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27 College Point, NY Woman


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whether it would be beneficial to move in such a way

once upon a time someone sent me a message on okcupid saying he was tryna' figure out if he was a major douchebag or a minor one well you can ask god :) minor douchebags sometimes behave like major douchebags but if you're douchebaggie at all i would question what kind of peril you are in

what would a majordouchebag do? (job like me)

how do you know if you are a major douchebag

well there are these patterns

and if they frequently appear then ig uess it mightbe a sign

if you are minor douchebag you may experience similar behavior-like symptoms

but less frequently

if you are around me and continue to behave like crap be prepared to get hit

major douchebags think they know better (so do minor douchebags because both don't heed god nor ask him what would be beneficial to say before speaking and both do not ask god testing everything as they are commanded to do in his word by asking god about every single statement another person makes ie the dog shat in the yard was that entire statement of god? oh if not, was part of it of god? would it be beneficial to divide it up this way and ask if this part is of god?)

so you find them sending you crap emails with crap advice about what you ought to do with your life and shouting at you on the phone and 'giving up on you or 'not giving up on you or them telling you made the biggest mistake by changing your major or repeatedly suggesting you to pursue a career in health/medicine without any regard for the fact that you seem to lack scientific talent

you can reroute their emails to the trash

i actually interact on a frequent basis with at least a few major douchebags seemingly

major douchebags lose their their temper frequently instead of asking god whether it would be beneficial to be angry and whether it would be beneficial to react in a certain way major douchebags fly off the handle a lot and take offense EXTREMELY OFTEN ie personal offense and usually actually cause justifiable personal offenses against other people because they neither control what comes out of their mouths nor the movements of their hands

major douchebags often complain of unfairness denying any culpability including their need for mercy so actually if god enforced fairness all major douchebags an dminor ones even if they are sinless now would experience immediate death and transportation to 'hell'

a recent example: i call someone and they pick up and start denial like major douchebags don't fukin ask god what would beneficial to say so they often may go into the woe is me routine

LOOK AT ALL MY SUFFERING! (seriously? thousands upon thousands of people die from disease every day stfu plus you deserve it and worse if you've ever sinned plus if jesus never sinned and still experienced suffering then who the fuck are you to complain, don't you cause most of your suffering anyway? then go complain to yourself but don't fuckin' complain you ahve a fucking hard life ESPECIALLY TO ME and fucking expect sympathy i don't talk about what i go through on a daily fucking basis unless god tells me to) denial sigh encountering denial right out of their mouths like a pinball launched into a causeway or horses breaking from their confines

I DIDN'T DO ANYTHING THOUGH! I'vveee beeneenenenene sittting here suffering blah blah blah what fuckheads

delusional fuckheads well you're certainly it seems being a bitchass now

major douchebags get jealous and often whether it's the quantity of your lovers or ex-lovers that they complain about or you even lookin' at another person and being friendly they don't want jack shit responsibility but somehow they justify in their delusional minds that they 'deserve you for themselves or can handle that kind of responsibility or they indirectly directly call you a whore for having so many lovers just because they don't get ass as often whatever

any variation of the above

then there's the delusion they have that they are somehow more special than any other douchebag alive somehow they are 'best for you when actually their arrogance murders themselves and those around them rising every so often to attack other people for a lack of material wealth or knowledge or whatever for no valid reason

around me major douchebags suffer financial losses, physical injuries, cops on their ass, other kinds of discomfiture for the continuing of their assholish behavior so do minor douchebags and both are tested by well unhappy events including the above you know just for the sake of testing not directly or indirectly the cause it seems of their continued assholish behavior

they take statements as personal insults to them when actually god is speaking to them they also fabricate meanings and things they accuse someone else of saying instead of asking god before falsely accusing other people whether it would even be benefical to assume any thought including accusative one

douchebags do not ask god whether it would be beneficial to do something at every instant they don't understand there is a time to say something and a time to be silent job was not complaining or speaking out of turn throughout his testing ordeal he did not curse other people and curse god and sin

jesus never said anything or did anything unless god told him to through the leading of the holy spirit theirfere everything he ever did was beneficial every movement every word every seeming silence every thought

it is one thing to not sin it is another to only do that which is beneficial as jesus did

also, a reminder to everyone that you ought to get tested even if you don't have symptoms because stds can be latent ie symptom less for long periods of time

blah, do we need to review adultery and patriarchal laws


adultery is fucking who you are not supposed to fuck regardless of their marital or elationship status

adultery is having a sinning heart against god

adultery is valuing anything more than you value hearing and obeying his voice

and so this includes accusing people of adultery or

false accusation in the form of who theya re what they do in relation to god

calling them fake when who would recognise jesus unless god revealed his person to them

adultery is desiring to do anything against the voice of god and such is lust desire for evil

read your fucking bible

ah, but you see regardless of whatever kind of laws god would not command a man to be unfaithful to his wife even the pretense of relationships and marriages must be followed accordingly until they are broken by god before both parties

so though the law punishes the 'adulterous woman god punishes as he pleases and shows mercy as he pleases and apparently doesn't approve of prostitution of any kind and one can prostitute their heart to idols including false philosophies on sexuality condemning all but themselves but condemning themselves nonetheless

was it a human law or god's law that the priest ought divorce his wife even if she were not guilty of the crime of adultery smetimes it seems god records things not noting one person is better than the other or one way rather that which was practiced was recorded whatever he doth say

you know dating and marrying whom god does not tell you to date or marry is adultery

mamzers hmm jesus descended from god but seemingly was carried by a line of mamzer children born out of wedlock did not lose any rights jesus it seems was born out of a marriage and yet we scorn everyone here we who commit adultery in our scorning scorn

rabbis interpret as they wish god is just

so in conclusion adultery is having sex if god doesn't tell you to and if god tells you to then you have all the other shit in your heart to deal with if you have any or else if you don't then you're not committing any adultery at least in that instant

people scorn people for 'getting pregnant outside of marriage hmm... but mary was an exception they say no the law does not preclude children out of wedlock 'bastards are the ones supposedly that are born out of 'adulterous relationships as defined above

so children born not into or not conceived in a marital relationship retain all rights as did christ

yea, yea. but you know when i 'wasn't single i felt single as shit because when either yourself or osmeone else orboth are fukin assholes no not necessarily FUCKING assholes no fukin assholes selves-referential thennnnnn you feel single if you sense the darkness in your soul or that in osmeone else's or both get rightttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttt

if you don't heed the voice of god

holy spirit leading your every movement

including what you type

well then doesn't matter it's torturous tonight

xxo, i'm so single (in spite of being in a 'committed relationship the winds shift and it's terminated-guess i'm waitin' for somethin' in the meantime the art of love art and politics) i guess those papers will never be filed at this rate, lookin' for someone that can sing the blues like You do 'cos i'm blue through and through ain't wanna be anythang 'cept blue

johnny (sic) walker too

returning to uni in the fall to study theater continuing with the reading texts before



to witness people suffer of their own accord whether for right or wrong is strange suffering is strange as if it never belonged

a part of me does not want to observe the pitfalls of philosophies travesties so easily dismantling and deconstructed tricklings here and there of truth absconded by perseverance to the pride of thoughts that even we do not own though we might ascribe to them belongings

for then deeper and deeper we go into suffering into your suffering your point of view clarifying as if starkness could kill

and seeing reflections of ourselves our former selves even more rampantly bound

most of everything is crap it is not about demonstration of skill it is about movement of love coursing its way through things

i am not saying all artistic-scientific 'advancement is crap when rarely it is not how can anyone take credit for it

i am not proud

in every generation that is permitted to exist

people are known for their voluntary and/or involuntary deeds


proud to be alive to having beaten the odds is a strange thing

for even without god and mercy chance and circumstance happen to all we control are allowed control and yet still the work must be done through us to result in anything

in every generation

regimes topple and new ones are instated

every nation is guilty of murder of all kinds

including genocide

it orders its military off to war when it ought not go

and its members do not protest military or otherwise

and so we send ourselves off to early deaths

in the process bringing a lot of other people with us

then when all this has failed invasions begin and yet we still withhold

whatever it is we ought to give

that anything functions at all is chance or god

not any of it in its entirety can be attributed to personal diligence

some countries appear to be freer than others

and yet they do not take their duty seriously so in the end theyare far worse

morally all who have ever withheld love when it was theirs to give

are failures

i am not proud to be alive

i am not proud to be human

my creation had nothing to do with me

i am not proud to be american

i am not proud to live

but i recognise

there is duty

there always was

stat of thewrld:

opportunity cost
wash igh but we never realised

or we did butdidn't give adamn

sometimes we need to interlok with someppl to get to where we need to be in a fuller sense of a puzzle

soemtimes it's more ppl than well originally intended by god bc ppl fuk up:)

interlocking : for an advantage

an opportunity

to learn abouta different world

but not really one to reside in for too long

but even short-term

i sometimes out of reach: too heavy a cost

too great a loss

what if : it becomes

not a matter of love

or beneficiality

but a matter

of call ing space time residing



what if therein

cud be found

some kind of life

it seems

reconciling realism

with the surreal

but the surreal

looks ever so familiar dali with his angles

accent in my mind

emphasis on beyond time latch

opening: mind

what if..

out of the twenty 4 made clear seemingly

but they have different lives

and i guess to support husband is a kind of a life

but what if ... you weren't mad e to do so?

i mean what if one really is a n internationally renown dj

and the other well are also in that industry

and the most recently revealed is a journalist and musician on the side

i mean what does a life look like supporting them? it's weird..

like you get sucked into their world

but what if your worlds

don't mesh well at all i mean god can meld you but what if ..
beyond melding what if it's not the life you want .. not the life

you were made to live . then ?

i guess singleness . flings here and there don't seem .

so reconcilable. matter. anymore


who is

still with me

and may forever be

in some good eternity

*for a love

i can't forget

and a love

we never remembered:

all my

childish faults

find me now

i used to think i could

eat cake forever how

and ppl starved while i

dreamed my delusional


oh god you know

and i know nothing //

past recede into me

oh love

that you would never leave

and where

could we ever be

not here

under this moon


faraway plane

where ceasing wonder

falls away

and theres only the light fog of grey

wander across this way

to you

inside:somekindofelation some knd of free..

that no one sees

but you

and me allheavenly

dark enough for new york city's oh so kitschy kitschy tastes:

stylish enough for you

an dme :P real style


a little about being in love

is like you share a shoul with someone else

whether or not you want to harm them is still dependent on your maturity level

it amakes you fel perhaps less alone

i don't really know

i gues i have a decent time with theboys iwth or without being in love with them

maybe it's because they're in love with me i don't know

often i think eing in love with soeone is some deep


to do everything in your power to ensure their well-being

doing your tuy

but how would you ever know the right thing to do at any moment without asking god what would be beneficial to do

i don't know that's why i ask him

but it's not like the movies no not quitel ike those because still maturitiy levels vary

it must be some kind of beautiful the bride and her lover when thebride is utterly devoted and the lover utterly love

i guess glimpses are like i don't know

you're just able to do little things

become less tediouslike chores or going places i don't know if you have to be lin love

even excursions to places you both avooid most of the time but check in to see the trends

like the mall

what the hell are they selling these days

waht are we as consumers buying into

love is like being on your death bed

andnot listening to your parents blame each other

but quiet restfulness

that solitude

there's a boy who willneverfind ths unlessyoulead

there's a boyi'veneverseen

andicould never do anything no not like you do through me

love scattring gifts foryoutofind leastlikely of places on your mind

and ill stay right here in my mind for as long as you don't take mehome

strange poetry but it seems sweepin all around us though and where we've forgotten all we know that we don't know

i'll stay here til you start talkin in french past memories indents demarcations on lint coverd stays

and maybe it won't be long.. i photograph just like a girl &jerusalem was like a girl baby flailing in her blood as you walked by to save me


god is thinking about expatriating me to a country that is overall spiritually in dire straits more than the united states or un-united or un-ited states well he sends me where the fighting is fiercest like the motto goes so i'm not really surprised x

see you all in mid to late april i'lll beback now the 23rd of march but its wise to impose a quarantine i think for a while :)

our own design


i used to think i would die of loneliness and so i ran after ppl now i realise if it were the will of God for me to live he would have sustained me and sent people and/or angels to visit me and minister to my needs like he did for Jesus and now he does

and perhaps he always has even in my transgressions

and i ran after worldly things thinking they would satisfyme approval of man food clothes everything

thinking they would make man run after me and they did but for all the wrong reasons i deceived

trakkin this tonight becuz i have no fuk aclue what latino or ibiza really means;)

ALSO including under heading of sin : DO NOT i repeat DO NOT have sex with anyone God doesn't want you to if every thing you do ought to be an act of worship repent for your sins before doing anything i e get right with GOD IE PURE MOTIVES ASK GOD to refine your motives SO THATTHEY ARE 100%pure ie like Jesus' motives it is possible ppl

sin no more

so let's break it down have it broken down for us by God gonna lvel with you about me about you about everyone

we all play high stakes heavenly poker

the key is to go all in on the right hand

but how do you know what the right hand is if you do not know WHO Is right

there's this story about some person who was accused of adultery

but every one every time they sin is guilty of adultery or cheating on God who is perfect love

ok so all those years i was running away from God basically doing shit but complaining about it all the time for the most part i was a minor douchebag i wasn't going all in on what was right i pretended a lot that i was doing the right thing or trying to do the right thing but c'mon i didn't want to risk it all i was a damn pussy man being stupid and shit because it didn't make any sense i was miserable in my own sin AND everyone else's suffering so i was adding misery to misery what a dumass

anyways these days God has been revealing to me men both male and female more so on the male side because no offense but the ladies are like MIA and it has been like that since well the hebrew part of the hebrew bible ws written remember that part about how it was really hard to find a man who gave a damn about righteousness and how it was really really hard to find a woman who gave a damn? i picture my bro standing on the fukin street corner being like damn? where can i find me a decent woman? God

really see free will dictates you can choose you can choose to do the right thing at every instant HOW? with a relationship with God HIS SPIRIT will lead you and you will move WITH his spirit it's not like trying to play catch up it's like swoooooooooooooosh more than SWOOSH and that's how you move

i am a lonely shit

allow me to explain

i used to be a lonely lonely shit the first lonely being my fault because my heart was not right with God ikept sinning even though God was telling me all the time SIN NO MORE SIN NO MORE? i deceived myself into thinkin tht this is impossible and it is without God now i hear his voice and i heed it

now i feel like for the first time there' snot anythign wrong with me in the sense that there is nothing unsettling within my spirit YES i regret my past sins and i repent for them but lately i ahve not sinned for over four weeks and i know i have a high responsibility not only for myself seemingly but for many people

THUS if i sinned i would want to know immediately and repent so when HOLY SPIRIT the Spirit of God leads me to ask God if i have sinned i ask in such a way that i really want to know the truth can i HANDLE the truth? no i think if i knew the gravity and impact of my sins i would wish i were dead to some extent BUT i do want to knowif i have grieved God WHY? because God might have mercy on me and forgive me and also he might not take away my responsibility

WHY is my responsibility important? because i am entrusted with the care to feed the sheep and there are very few very very few who give a damn enough about people so those who receive this responsibility better give a damn because there is so much suffering in this world

IN FACT everyone ought to give a damn they ought not to contribute to suffering in an EVIL Way rather they ought to do what is right no matter what the cost

i live a lonely ass shit life

this is in part because a lot of people don't want to be quality ppl and pull their weight ie if you don't give a damn about love IE you don't give a damn about doing the right thing HOW THE FUCK are you going to get closer to anyone including lvoing yourself tehwayyou were made to be?

since most ppl in the world really don't give a damn i spend most of my time with the few that kinda give a damn btu dont really and then the littlest time sadly with the ppl that do maybe give a damn

then ppl be complaining about the shortage of quality ass and i be liek youall aren't so hot yourself

start with you and stop complaining there is a difference between teh two

IT STARTS with you

ok how the fuck do i fare here?

WELL since i'm lonely as shit and barely do anything but work and deal with a bunch of ppl that don't get jack shit like me but won't admit it

God took away and/or never gave me certain talents:

1) driving skills - taken away

2) geography - ie directional and placement on a map like cultural stuff associated with blah blah blah

WHY ? because lacking these skills at this season in my life (before i was a badass driver careless as shit but bad ass as in i had the talent just was not giving a damn about God or myself or other ppl back then i've paid all my tickets:)sigh was such an idiot though:P

FORCES ME in a way to interact with ppl and vice versa if they give a damn like i have to stop and ask for directions and shit and i walk around within a block-radius in nyc unti lthe fukin cops start feeling bad forme cuz i look really lost even with my map oriented THIS my dears is how God tests me

and it's sad thse days when the boys don't pass the test HOW? they don't offer to meet me sometimes GOD himself will summon tehir asses on facebook or OKCUPID and be like HEY MAN, you should chekc this girl out (ie me) and fuck her:)

i donno what GOD says to these guys but they come at me like a fukin mission is hit you not from heaven but sometimes they try to use tehir own assholish pickup lines C'mon guys if God summons you to fuck me (which can change) then don't use ur manipulative crap on me write what he tells you to write it's much hilarious and raw :)

anyways these gusy fail the fuck out and i realise perhaps it really is true (how the fuck would i know) what God says about males in america IE that most of them are major douchebags ie 80% and that even the 20% sometimes act like major douchebags

how do i know this? well if you view my page you are likely a minor douchebag or not a douchebag at all GOD IS NOT saying you are douchebag he's saying the behavior of men is wicked btu yea he made you all if you are human in his image so he wouldn't call you a douchebag with those implications you need to learn how to heed the voice of God so HE can break it down for you what he's saying

anyways so usually these guys are 'not aware perhaps they aren't or maybe they just pretend it's called DENIAL rejection of knowledge refusal of truth but wateva so the shittest my dears is whether they will meet me somewhere close to where i am to help me navigate shit

this might sound really weird but yea in fukin new york city or anyplace for that matter it's really hard for me you have no idea haha neither do i but the thing is i can get lost for hours hoursssssssssssss hahaa then you gotta find a u-turn on the fukin metro haha hourssssssssssssssss so anyways God breaks my dates with assholes that don't offer to meet me closer to like someplace simple or assholes that have the money to like if i'm living outside of the city to take a cab to meet me or take teh metro then a cab to meet me

being on the metro is like i don'tknow how to describe it or anything but for me it's liek you can sense all the ppl suffering and shit and all this crazy shit going down not a reallyy great way to start a date me on the metro by myself because well in part because it's work this is what i do on a daily basis is pray watch and pray for everyone it's not some spectator sport it's draining tiring and hard work and yes i do other shit too but seeing ppl suffer is well and it's not even the ppl in front of me God gives me visions of ppl suffering and dying all over the world some seen and unseen so essentially when a guy isn't a gentleman and doesn't really want to meet me he will treat me like shit :) but God doesn't really OH WAIT even if he does meet me he may still treat me like shit so it's like reporting for base duty i'm there for as long as God wants me to be there andi keep my mouth shut unless God tells meto say something

there's reasons for all this God uses it for my and yoru good sighanyways it's like if they don't give a damn about God enough they sure as hell don't give a damn about me so God cancels my dates accordingly God doesn't subject me to unnecessary abuse and God also knows i am willing to live and die at any moment for his glory to be revealed

anyways i had a great date last night with this guy and he passed the gentle man test and picked me up LOL sigh :)

but really america theres not that many gys outt ehre not that many decent friends LIKE REAL aSS friends male or female don't be an asshole

DID NOT JESUS clean YOUR FEET an dmore?

you all have no idea how i am being tested nor how i have been tested and the reasons for certain things in my life right now some is because it is test not only for me but for you and i hope you would come forth as goold i hope we all will


some ppl live lives of unquiet desperation because they are douchebags others live lives of unquiet desperation because they are not sadly

it's also interesting to watch God break dates with people because they don't behave like gentle men and treat ppl like shit hahaaaaaa omg all i do is watch it all go down i can't even warn them i just wait :) your actions will prove you to either be a callous idiot or a regular idiot ladidaa:) it's not even necessarily WHAT you ought to do it's more like if you if your motives are actually pure if not then don't even try haha not with me cuz my daddy in heaven ie God is not going to let me go out with you at all even if he summons you to ask me out if you fuck up there's no way i'm even leaving men are so lazy and stingy these days most men and women are in the world

oh and ps i'll never call you even if you give me your number until you pass the test what the test is is quite simple but you won't have a clue unless you really give a damn about love and if youdon't u really arebarking up the wrong tree dont waste my time

there's a reason for certain things actually a test to see whether a person is willing to serve but most ppl are really lazy so they fail sadly they live their own life by themselves and complain when they do serve and then wonder why they don't have muchof a social life dates friends whatever they choose their own stagnation anyways quality relationships start with you as a quality person and if you're not in some areas oh well then it will come out i hear it all the time with my so-called dates haha the shit they pull the shit they say and these are usually the minor douchebags of america the 20% the elite hahaa and even the elite fuck themselves over and really it gets worse when i think the date can't get worse it gets worse and they either do or say other stupid shit don't think you're such great company i report for duty pleasure is a bonus but i don't really give a damn

if you are faithful in the small gentle man things to do which God tells you but most ppl don't give a damn so they don't listen

then maybe i'll see you in person otherwise really i'm fine with my life as it is extremely lonely but really until you all become halfway-decent company i really don't give a shit

i have had the honor in mercy to have relationships with some of the most eligible men in the world

some who can't without violating privacy / won't tell me what they do for al iving

some who may or may not have been wealthy

some who may or may not have behaved properly including those who have compared my looks to a commodity that decreases in value over time

and also my ex who kicked me out of his car in teh rain because he was too busy arguing with God to notice his own callousness sigh

btu perhaps all who have ever transgressed against God has committe d the same crime to an extent perhaps not and yet lingering ly it seems i used to feel something was wrong with me when i was n't really all in and now there's not hing not a thing that really feels wrong inside other than all that wastedtime and all the love i mssed inflow and out

THINGS when i consider a life of being single:

1. if i ever will become a professional poker player

2. if i will ever publish a collection called Private Lovers: An intimate look into the lives of men <--except my lvoers are not too keen this idea i haven't taken a survey yet but i'm sure they prefer their lives of quiet desperation punctuated by flings with me

3. if i will ever become a travel writer

4. if i will ever bcome a travel photographer

5. if i can visit a country without getting ass ive managed spain thus for for three weeks hmm maybe God curbed my appetite;)

6. sigh sigh sigh

7. if i will ever have a paying job again other than president of the united states in 2024 :P hahaaaa<3

8. whether my directional skills will not be fucked with by God along with my geography skills which encompass almost everything

9. whether i will ever visit london in person oh bastion of terrible literature:P hahaaaaa<3but that's what i in part grew up on anyway most literature is terrible not that it being terrible is justifiable

10. whether i'll ever get married and have children

sigh might get to visit paris (only the airport:P) haha <3exciting nonetheless instead of watching films in french all thetime:P

sigh confessions of a wanderer

well i guess i kinda asked God to let me rather to find me an nypd cop to date or former and now i'm dating a former chicago cop which is n't quite what i was lookin for:P oh well:)))) sigh :)) ahaaaa it's cuz i spent well in part cuz i spent a lot of time in the city whilst grwing up and it wasfun to see well it was nice to see them helping little silly me with stupid shit so haha<3 i guess i have a soft spot fro them corruption and all :P sigh<3

i've got teh bluuuuuuuuuuuuuuezzzzzzzz haha<3 *ded to the popooooooooooooooooo:)haha i've also dated a guy who has been to jail so i guess i'm pretty damn impartial;) don't hate the game hate the schemin':)

haha 'best dance video i 've wandered across this year :P

'Baby's black balloon makes her fly
I almost fell into that hole in your life
And you're not thinking bout tomorrow
Cause you were the same as me
But on your knees

A thousand other boys could never reach you
How could I have been the one
I saw the world spin beneath you
And scatter like ice from the spoon
That was your womb

Coming down the world turned over
And angels fall without you there
And I go on as you get colder
Or are you someone's prayer

You know the lies they always told you
And the love you never knew
What's the things they never showed you
That swallow the light from the sun
Inside your room

Coming down the world turned over
And angels fall without you there
And I go on as you get colder
Always someone...

And there's no time left for losing
When you stand they fall
Coming down the world turned over
And angels fall without you there
And I go on as you get colder
All because I'm

Coming down the years turned over
And angels fall without you there
And I'll go on now and lead you home and
All because I'm
All because I'm
And I'll become
What you became to me'

from the idrrrrrtyyyyyy dirrrrrrtyyyyy burrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrnxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

*this describes my relationship with God

*ded to worldinGod


either be addicted to not sinning or sinning everything in between is stupidity

#andeveryone thought they were drug-freeandclean

but notreally


#because i have no steady boyfriend becuz it seems there is no male who is willing to take on the responsibility and higher accountability that comes with shit going down here and all around what fucktards

also i would like to make friends with girls but they are yousually too bitchy for that:)


to debunk the newyorkermentality:

you are better than me at everything an nothing thatisall:)

fml as deadmouse says haahaaa

so i am searching everybody to improve my winggirl stats i ain't ashamed but seriously ppl are fukinlonely as shit also thereis a goddamn shortage of high quality ass and i feel bad for my boys i mean i can't be fukin them all the time gotta share the love

it's a joke amongst close friends that i'm a slut but really when you're number's up it's time to fuck shit up:)

i.e. God picks who i fuk / get engaged to / marry so imagine this is like some amped up version of the bachelorette except no cameras or redos just me and YOU what and You hopefully <3


geton wit it beyondddddddddddddddddddddddddstylin

because all yallz proclaim to have style but aint got shit:

the above song sums up the kinda guy i'm lookin for an i've looked for him all over da world so ded to nyc

all pics taken on this dreary friday

i'll be in the city at the end of january

so i am checking out the scene the pre-apocalyptic holiday scene
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
you really don't want to knowi'd really rather be alone withyou

forgetting america tryin to forget everyone
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
anything and nothing
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
there's something different about the girl
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
say no to drugs
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
what a dumass title can i yelp?i'll use this heading and spin it around

i can rap like a mothafuka but it's not better to show it around

my skillz are way off the charts and don't give a damn bout anyone else :)
oh but i do give a dam about everyone else;)

waterworks and oh the wine sometimes it burns when it's being poured out

yea the boys mightnotice when i fly by on my heavenly high the ones that look up and ones that never sigh

on on some heavenly high they says omg or God or Jesus oh but they aint never that religious sometimes they were before they met me

but you know He the One Who Sees so darlings come come out of hiding and all the starlings

and all the lying <3

there's only one

love and without it's hell
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
how the light falls on buildings in new york city : how the light falls on you and me emanating
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
on here casing the joint

or preppin to go out like these here
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!

newark in new jersey is the first city i fell in love with ; nyc is the second

when i think of new york city i think of staying up nights in queens chilling the fuck down talking outside fenced in on sidewalks and twine and killing those roaches one at a time or the doormen that know your name and your story at least your plans for the next few weeks encouraging you to move to the city on a block not so bleak the politicians the ones you know and the names and headliners at the shows running round getting lost listening to the men call you boss i donno what it is about such a conflagration yet another place without imitation there's really nothing here to see and other than love all is greed

you run into multimillionaires on the streets but hey the humble boys when did they leave i try i try but it's never enough so here again i find my luck goddammit cigarettes burn into the soles of what i yearn for all the cafes where i grew up and pizza parlors and the gunshots and the ambulances sirens corrupt these dreams of something something perhaps a tree and something something against this sky of black and steam and there's something in me still dreaming

and the lovers stop and stare and the waiters call me here and all the dreams that i once lost and then the boys that sing and the girls that wine wait was it us complaining in some bars this time

i never ran i never paid any attention at readings or dispensation turnstile rotation

oh the literary elite the academic repletes but nothing nothing ever checked my cheek i never turned it here before i was waiting at your window drawing signs on your door and never did i open not like i ought though at such a price is mercy bought and no one understands it here the cashmere the dry cleaning the empty homes and commercial is as commercial goes but i've forgotten what it was like to hold

in this cardboard box of old and i used to dream of running away and living in this thing but on some not so dark alleyway you would find some peacefulness in this night in this perpetual sigh
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
the fuk if i kno

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