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28 F San Diego, CA

My Details

Last Online
Yesterday – 9:42pm
5′ 7″ (1.70m)
Body Type
Strictly vegetarian
Atheism, and somewhat serious about it
Virgo, and it’s fun to think about
Dropped out of Ph.D program
Relationship Status
Relationship Type
Doesn’t have kids, but wants them
Likes dogs and has cats
English (Fluently), Spanish (Okay)

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My self-summary
* I appreciate and strive for open and honest communication and the openness to vulnerability that that requires. Emotional intelligence is crucial.
* My family is an extremely important part of my life and the majority of them live in San Diego so we see each other a lot. I'm talking aunts, uncles, cousins, grandparents...
* I'm ridiculously crafty (glass, jewelry, photography, and quilting mostly. I've also dabbled in woodworking, ceramics, welding, name it!)
* I love board and card games...a lot
* I'm a big fan of spirited debate and love to learn by being challenged
* I love camping and being in nature
* I'm a big theatre nerd and see probably 30 shows a year
* I bake a lot of super tasty things (lately a variety of cupcakes)
* I have a desire to travel anywhere and everywhere (and studied abroad in Chile in college).
* I'm crazy for music (both creating it and experiencing it live)
* I'm passionate about effecting social change and leaving this world a better place for my having been here. I also care deeply about people
What I’m doing with my life
I live in Normal Heights with my 2 stellar cats in a glorious one bedroom that should be way more expensive than it is (score!). I worked for 5.5 years in various capacities at a sexual assault and domestic violence service agency and in the Navy's sexual assault response team. Up until last year I was enrolled in a PhD program at UCSD but I quit that and the Navy job to pursue a full time position as a communications specialist for a union. It's been a big transformation and one that I'm really excited about. My work with sexual assault will continue through blogging and volunteering but I'm enjoying doing work that's a little less traumatic and emotionally taxing. I also do freelance floral design because it's good for me to use my brain creatively in the face of all that intense work. I recently started biking to work and I'm excited about exploring cycling and its physical and mental health benefits. Life is good!
I’m really good at
Creative expression. Baking. Writing/editing. Friendship. Jigsaw puzzles. Listening without judgment. Singing.
The first things people usually notice about me
The half sleeve seems to attract a lot of attention from strangers everywhere I go. And I tend to wear a lot of bright colors and have a generally quirky sense of style.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Books: Anything and everything by Tom Robbins. Also, 1984, Slaughterhouse Five, The God Delusion, Cat's Cradle, Ishmael, The Beauty Myth, Yes Means Yes, wonderfully fantastic cultural studies/socially conscious non-fiction books.

Movies: I love movies! Some that are on the top of the list: Eternal Sunshine, Lars and the Real Girl, Good Will Hunting, Adaptation, Being John Malkovich, Truman Show, Garden State, Hedwig and the Angry Inch, Grease!, Spinal Tap, Waiting for Guffman, Breakfast Club, Fight Club, Dirty Dancing (and other embarrassing movies of that variety), Clueless (which, incidentally, is one of my grandma's favorite movies).

Music: Music is always the hardest to narrow. I will listen to pretty much anything that doesn't feel oppressive sonically (not super into being screamed at or noise bands) and that doesn't have lyrics that are troubling (i.e. degrading to women, homophobic). Some favorites include: Ani DiFranco, Bon Iver, Damien Rice, Dead Prez, Ella Fitzgerald, Elliott Smith, The Finches, Fiona Apple, The Hush Sound, Imogen Heap, India.Arie, Ingrid Michaelson, Iron & Wine, Jason Mraz, Jeff Buckley, Jenny Lewis, Joni Mitchell, Jose Gonzalez, Kings of Convenience, Lauryn Hill, Loney Dear, Metric, Modest Mouse, The New Pornographers, Nina Simone, The Postal Service, Radiohead, Regina Spektor, Rilo Kiley, Simon & Garfunkel, St. Vincent, Tegan & Sara, Tom Brosseau, Wilco...I'm pretty open to anything, so please share.

Food: I'm a vegetarian but I'm not one of those ones that hates on people who eat meat. I won't cook it, but I don't mind being around it. That said, it would be awesome if you're at least vegetarian friendly because I cook some pretty rockin' food. And if you are a vegetarian, you just got instantly sexier. Favorite food of all time: bean and cheese burritos.
The six things I could never do without
1. The love and support of my friends and family
2. Creative expression
3. Physical affection
4. Bean and cheese burritos
5. Animals (most notably my super amazing cat Freddie Mercury and his new little sister Riot)
6. Intellectual Stimulation
I spend a lot of time thinking about
A lot of things! I'm a cultural studies person so my brain is constantly trying to absorb and process everything around me.
On a typical Friday night I am
Partyin', partyin' (Yeah)
Partyin', partyin' (Yeah)
Fun, fun, fun, fun
Lookin' forward to the weekend

...I'm most likely not partyin', partyin' (yeah) but I simply couldn't resist the temptation to post this Rebecca Black gem. She's right about the fun, fun, fun, fun and the lookin' forward to the weekend, though!
I’m looking for
  • Guys who like girls
  • Ages 25–40
  • Near me
  • Who are single
  • For long-term dating, short-term dating
You should message me if
I want to make it clear that I'm not on okcupid to find friends. I have a really solid community of friends. What I don't have is someone who wants to create a monogamous partnership based on passion, mutuality, and healthy communication. I don't expect you to have it all figured out, but I want you to know who you are and I want for you to be seeking a relationship not because you need to be completed but because you want to share the journey you're on with another kick-ass person who's also imperfect and working on her shit.

Message me if:
Your first reaction to reading that I am passionate about dismantling rape culture was one of enthusiasm/curiosity rather than fear/discomfort.

You want to hold my hand as we walk down the street and unexpectedly push me up against walls because you have to know what my mouth tastes like.

You are open minded and socially conscious with radical ideas about what's wrong and what we should do about it. You understand that our actions have impacts and as such we should strive to live with intention.

You are hilarious.

You would never dream of using the terms "gay" or "retarded" (or other of that ilk) to describe things you find displeasing because you understand that language is powerful. Similarly, you understand why racist jokes and those about rape/domestic violence are not ok.

You identify as a feminist (or pro-feminist or have a thoughtful reason why you don't identify as such that involves something other than a knee jerk reaction to a stereotype of what being a feminist means).

You are incredibly smart and could teach me all kinds of wonderfully interesting things that I know nothing about. Similarly, you could engage me in fascinating discussions about complex issues and ideas.

You are creative.

If you have that glorious blend of well developed radical politics mixed with levity and silliness.

If this resonates with you. Or this.