I am the kind of man your mother's always hoped you'd bring home to meet her, trapped in the body of the man she's always warned you about. ;)
Having fun is one of my very favorite things to do. I also like partying, enjoying myself, and good times. If you do too perhaps we're compatible. :)
I am willing to allow a mate to warm her feet on the back of my calves or lower back in bed.
Most of my little nieces and nephews call me “Uncle The Chuckman” when they’re being good, and “Uncle The Tickle-Monster” when they want to be chased and tickled relentlessly.
I believe in three things; something, something else, and the Oxford comma.
I'm a long list of complimentary adjectives, you're a long list of complimentary adjectives, let's tell our friends that means we 'have a lot in common.' ;)
I’m a little bit old fashioned and a lot Tom Collinsed. ;)
I believe that if you don’t print on both sides of paper it’s tantamount to kicking a tree right in the nuts!
I’m not a right-winged nutjob, nor am I a left-winged nutjob. Don’t get me wrong, I’m still a nutjob, I’m just flightless. ;)
I may be the 747 of gentlemen, but I still put my pants on like everybody else, one jetlag at a time. :p
I'm so in touch with my feelings that sometimes strangers walk by and tell me to "get a room." :p
I am biodegradable, so if you care about the environment even a little bit you should totally date me. ;)
I’m not a workaholic, I just love the taste of workohol.
Napping is my second favorite holiday activity; next to sleeping of course. :p
I’m a big fan of self-deprecating humor; but I’m not very good at it. ;)
I’m an atheist, and I think God is punishing me for it. ;)
I’ve learned that it’s best to wait until at least the second date before trying the ol’ “headlock of love” on a girl. :p (“Say you’ll be my girlfriend and I’ll let you out of the headlock.”) ;)
Don’t worry, I’ve scheduled some time for us to be spontaneous from 16:02 to 16:13 hundred hours.
I have a penchant for pretentious French words.
I’m considering starting a trendy core strengthening fitness center AND coffee house combination so people can get their coffee on while taking the weight off. Naturally, it will be named “Pilattes.” ...actually, it will be one of those hybrid businesses that converts to a bar at night. In the evenings the regulars will call it “Lincoln’s” for short, but its official name is “Sore Core and Seven Beers Ago.”
I hope to someday own a discount male wig shop named "A Small Price Toupee." :p
If I ever open a headhunting agency I intend to name it “Aficionados Aficionados.”
I invented the worlds first spicy wine by dropping one of those hot green peppers into a bottle of red; I call it a "JalaPinot Noir." :D
I believe the serving size of a can of Original Pringles is “1.”
I’m a peskatarian the vast majority of the year, with the odd exception of certain “high holy-days.” (I.E. The Super-Bowl, March Madness, etc.)
I’m shallow on so many different levels that it arguably makes me deep.
I am given to excessive use of emoticons. ;) (See!) :p
I’m better at being entertaining in a group setting rather than one on one; I’m like a comedic sniper, no good at the hand to hand of perpetuating a conversation, but I can lob some really deadly jokes into the fray. :)
I believe that being intolerant of the intolerant doesn’t make you tolerant. Doesn’t make me like the intolerant either though. :/
I often can’t read my own handwriting. :/
To the best of my knowledge I made up the emoticon “:/”
I am a wave without a shore to crash upon.
If you’re going to try to get in a battle of awesomeness with me, I’ve got to be honest, I don’t like your chances. ;)
I believe there are two kinds of people in this world, and there is absolutely no difference between either of them.
I like calling people who enjoy yoga "yogurts" (despite realizing that "yogi" is the preferred nomenclature) and referring to folks who use twitter as "twits."
If I ever have a full-scale catering business that expanded from a confectionery it will be named “Revenge.” It’s motto will be: “Revenge: It’s not ‘just desserts’ anymore.” :p
I've been told by a lot of women that I'm "just not boyfriend material." I contend that I am in fact boyfriend material, they have all just chosen really hideous patterns! ...Wow, that joke was 'sew' bad. :D (Seriously though, find me another man on this site that has a sewing joke in his profile.) :p
I've also been told my loquaciousness is nothing to “verboast” about. :p
I think it’s tragic and almost unbelievable that human society has not evolved/adapted to have more words for “Love.” It’s not at all the same. There should be more words for the different kinds/iterations of love than there are Eskimo words for snow.
I’ve been told I’m a great guy and going to make “some lucky girl very happy one day,” more times than I care to tally; generally by gorgeous girls who I’m totally twitterpated with who are apparently invariably on a very ‘unlucky’ streak. :p