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kem34

25 M New York, NY

My Details

Last Online
Online now!
Orientation
Straight
Ethnicity
White
Height
6′ 0″ (1.83m)
Body Type
Average
Diet
Strictly anything
Smokes
No
Drinks
Socially
Drugs
Never
Religion
Judaism, and laughing about it
Sign
Virgo, and it’s fun to think about
Education
Graduated from university
Job
Art / Music / Writing
Income
Relationship Status
Single
Relationship Type
Offspring
Doesn’t have kids, but might want them
Pets
Likes dogs and dislikes cats
Speaks
English (Fluently), Yiddish (Poorly)

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My self-summary
I help little old ladies cross the street.

This rye smells delicious. Anyway. Pretend I'm sitting in a leather chair and about tell you a story in the voice of Sean Connery.

My beard gets exponentially bigger every day. Maybe it's variably. I hate math.

I like to fabricate new lol-words.

I want a Yelp review about my profile.

I'm a freelance boyfriend.
What I’m doing with my life
I'm a photographer.

Hanging out with comedians because they are awesome.

I take pictures of things.
I’m really good at
Wanting to walk places over taking public transportation, clearing my plate, and taking pictures.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
I like buttered rye toast and my guilty pleasure is a block of sharp cheddar.

Music: Do you like music?

Books: Codex Seraphinianus.

TV: Currently enthralled with Bates Motel.
The six things I could never do without
- My camera
- Sriracha
- Comedians
- My phone
- Clean underwear
- The Strand Bookstore
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Why Okcupid removed my sriracha oatmeal comic from my pictures.
On a typical Friday night I am
Trying to capture a sloth to keep as a pet.
Making out with my dinner.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
- I have a man crush on Sterling Archer.
I’m looking for
  • Girls who like guys
  • Ages 25–30
  • Near me
  • Who are single
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating
You should message me if
You are artistic, able to deal with random spurts of energy, a little off the wall yourself, and have a strong desire to put hot sauce on things.

You like beards.
You enjoy bubble wrap.
Skiing is high on your skill set.
You like BBQ better than kale.
A big smile is better then a big chest.