By profession, I am a civil servant (analyst), by education and avocation I am a writer, thinker and communicator.
I look for the opportunity to win the respect and affection of one really decent, honest, warm, funny, kind, intelligent and well centered guy. I want to spend the rest of my life enjoying rather than complaining or listening to it, compromising rather than arguing, appreciating rather than expect (and get the same in return), and live a life in which we hold hands not grudges....
Born in Maine, I'm a Michigan transplant. I grew up all around the US in a large military family. Then, my career took me all over the world (Guam, Iceland, Europe), until I settled here. My personal favorite place to live and work was the UK, where I stayed for 17 years during 3 separate tours of duty. Following those years, did a year in the DC area and came back to Michigan in 1999 where I will remain until I retire.
By no means do I see "any" relationship as my goal. It is not a man (or woman) on one's arm that has meaning, it's finding the special person with whom you can share all things. Some one you can always turn to and know they have your back and you have theirs. The romance comes from the closeness and trust two people can develop. It is important that you can appreciate a smart, accomplished and responsible women because I am. Not much in need of rescuing.
I have a philosophy about maturity in relationships. I believe we must be open to the joys and realities of real relationships, not Hollywood's version of them. It is a critical distinction, in that one leads to real friendship and love and the other leads to unreal expectations and disappointment. As much as it would be nice to believe in magic, I know real love doesn’t happen overnight, nor is it driven by hormones and fairy tales.
The man I seek says what he means, and DOES what he says, (Integrity is CRITICAL). Lest you think me demanding, I never ask more than I am able to give, including (and especially) sincerity and operating with the highest degree of integrity.
Possessed of a wide range of interests, I am always open to more. Ideally, ours would be a rare relationship in which you bring joy, peace, and humor from your happy life, and I most definitely can return the favor. We have awesome shared time and independent time in which we dream for the next together time.
I don't do drama I just cannot "do" negativity, manipulation and upset. I have lost friends and family who would have been overjoyed to have one more day on earth and would have used that time making sure those they loved knew it. So, I know life can be so short, and what we have of time on earth should be lived well and enjoyed!
I believe that people who are deeply committed can disagree and find middle ground anyway -- when they choose to do so. Those who respect others and value a relationship understand that mutual respect requires more depth than one person's need to bully, to "be right," or to "win." Frankly, peace, harmony and mutual respect are essential for a great relationship, a nice life and to me.
In spite of what you have read so far, my idea of the perfect man is far from "perfect." He's made mistakes, but optimism keeps him moving forward. He does what needs to be done and does so with honor, dignity and humor. He knows himself, he knows what he has to offer and that he wants someone who offers the same to him. I care about the complete person you are, the humanity, not the hairline. In an interview with actress Joanne Woodward, during which her husband Paul Newman's "handsomeness" became a topic of discussion, Joanne said, "Sexiness wears thin after a while and beauty fades, but to be married to a man who makes you laugh every day, ah -- now that's a real treat."
Are you reasonably confident and proud of what you have achieved in life? A healthy sense of self esteem is essential. If YOU believe in YOU, I can easily do so too. I hope you value education and prosperity as goals, but esteem honor and character much more.
I love kids and have a grown daughter and no grand children. For me it is easy to fall in love with kids...and I don't think any child can have too many people who love and guide them.
The man I seek is kind and tolerant -- treating others with dignity and respect. You love your children (and grandchildren if you have them), your work (if still working), animals, the earth and your home. You find great joy in the relationships in your life and love the family ties you have. Those whom you love and respect, can't help but love you right back because of your kindness, humor and downright "down home" decency.