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joel_23

33 M Southampton, UK

I’m looking for

  • Women who like men
  • Ages 21–34
  • Near me
  • For new friends, long-term dating

My Details

Last Online
Aug 26
Orientation
Straight
Ethnicity
White
Height
6′ 2″ (1.88m)
Body Type
Overweight
Diet
Smokes
Yes
Drinks
Not at all
Drugs
Sometimes
Religion
Buddhism, and somewhat serious about it
Sign
Aries, and it’s fun to think about
Education
Graduated from law school
Job
Law
Income
$30,000–$40,000
Relationship Status
Single
Relationship Type
Offspring
Pets
Dislikes dogs and has cats
Speaks
English (Fluently), French (Okay), Italian (Poorly), Latin (Poorly)

Similar Users

My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
Well, where does one go with these things?

I don't really like talking about myself. I don't find it very interesting - I prefer finding out about other people. Maybe this is an unhelpfully frank explanation, but I already know about myself in the main, so getting to know about other people is more rewarding.

Because I accept I'm an 'unreliable narrator', how about I try you with the fact that several people have suggested I am "like a young Stephen Fry". There are some differences I'd want to highlight - not being gay, not having bi-polar disorder, never having worked with Hugh Laurie - but I'm not sure you go too wildly wrong if you have that in mind. I'm not as posh, but equally it's fair to say that I'm nowhere near as charming either!

Since I'm a bit short on photos including me, to make a rough stab at my appearance I'm also told I look a bit like Dom Jolly. I'm willing to accept that as long we're not recalling that show he made dressed as Tintin.

To round this up as a trilogy, I was chatting to a supermarket security guard the other day. Although English wasn't his first language, we relatively quickly established he was trying to say I look "like a fat Russell Crowe". Which was nice.

Er, I'm also not as obsessed with comparing myself to celebrities as the last 3 paragraphs would suggest. Maybe you see why I don't like talking about myself now ...

Finally, apparently I enjoy doing psychometric tests: being told what I am like. If you dig Myers-Briggs, I understand I'm a fairly typical "INFJ". What more can I say?
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
I'm deputy manager at a local legal advice charity specialising in employment problems and welfare benefits. It's rewarding work, and there's nothing like a recession to keep an organisation like us busy. I appreciate I'm lucky to be doing a job I love, and working amongst people I get on well with.

Outside of work I play guitar and (on occasion) sing in a band, as well as writing and playing solo. In the band we're playing with quite a lot of influences, from rock to surf-punk and blues. I'd like to think my own singing and songwriting influences are Son House, Leonard Cohen, and Tom Waits.

I'm fairly sure I read more than average, and I'm going through what may amount to a 'phase' of not owning or watching TV at the minute. In reality that's partly about cashflow having just stepped into a mortgage, but I'd like to think it's also a kind of (mild) exercise in self-control and self-improvement!
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
Meh, I don't really like saying that I'm "really good" at anything. To me the phrase sounds ugly and arrogant. Weirdly or otherwise, it doesn't sound like that when *other* people say it.

I mean, I'm (generally) "really good" at spelling, say, but is that something to boast about? Is that a quality of moral or spiritual depth? Of course not. There's a bunch of things I'm "good" at I guess, it's just that "really" sounds a bit awkward.

I'm fairly sure I'm good at my job, but I expect that's of more interest if you've been unfairly dismissed or overpaid Working Tax Credit than if we were friends or went out.

As explained, I wouldn't say I was "really" good at writing or music, but I've won a few writing competitions (in the past), and I appeared on a (comercially, but locally, produced indie) CD.

I like to think I'm a good listener, too, although it isn't a very difficult skill perhaps. I also think I'm pretty good at cooking, and certainly haven't killed anyone yet.
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
My inability to use short sentences; my tendency to make self-effacing asides.

I guess people notice that I'm kinda tall too, although that isn't necessarily something to be proud of - I didn't do much to earn it.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
Books - top 3 would be "Portrait of the artist as a young man" by James Joyce, "In the name of the rose" by Umberto Eco, and "Tristram Shandy" by Lawrence Sterne. Outside of fiction I'd want to say that my favourite book is "Pity the Nation" by Robert Fisk.

Films - my top 3 favourite films are "Aliens", "Carry on Cleopatra", and "Love, actually". I accept that I have rubbish taste in films. The next 3 would probably be "The Big Lebowski", "Dr Strangelove", and "Airplane" - which kinda proves my point I guess.

Music - I'm fairly sure everyone 'likes all kinds of music'; not to play into that cliche too deeply, but I have quite a catholic taste. Let's keep the three-is-the-magic-number vibe and say that, currently, my 3 favourite pieces of music would be Beethoven's "Emperor" concerto, Sam Cooke's "A change is gonna come", and "Dark was the Night" by Blind Willie Johnson. I'm sure that sounds a bit pretentious, but perhaps that's a fair comment!

Food - smoking furiously as i do, my taste buds are perhaps a little jaded. I really like Italian and Chinese (or Thai) food, although basically I'll eat anything.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
In no particular order: cigarettes; music; friends; language (reading, writing, talking, analysing, blah, blah, blah); having time by myself. Did i say cigarettes? Okay, chocolate.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
... what is the right thing to do in a given situation? That is, basically, what life is all about. I appreciate that sounds kinda lame, but I'm certainly not suggesting I'm very good at then always doing the right thing.

I also have the good fortune to think in musical figures some of the time; that's a very enjoyable way of passing your day.
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
At band practice, but that's an unrepresentative example since most nights you'll find me at home with a good book (perhaps having a wee smoke).
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
Last time I updated this I couldn't think of anything to say. I think I'm still going to play that card.

Don't get me wrong, I'm not exactly an international man of mystery: I'm just genuinely not quite sure what anyone would want me to say here.
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
Any or all of the above hasn't put you off!

Depending on where your interest lies you'll probably want to be prepared to prioritise personality over looks, not mind smoking, and be prepared to tolerate the fact that I talk and write in quite a similar way.