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31 Bloomington, IN Man


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I’m looking for

  • Women
  • Ages 23-32
  • Near me
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating, casual sex

My details

Last online
Nov 23
5' 9" (1.75m)
Body Type
A little extra
Not at all
Atheism but it’s not important
Working on University
Doesn’t have kids but wants them
Has dogs
English (Fluently), Spanish (Somewhat), Latin (Somewhat)
My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
My old summary of my old summary was too long, as it turns out, to be considered a summary.
Those responsible for the old summary have been sacked.
Basically, I'm pretty awesome. I use my superior wit and sense of humor to cover for all other deficiencies I may have and my spirit animal is an American Gladiator named Nitro. I've got an awesome dog, an awesome sense of humor, an awesome grasp of a broad variety of interests, a group of awesome friends that I'm looking to expand via this site, and I keep myself in good shape considering how in love with cooking and good food I am (a lot).
I am the classic ENTP apparently because I've never scored as anything else. I love being around people and making them laugh.
I talk a lot when given the chance and say stupid things, but sometimes I don't.
Also, I don't drink but I'm cool with the bar scene and whatnot. About 5 years ago I decided it wasn't for me. It's a thing.
I'm a fan of the Atlanta Braves, Ohio State Buckeyes, and the Colts.
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
Just moved down to Bloomington for a new job in IT at the beginning of June. It's a great opportunity and I'm super excited, and I've also taken this opportunity to shake up a lot of my life. Living simpler, eating better, working out (almost) every day, etc etc etc. Bloomington is freaking great by the way. Also I work in a bookstore part time, which is also pretty fun. Going back to school once finances settle out and I hit a groove, hopefully Spring

I'm an EMT and Pharmacy Tech according to the state licensing board but am not practicing because those jobs pay piss unfortunately, and I'm joining my third concurrent DnD group soon because I'm also a crazy person.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
I've developed a quick wit and wry sense of humor as a response to growing up extra awkward and plump. They've served me in good stead all of these years, and are quite nice to have around now that I'm borderline obsessed with fitness and keeping myself in fat powerlifter shape.
In a similar vein, I like lifting heavy things. After I'm done lifting them, I generally put them down. Oftentimes I will repeat this many times in a row. I like to eat big and lift big and gain great satisfaction therein.
I'm very good at cooking a limited number of dishes. One might call these dishes very "bachelor" in nature, but that'd be a great oversimplification. "Caveman" would be far more apt as my canvas for culinary arts general involves open flames and large pieces of meat and I have no truck with fiddly things like sauces and fine dining where the portions are tiny but the plates are silver.
I read a lot and know a lot of fun (albeit useless) stuff.
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
Sense of humor, possibly, or at least that's what I try to put forward. Physically it would probably be the beard and my moustache that I enjoy twirling when formulating plans of daring do.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
Books: Everything by Kurt Vonnegut, but especially Cat's Cradle. All time favorites include: Hitchhiker's Trilogy, Lathe of Heaven, more or less the entirety of Terry Pratchett's works, Hey Nostradamus, Into Thin Air, A Scanner Darkly, David Sedaris, etc

Movies: #1a is The Manchurian Candidate (the original) because it freaking owns and #1b is Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind because sometimes I'm a big man baby. Also I enjoy the non-director's cut version of Donnie Darko, pretty much any documentary, Hedwig and the Angry Inch and very few other musicals, any Monty Python, those sorts of things.

TV: Parks and Rec, Justified, Archer, Venture Brothers, American Dad

Music: Neko freaking Case. Lana del Ray kick lately, Lindsey Stirling, The Pogues, The Chieftans, bluegrass in general, unexpected combinations like The Gray Album by DJ Danger Mouse, Dire Staits, Buckethead, horrible club pop music and heavy metal for the gym, Bright Eyes/Connor Oberst in general, singer-songwriter stuff, Josh Ritter especially.

Food: I will literally eat anything put in front of me except big mushrooms. Smaller mushrooms I've learned to tolerate, and I don't even dislike the flavor, it's the texture that kills me.

There's a special place in my heart for sushi, kimchi, big hunks of meat, turkey legs wrapped in bacon, tempeh, homemade hummus, homemade yeast breads (in moderation, carbs kills after all), Thai and Mexican, and pretty much anything spicy. In fact, the spicier the better. Still haven't run across a restaurant here in Bloomington that will make something murderously spicy but I am holding out hope.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
My dog.
Lifting weights. Or as I like to call it, 'intensive ferric psychotherapy.'
My brain extensions (smartphone/laptop)
Tea (Jade Oolong especially)
Just going to go ahead and list tiramisu again because it's just great.

This list is subject to change upon the event of future vexation.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
Why do people love carbs so much despite them being so clearly inferior to fats and proteins?

Why does my stupid brain only get stuck on the world's worst songs (I'm looking at you, Shake It Out).
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
Well as the new guy I get the late shifts so I'm generally at work playing Minecraft and browsing OKCupid.

Given free time, I'll generally go out and try a new restaurant with whatever buddy is free. Friday night was my DnD night for years but now it isn't so I'm just kind of flapping loose to be quite honest
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
One of the driving passions in my life is to find the most depressing song ever written and performed. Not in an emo kind of way or anything, it just fascinates me.
Bonus points go to any song that sounds peppy but is actually about soul-crushingly depressing things.
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
You're looking for friends or something more down the road, you're upbeat or even just not senselessly negative all the time, you're a local who can show me the ropes of this new town, if you're a non-local who can pretend to be able to convincingly

If you enjoy beards and good conversation

If you like talking about weight lifting and the evils of cardio

If you're a baseball or football fan

If you think tacos are appropriate any time of day, or if you just want to chat

I'm a pretty amicable dude and would love to hear/hear back from you

Also I'm new in town and would appreciate learning Bloomington as well as I knew Indy