Hi there.

What shall I say about me? Well, let us see here. I'm a ninja pirate with a viking ship and a loyal crew, and together we do pretty much nothing. That's okay, though. Most of my crew are also on other ships, much bigger ones, and if you mess with us they'll kick your ass.

I like books and painting, but not at the same time - that would be messy. I'm obsessed with LibraryThing. I spend my summers at renaissance faires. The previous two years I worked at a knitting and spinning booth there. I can both knit and spin with some level of basic proficiency. I sing badly, but play loads of Rock Band - as a singer, natch, and the game lies to me and says I sound GREAT. I am happily addicted to a myriad of video games; mostly RPGs, and notably World of Warcraft. Odds are, I don't play on your server - I have yet to meet anyone that plays on mine except family.

I enjoy the internet in a fashion, and especially appreciate that it allows me to keep in contact with friends in many disparate locations. I am an atheist, but please forgive me if I confess that I'm not interested in debate about that matter.

I do the best that I can.

Figuring it out. I'll beat this level yet. Too bad there aren't cheat codes, 'cause I hear the final boss is ridiculously difficult.

I am an in home aide to my grandmother, who has vision problems. My job slowly grows as time passes. Sometimes, I think about running from the house screaming, but some of the time I'm content. Much like most jobs, I suppose.

I have social phobia that's bad enough that I can't do any number of things that most people consider easy, like call people on the phone. I appreciate your understanding if I'm bad about getting back to you. I'm getting better, mind you, but sometimes I slip.

Also, the fact that I'm open about this does not mean I need your advice about it, nor am I interested in being psychoanalyzed or being part of your informal thesis study on the socially malformed. These have all happened already here, and I'm pretty much done with that.

People are interesting. I like talking to people online, even if I'm a bit dismal at keeping up. We can totally be friends. It might be epic, you guys. We could have a crazy friendship for the ages.

Over thinking, under thinking, and being Difficult. Sometimes all at the same time. Also, typing sentence fragments as if they were real sentences, which makes my former English teachers cry. It's okay guys, you tried your best.

I'm great at sorting. I'm excellent at dismantling things. I can even put them back together again most of the time. My favorite things to take apart are hard drives. I can destroy those in no time. Come to think of it, I am largely a force of destruction. Rebuilding is just the necessary evil that follows a good cathartic demolition.

I'm a good hand at entering books into LibraryThing. I would spend the whole of my life doing this if I could. Unfortunately, their central office is in Maine so I can't sit outside the building and stalk them until they give me a job. The thought has occurred to me, however.

I have never asked. Do most people ask such things?

I'll go with the most obvious things about me. I am short - barely 5'2". Let me tell you about how I can't reach the things on the top shelf at the grocery store. Or the kitchen. Or anywhere else.

I'm also fat. I know that conventionally I should be taking oddly angled photos of myself and trying to lie to you about it, but the facts are what they are. I'm short with an ample supply of flesh attached to my frame. If you met me, you'd notice it, and if I lied about it we'd both potentially be wasting our time. Better by far to be up front with it.

I tend to like books written in the first half of the 1900s for teenagers. I like old etiquette books, cook books, and advice tomes from the same era. I love old books about homesteading. I love books, always have, and would happily fill a whole house with them if I could. I currently own more than I should and have no plans to cease acquisitions. I do however have plans for more shelving.

I don't watch movies. There is no deep, psychological reason for this. I just don't enjoy them. I've seen a few in my time, but not a whole lot. This is unlikely to change.

I do watch television shows, though I do so mostly on my computer. Time Team, Mythbusters, This Old House, Who Do You Think You Are, Top Gear...whatever catches my eye. I am big into documentaries as well. I like to know things.

I'm fond of music. I tend to latch onto an artist (musically, not physically) and branch out from there. Moxy Fruvous, Great Big Sea, and Jonathan Coulton are heavily rotated in my space, along with Barenaked Ladies.

I am extraordinarily picky about food. It's actually probably worse for me than it is for anyone else, because when you only eat a handful of things, you get sick of them really quickly, and then what are you to do? That said, I suppose my favorite food would be a really well made sandwich. I am a big fan of Panera.

My computer setup, my dog, my friends, certain family, and bread.

How to fix the house, where I am going next, who needs what from me and when, the nebulous future, and the unchanging past.

Online. That's right. I'm the original internet loser, the ones they mock on MTV. Fuck you, MTV.

I do not play, nor have ever played, D&D or any other pen and paper RPG. I also don't LARP, nor am I involved in the SCA. Of these, I could probably be tempted by the SCA and D&D.

If at the end of this profile you feel inclined to contact me, please, feel free. I try to encourage adventures. Try new things! Meet new people! Make mistakes! Everything works out in the end.