I am quirky, cuddly, and communicative. I would also describe myself as "sassy." If you try to hurt me or someone I love...I will metaphorically beat you up with sass. If you beat yourself up, I will wrap you in kindness (and beat your self-loathing with sass). If you try to put me in any other role, I will raise an eyebrow...with sass.
Romantically, the only type of relationship I am looking for is a monogamous one. I have been polyamorous before, but it's hard to find someone with the communication skills to pull it off. A relationship only works for me if the conditions are just right (honesty + boundaries + pre-negotiation).
And if I have a full-time monogamous boyfriend/girlfriend/transfriend, I have 2 conditions:
1) I believe in the healing power of hugs/cuddling, and I'm disappointed when others define "monogamy" as "you can only cuddle one person."
2) I need the freedom to talk openly with my friends about my sex life. I've been hurt by dating too many secretive people. This does NOT mean I post about it PUBLICLY (e.g. on facebook). My facebook stays pretty clean, due to my young nephews being "friends" on there.
I live by this quote (one I invented):
"My love is unconditional, my company is not."
You'll notice that all the websites I give you will have my real name (Esther Mathison). My main inspiration came from NaNoWriMo, which pushed me to complete a novel in a single month, which I've done for 3 of my 5 books.
I like to be in several rock bands at once, but I'm new to the area, so starting a new band (or joining an existing one) has been difficult for me. I haven't played my guitar much since I re-injured my hand but I still write piano and a capella songs for my solo project "Polyestherogen"(http://www.myspace.com/polyeg)
You can find some of my past musical projects here:
1) An improvisational jam band "Scaffolding" with an electric cellist (http://www.myspace.com/scaffolded)
2) An alternative folk acoustic duo "A Thousand Young" that I started when I was sixteen (http://akyoung.zeet.net)
3) A cinematic electronic music project called "Terran Spiral" (http://terranspiral.com)
I also used to teach singing and deep breathing classes for a state employee wellness program, but since I no longer live in Olympia, I had to pass on the torch to another choir teacher.
2. Singing. And it took me a long time to admit this. When I sang professionally, people would ask me all the time if I'm any good at singing...as if that's a normal thing to ask. Other careers aren't like that. You never hear, "So you're a doctor. Are you good at it or do a lot of your patients die?"
3. Being tolerant and respectful of other beliefs while maintaining my super-liberal-pansexual-commie-vegetarian beliefs. This is actually very hard, because soap boxes are so easy to climb upon. I'm NOT the kind of girl who will try to convert anyone to my religious or political beliefs, but I ask for the same respect in return.
4. Giving REAL hugs, not just a wimpy "I'm afraid to let anyone in my personal space" kind of hug, a full hug-you-to-your core kind of hug.
5. Conversational marathons. I was blessed/cursed with the "gift of gab." Thank goodness I know how to listen too!
My favorite bands/artists are Tori Amos, ABBA, They Might Be Giants, Molly Lewis, and JoCo. In the Steampunk genre, I like Unwoman and Dogwood
I adore cheese, especially goat cheese and hard cheeses like Dubliner. I am slowly tapering down on cheese and thankfully some of the cashew-based vegan cheeses taste pretty good. I usually don't like Indian food, but Samosas are one of my favorite foods. I also enjoy raspberry sorbet, and frozen mangoes. I have several weird allergies/sensitivities, but I'm fairly experienced at reading a menu and modifying when necessary. I've dated meat-eaters, and my policy is that they might need to brush their teeth before smooching me if their breath smells strongly of meat.
I have a strong sense of smell (some even make me nauseous) so I'll add this category.
Smells I LOVE: lavender, cheese (even pungent kinds), garlic (even garlic breath), oregano, cilantro, basil, cinnamon, coffee (though I don't drink it), cloves, ginger.
Smells I HATE: cigarettes, alcohol, marijuana, cumin, fish, strong perfume/cologne, and the laundry detergent aisle in the grocery store.
My favorite movie/TV genres are:
Fantasy/Sci-Fi: Star Trek: TNG, Red Dwarf, Firefly, Dollhouse, Wonderfalls, Pushing Daisies
Comedies: Parks and Recreation, 30 Rock, Big Bang Theory, Scrubs, IT Crowd, Princess Caraboo, The Mirror Has Two Faces, Eddie Izzard, Jim Gaffigan, Maria Bamford, Ellen Degeneres (her stand-up specials, since her talk show is kinda meh).
Indie Films: Hudsucker Proxy, Kissing Jessica Stein, Castaway on the Moon, and The Big Lebowski.
Musicals: Mamma Mia, Hello Dolly, Phantom of the Opera
And nothing compares to the loveliness of seeing a musical live.
The ultimate hybrid is "Dr Horrible's Sing-a-long Blog." I can't get enough of it! Occasionally I throw viewing parties, either for friends who haven't seen it or friends who'd love to see it again. Sometimes during viewing parties, we watch the fan-made prequel "Horrible Turn" which I highly recommend. It's freely available on youtube. And as always: Keep watching after the credits.
If you're lucky enough to be added to my facebook friends, you'll notice I also have a few fake internet wives. They have ZERO romantic interest in women, so don't overthink it.
However, I like socializing and dressing in costumes so I end up at a lot of nerdy conventions. I've been to these ones so far: Steamposium, Gearcon, Norwescon, PAX, Steamcon, Sakuracon, Rustycon, and the "Regeneration" of Anglicon (which I supported on Kickstarter.
When I'm in the mood to "geek out," these are the topics I especially enjoy discussing:
I think Jean-Luc Picard was the best Star Trek captain, Final Fantasy VI was the best console video game, and I'd love my Wii Fit board even more if it weren't so passive-aggressive.
I enjoy being an auntie for my family and a babysitter for my friends, but I am NOT interested in becoming the mother of your future offspring (and was serious enough about this decision to get my tubes tied). Also be aware that having my tubes tied doesn't mean I can skip the condoms unless I have a monogamous partner who has been tested for a variety of things.
If you have kids already, it's negotiable, especially if the kids are a lot older. But my preference would be someone without kids.
You should NOT message me if you like drinking excessively, getting high, and/or owning a gun. I'm more attracted to people who don't drink at all (a.k.a. teetotalers) because even the strong smell of booze can give me a headache. In other words, if you have even one drink, I WILL NOT SMOOCH YOU until the smell and the effects mostly wear off. So choose wisely.
Also: I prefer hearing from folks with a match rating of 70% or higher. I trust numbers. It's just the way I'm built.