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30 Indianapolis, IN Man


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I’m looking for

  • Women
  • Ages 21–32
  • Near me
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating, casual sex

My details

Last online
May 18
5′ 9″ (1.75m)
Body type
Strictly anything
Not at all
Atheism, and somewhat serious about it
Scorpio, and it’s fun to think about
Working on university
Doesn’t have kids, but wants them
Has dogs and likes cats
English (Fluently), Spanish (Poorly), Latin (Poorly)
My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
My old summary of my old summary was too long, as it turns out, to be considered a summary.
Those responsible for the old summary have been sacked.
Basically, I'm pretty awesome. I use my superior wit and sense of humor to cover for all other deficiencies I may have and my spirit animal is an American Gladiator named Nitro. I've got an awesome dog, an awesome sense of humor, an awesome grasp of a broad variety of interests, a group of awesome friends that I'm looking to expand via this site, and I keep myself in good shape considering how in love with cooking and good food I am (a lot) and how much I hate cardio (a lotter), and I genuinely enjoy the company of others.
I'm a world record holder in jumping to the wrong conclusion from a standing start. I am the classic ENTP apparently because I've never scored as anything else. I love being around people and making them laugh.
I talk a lot when given the chance and say stupid things, but sometimes I don't.
Also, I pissed away a lot of good years drinking, so I gave it up. I love to go to bars and stuff and I'm totally comfortable around alcohol and being the DD, but I've been sober for awhile. Just celebrated my 3 year anniversary, in fact. If that's a deal breaker for whatever reason, there ya go. It's not something that offends me.
I'm a fan of the Atlanta Braves, Ohio State Buckeyes, and the Colts.
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
Pharmacy tech, EMT, student. Playing too many video games (both in quantity and time invested) is a vice. Also tabletop games. Also thinking about dragons.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
I've developed a quick wit and wry sense of humor as a response to growing up extra awkward and plump. They've served me in good stead all of these years, and are quite nice to have around now that I'm borderline obsessed with fitness and keeping myself in fat powerlifter shape.
In a similar vein, I like lifting heavy things. After I'm done lifting them, I generally put them down. Oftentimes I will repeat this many times in a row. I like to eat big and lift big and gain great satisfaction therein.
I'm very good at cooking a limited number of dishes. One might call these dishes very "bachelor" in nature, but that'd be a great oversimplification. "Caveman" would be far more apt as my canvas for culinary arts general involves open flames and large pieces of meat and I have no truck with fiddly things like sauces and fine dining where the portions are tiny but the plates are silver.
I read a lot and know a lot of fun (albeit useless) stuff.
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I was told the other day that I look like Alejandro Sanz, so that's worth mentioning. Full disclosure though, I'm more often compared to Jack Black or a shorter Seth Rogan, as well as to most of the cast of Duck Dynasty.

Or maybe my rippling abs.
If you poke them hard enough, they ripple!

Oh and of course the beard when I've got it. It comes and goes.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
Books: Everything by Kurt Vonnegut, but especially Cat's Cradle. All time favorites include: Hitchhiker's Trilogy, Lathe of Heaven, more or less the entirety of Terry Pratchett's works, Hey Nostradamus, Into Thin Air, A Scanner Darkly, David Sedaris, etc

Movies: #1a is The Manchurian Candidate (the original), #1b is Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind. Also I enjoy the non-director's cut version of Donnie Darko, pretty much any documentary, Hedwig and the Angry Inch, any Monty Python, those sorts of things.

TV: Parks and Rec, Justified, Archer, Venture Brothers, American Dad

Music: Lana del Ray kick lately, Lindsey Stirling, The Pogues, The Chieftans, bluegrass in general, unexpected combinations like The Gray Album, Dire Staits, Buckethead, horrible club pop music and heavy metal for the gym, Bright Eyes/Connor Oberst in general, singer-songwriter stuff, Josh Ritter especially.

Food: Everything but the crime that is giant mushroom caps in a hamburger bun. There's a special place in my heart for sushi, kimchi, big hunks of meat, turkey legs wrapped in bacon, tempeh, homemade hummus, homemade yeast breads (in moderation, carbs kills after all), Thai and Mexican, and pretty much anything spicy. In fact, the spicier the better.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
My dog.
Lifting weights. Or as I like to call it, 'intensive ferric psychotherapy.'
My brain extensions (smartphone/laptop)
Tea (Jade Oolong especially)
Just going to go ahead and list tiramisu again because it's just great.

This list is subject to change upon the event of future vexation.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
The next step on this plan of mine, how much I can't get used to working mornings, breaking things down to understand them, spending an inordinate amount of time wikipedia-hopping and learning strage new things.

How I'm going to get the dog to let me trim his nails without going totally berserker. Did I remember to take my vitamins today. What was that great idea I had last night as I was falling asleep?

How nice it'd be to have extra free time to work out with the regularity that I used to.

Why does my stupid brain only get stuck on the world's worst songs.
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
Dungeons and Dragons night with a bunch of quality people, hanging out with friends provided they're free, or lounging around like a supremely lazy and/or awesome person.

I typically find a reason to make it out to a restaurant I haven't tried yet. I don't really have a refined palate (I recognize four food groups - spicy, salty, sour, and boring), but I love trying new places out with friends.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
One of the driving passions in my life is to find the most depressing song ever written and performed. Not in an emo kind of way or anything, it just fascinates me.
Bonus points go to any song that sounds peppy but is actually about soul-crushingly depressing things.
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
You're looking for friends or something more down the road, you're upbeat or even just not senselessly negative all the time, if you enjoy beards and good conversation, if you're a baseball or football fan, if you think tacos are appropriate any time of day, or if you just want to chat. I'm a pretty amicable dude and would love to hear/hear back from you.