're diligently doing the deed, Don't.
Because, I'll consider it a violation of my privacy and will be subject to legal ramifications.
That's right, Ramifications!
(which, would've made an excellent title to a series of 70's gay porn...)
I recommended that other members post a similar notice, posthaste.
Perhaps, things in which we happen to excel?
And if that's the case,
Then I'm really good at Microsoft's Excel.
The complete collections of Theodor Geisel and George Remi
as well as, The lightheartedness Of, Friedrich Nietzsche and
the comedy team of Kierkegaard & Kafka.
The one unifying aspect for me, that makes a film
(or anything or anyone) interesting is;
Tell me a story I haven't heard.
The smattering of films listed below, accomplishes that.
(In No particularity order)
The Black Stallion; absolutely stunning cinematography
(Caleb Deschanel) Direction (Carroll Ballard) and music
(Carmine Coppola) Quite possibly one of the most beautiful films ever made. If you've never seen it, stop reading this list and netflix it to your bachelorette abode immediately, then watch it on the largest screen available to you.
Once you've done that, you can then finish reading this eclectic list, which includes;
Harold and Maude,
The Zero Effect,
Used Cars (The Most underrated Comedy ever)
Big trouble in little China,
Mystery Men (Again, underrated Neo-Classic with a superb cast that propels "Mystery Men" to the status of #1 cult movie of all time)
Hombre(Was Paul Newman, ever cooler in a film? Yeah, he was even cooler than he was in, Cool hand Luke...)
Super Troopers (I know...chalk this one up as a guilty pleasure)(Meow)
Run Lola Run,
Fandango(Featuring the 2 Kevins)
V is for Vendetta,
Koyaanisqatsi (live in Southern California for a while and this film is all the more poignant),
LA Confidential-American Beauty(when Spacey was at his hippest)
Bill Forsyth Films (Gregory's Girl/Local Hero; with Local Hero being in my top five films of all time and if you're any kind of film aficionado, it should be on your short list as well.)
The majority of the films of the Coen Brothers,
Charlie Kaufman (Adaptation/Being John Malkovich/Eternal sunshine of the spotless mind)
The film's of: Billy Wilder, John Ford, Sidney Lumet, Alan Parker and David Mamet.
Two of The most enjoyable films in years;
Scott Pilgrim vs. the world(The best film of 2010 hands down and really one of the most original films in the last five years. Really.)
The Lego Movie (I'm like you, you're like me, we're all working in harmony)
Breaking Bad, Dexter, The Wire, Mad Men, The Walking Dead, Nova, Frontline, 60 Minutes, Blackadder,
The Avengers(1961-1969) The new Avengers (1976-1977) Fawlty Towers, The Prisoner, PBS Mystery, PBS Masterpiece, Simpsons, Family Guy, The Soup, Kids in the hall, Real Time, The Daily Show(not really the same with Jon gone though)
The Colbert Report(recently departed, but now kinda re-imagined as The late show) Last week Tonight, Top Gear, Archer and thanks to hulu, Reaper.
Within reason, I'm a regular NPR/PRI listener.
Yet, I don't drive a, Volvo wagon, a Subaru or a hybrid.
To a certain degree, I'm a believer in; you are what you drive. Again, to a certain degree...
My likes are all over the map (my dislikes as well)
Although I gravitate toward upbeat output of any era and genre.
I might update this list as I remember various artists.
I groove on the Girl vocalist sound, such as;
Veruca Salt(Now reunited after 18 years and touring as you read this!)
The Breeders, Shocking blue, Flying Lizards, BananaRama, Motels, Missing persons, Berlin, Concrete Blond, Go-Go's, Bonnie Hayes,
Voice of the beehive, Betty Boo, Bangles, Suzanne Vega,
The Pretenders, Romeo Void, Aqua and of course, I do deeply dig Deee-lite (And just in case you forgot The depth of their hula groove; https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gzoEK545j64)
I also groove on the non-girl sounds of:
RUN-DMC, Grandmaster Flash and the furious five, DEVO, Brit New wavers; The English Beat & Madness, The Ska sound of the Untouchables, The 60s sound of The Beatles/The Who/The Stones, as well as Dick Dale(King of the surf guitar) And
The Dixie Dregs and the underrated genius of The Tubes.
I'm somewhat amazed that current bands can still offer fresh sounds, e.g., OK Go, TheMooneySuzuki, Lemon Demon.
I was(and embarrassingly, kinda, still am...) a Huge audio sponge of eighties music.
I was 18 in 1980 and 28 in 1990 (My College/University Decade) and it was all spent in Southern California, Where I worked as the event coordinator/concert promoter for Universal and Pacific amphitheaters, So, I blame my banal musical taste on that cultural environment...
Although, On the progressive side,
I was raised in Northern California (Berkeley/San Francisco) & later, Oregon, with Classical and Opera (Mom played classical piano & Dad sang Opera) and whatever genre Gilbert & Sullivan represent.
So I enjoy all of the classic composers except Wagner(Bist du verruckt?)
Italian (it's genetic) Belgian-French (if you've dined in Brussels, then you know of what I speak)
German, Greek, Spanish, Hungarian, Lebanese, Vietnamese, Thai, Korean, Ethiopian, Chinese, Indian, Cajun, Mexican,
but not Cuban. I keep trying it and I keep not liking it.
I stopped eating beef just this side of fifteen years ago as well as about, ninety five percent of all Dairy products.
Me thinks, it was The thirty five years of published credible journalistic dietary science, that finally swayed me...
I am one of those food elitist morons, that shop at Local farmers markets and semi-specialized grocers and for some reason, the majority of my food shopping is at, Trader Joe's
(although, socially conscience friends have pointed out that Trader Joe's, really isn't as progressive as it appears and in fact, in some aspects, no better than Walmart. Eh? What!? Really?!?)
and of course, I'm down wit da, Whole foods
(To facilitate your comprehension on this food shopping anomaly, clicky this linky)
A Wonder Woman Pez Dispenser.
My Black Belt In Full Contact Origami.
My International Dirigible Pilot's license.
And of course, A Twelve room Habitrail.
I believe to a certain extent, that we don’t know what we’ve got until we lose it, but I also believe that we don’t know what we’ve been missing until it arrives
(you know, like teeth)
then gripping the table and screaming in terror at the top of our lungs while intensely staring at a spider on the wall.
maybe arranging flowers.
My deft floral arrangements have earned me fame in international botany circles.
It Really depends on my mood...
Smart wordsmiths, fascinate me and Yet, Simultaneously annoy
me with their grammatical smugness...
Here's a bit 'O bitterness, I'm unable to suppress;
I keep reading this type of warning from the vast majority of the women here and this is (within a few words or two) how the warning goes- " I AM NOT INTERESTED IN YOU GUYS THAT ARE IN YOUR 20's AND 30's. So if you choose to send a message, it'll just be deleted and you'll be blocked!"
Really, you have guys half your age writing to you and telling you that they find you attractive?
And you're upset about this!?
This is one time that I can knowingly speak for Every male over forty on okcupid (or anywhere) "You can't be F*#@ing serious?"
Do you know how many times this happens to any of us?
Mmmm, never. Ever.
Nor will it, ever.
So, re-appraise that righteous indignation and look upon it with a little more appreciation the next time it occurs
(which from what I can glean, is about every half hour)
I'm not saying act on it, just appreciate the perspective.
Lest I forget this little visual gem; When you include a picture of yourself, it's best, Not, to see you and/or, your cirrhosis sisters hoisting your cocktails glasses to the waiter/cameraperson in an effort to show how you can really, let go and "party"
Perhaps it's time to put an end to group photos of women with drinks in their hands.
Selfies of aforementioned, "women", behind the wheel of a car.
What the hell?
What exactly is the message you want to convey?
"Look, I can drive a car AND take a selfie"
Holy Christ! You're more than a guy could ever dream about! Let's get married!
Let's start a new campaign to join, "It can wait"
and we'll call it, "It should never happen".
While I'm on the subject, Selfies in general; The worst of the worst of the worst.
Although, in the spirit of equality,
It's also time to end the pictures of men, amidst-mid-life crisis, standing(perhaps shirtless) next to, or in/on, their cars or motorcycles,
which is equally, as Pathetic.
Especially if it's a Monster truck.
Or worse, a Corvette.
Or worse yet, the ubiquitous Harley.
It's been pointed out that men on this site, are including pictures of themselves with dead animals(?!)
I offer this explanation; I believe that most men post a picture, that would impress, most, other men (with a high probability that the picture will
include a Car, a Boat, or even a Rocket ship
and/or something they've recently killed...)
With nary a clue, as to what include,
that would make any impression on females whatsoever.
Men are emotionally fragile, they need constant reinforcement of their accomplishments (real or imagined) by flagrantly exhibiting
them. Men face more intra-sexual competition than women, and so they advertise their sexual fitness through daring exploits more overtly. This explains why men tend to take even more risks when they're in groups. Though women are generally more risk-averse, everyone strives to impress on occasion.
What can I say?
We're all little boys in big boy bodies.