27 Nashville, TN
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My self-summary
Instagram/snapchat: laceylynwhite

Atheist. Dog momma. Beard lover. Harry Potter fanatic. Zombie junkie. Jesse Lacey enthusiast. Vodka drinker. Stiletto nail aficionado. Grammar nazi. Snow White/NCIS Abby look-alike. Makeup hoarder. Pizza/chocolate eater. Emoji user. Night owl. Self-proclaimed weirdo. Red lipstick wearer. Double-degree educated. Indiana native. Bibliophile. Empath. Kink friendly. Long term care/Rehab facility employee. Selfie taker. Road rage extraordinaire. All black errythang.

It's scary how much that actually describes me.

Hopefully you're not boring. Message me if you'd like! Seriously though, I'm not going to respond to "hi."

*Messages starting out "hey babi your so sexxi" and "lemme eat you out gurr"...... Seriously? You're embarrassing yourselves. Just stop. However, for those of you who will still think it's funny to message me with some version of the aforementioned... I can assure you that I will not think you're funny or cute, no matter how good-looking you think you are or how much money you supposedly earn. You're a disgusting, witless, unoriginal douchebag that clearly lacks a decent personality.

*yes, I did my own zombie makeup.
**no, it doesn't make me a **** for not replying to you. I'm not obligated to talk to you for reading my profile. If I don't reply, there's a reason...
What I’m doing with my life
I'm a COTA/L

That stands for Certified/Licensed Occupational Therapy Assistant.
I’m really good at
Untangling Christmas lights
The first things people usually notice about me
My eyes! And my lipstick. I wear red lipstick any chance I get.

For fuck's sake, people. Just because I like black and some other random weird shit does not make me gothic. The next time I get a "I've always wanted to fuck a goth chick" message, I will lure you into a trap, and then blast your tiny penis all over any social media I can find.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Love to read. Harry Potter and the likes. Augusten Burroughs books. Other randoms here and there.

Harry Potter movies all day, any day. Any movie with Jim Carrey in it. Batman movies. Spider-Man movies. Any National Lampoon's movie. Zombieland. Any Disney movie. If you don't like Disney, we won't get along.

The Walking Dead, Mad Men, How I Met Your Mother, Once Upon A Time, Breaking Bad, Workaholics

Favorite band ever is Brand New :)
Manchester Orchestra, Kevin Devine, Bad Books, and the likes.
The six things I could never do without
My dog, red lipstick, music, friends, my phone, and a blanket! I'm alllllways cold
I spend a lot of time thinking about
When I'll be able to sleep next.
On a typical Friday night I am
Movie night on the couch or out with friends!
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I talk to my dog as if she's human.
You should message me if
You want to? Can't guarantee that I'll reply.. 😉