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lexihaze

28 F Milwaukee, WI

My Details

Last Online
Yesterday – 10:32pm
Orientation
Straight
Ethnicity
White
Height
5′ 7″ (1.70m)
Body Type
Average
Diet
Strictly vegetarian
Smokes
When drinking
Drinks
Rarely
Drugs
Religion
Agnosticism
Sign
Taurus
Education
Dropped out of space camp
Job
Income
Relationship Status
Single
Relationship Type
Offspring
Doesn’t have kids, and doesn’t want any
Pets
Has dogs and likes cats
Speaks
English

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My self-summary
Hi everybody!
My name is Lexi.
You're probably looking at this because you like my face. Either that or I've been e-stalking you. OR maybe your cat just walked onto your laptop and clicked on my profile. Who knows.
Either way, if you're still reading this, you probably want to know a few more things about my face. Er.. me. A lot of people complain about filling these out or pretend they don't like talking about themselves (come on, I call bullshit on that) but this is really what it's all about, right? So come with me now on a journey through time and space... oh wait. Ahem. A brief and quite probably stilted summary of me, then.

If I'd call myself any one thing I guess it would be an artist. I make things, I paint, I take pictures. Once upon a time I went to art school, which I mostly loathed and eventually dropped out of, having reached my quota of pretentious bullshit. I now conduct my art activities in the privacy of my own dank basement cave studio (my Batcave, if you will), in the company of spiders who are for the most part unpretentious. They're not so great at constructive criticism, though. I think it might be a language barrier thing.
ANYWAY.
Since I dropped out of art school I'm currently working in the fourth circle of hell.. aka as a photo wench at a Walgreens. It sucks. A lot.

So I don't meet any guys in my day-to-day life, given that I work with mostly old ladies whom I adore but are just not my type. Thus, here I am on OKStupid.. um. OKCupid. Yeah, that's it.

Some thrilling side notes:
I learned how to ride a motorcycle a few summers ago because it scared the crap out of me so I had to try. My bike is a 1975 Yamaha XS650 which is currently scattered about the garage in the process of becoming one boss little bobber.
Unfortunately I witnessed a horrific motorcycle accident and am now terrified to get back on the horse. Anyone want to buy a hardtailed bobber frame?
Just kidding. Don't encourage my cowardice.

During my stint in art school, my younger brother opened my school bag to find it contained nothing but a half-drunk bottle of water and a plastic squid. I have yet to live that one down.

My sense of humor is kind of lame. I make horrible tacky word puns a lot. And then I giggle to myself. Hey, somebody has to laugh at my painfully dorky jokes. Might as well be me!

I love animals, pretty much of any kind. (Except centipedes, what business do they have, having so many damn legs? Anyway are they even animals? I digress.) Most of all I love dogs, and I get real stupid excited when I see one. They are the best.
My dog is named Kiely, and she is the sun in my sky. I'm so in love with her that it's nauseating, even to me. Just kidding. But seriously though. She's glorious. Glorious!

I'm an airport-sleeping ninja! I once spent the night on the floor of Berlin Tegel airport for no justifiable reason, poor judgement aside. It was so awful. I never thought I'd have such a close personal relationship with rubberized playground-type flooring or the nightmares that accompany said flooring. More recently I made a bed out of a luggage trolley at LaGuardia in NYC. That was actually acceptable as far as my standards for accommodations go, especially since I like mice a whole lot.
What I’m doing with my life
Trying to live as much of it as possible in my houseclothes. And by that I mean pajamas.

I have invented a new activity to accompany my love of houseclothes, which I call "Knitflix." Essentially I knit for hours upon hours while mass-consuming Netflix garbage. This can only end with my brain matter, having turned to useless goo, seeping from my ear canals. So I've got that going for me.
Also, Legos. I have rediscovered my childhood love of Legos ermahgerd. Except now that I am a grown up I have money to unwisely squander on all the expensive sets my immature heart desires!

Painting/drawing/photography'ing for shits and gigs as always.
I’m really good at
Staying up all night. Navigating subway systems. Procrastinating. Making banana bread.
The first things people usually notice about me
That I am human, female, and have all my limbs. But I'm just guessing.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
I like books. A lot. I devour books like the cookie monster does cookies. Or broccoli. Whatever he's into now-a-days. I'm usually reading at least one book at any given moment, and it honestly confuses and disconcerts me when people say things like "I haven't read a whole book since high school." Reading is ridiculously fun!
Right now I'm reading The Hunger Games. Jumpin' on that bandwagon a little late, yeah.
Some favorites: Harry Potter, Hunter Thompson, Truman Capote, Lewis Caroll.. there are lots more. To be honest I read mostly junk occasionally interspersed with some redeeming stuff.

Movies... Casablanca, Zombieland, Wristcutters, The Family Stone, Ghostbusters, Lord of the Rings, and lots of trashy guilty pleasures I'm not sure I want to publicly own up to liking.

TV. I'm Knitflixing like four hours a day of late. Short list: Wilfred, Hemlock Grove, My So-Called Life, The X-Files, Being Human, ER, Fringe, Breaking Bad, Skins.

As for music, I like the rock 'n roll. The good stuff. I'm hopelessly out of touch with music these days. It makes me feel old. But anyway, here:
Simon and Garfunkel, Tom Waits, Nirvana, Alexz Johnson, Jeff Buckley, The Clash, Tom Petty, The Rolling Stones, Brand New, Robert Johnson, Interpol, The Gaslight Anthem, Gogol Bordello, Elliott Smith, Neil Young, Social Distortion, Van Morrison, Elvises Presley and Costello, Johnny Cash, Eisley, The Ramones, Damien Rice, Th' Legendary Shack Shakers, Interpol, Elton John, Butch Walker, The Beatles, The Vandals......

If we are what we eat, I'm composed mostly of Spaghetti O's and flavor blasted Goldfish Crackers. Sad fact.
The six things I could never do without
I have more than six vital organs so I'm not really sure how to answer this question.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Escape. Living like a gypsy in an old Winnebago. Lots of useless crap that is a waste of my brain meats.
On a typical Friday night I am
Taking a long, long nap. Isn't that just going to bed? you must be wondering to yourself. No. Maybe. I suppose it could be construed as such.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
There are a few U2 songs I actually like.

That is an embarrassing secret I've never told anyone.
I’m looking for
  • Guys who like girls
  • Ages 25–40
  • Located anywhere
  • Who are single
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating
You should message me if
1. You have a fun and/or obscure fact to tell me. (Example: cats have free-floating clavicles so they can squeeze through anyplace they can fit their heads! This fact probably excludes obese cats, to be clear.)
2. You think I seem like a happening kinda chick.

Or, if you feel so inclined, I guess. I can't tell you your business, right?