Eldest child with three siblings. From a broken home that didn't really break, just grew apart and into new homes.

If there is one thing which I'd define as the x-factor when it comes to how attractive I perceive people as being, geekiness has to factor in - not roaring "I'm a nerd! Pocket protectors all around!" but definitely a basic knowledge of pop culture and a penchant for all things sci-fi is a bonus And no, this isn't a passing fad in terms of "oh, it's so cool to be a geek." it's something I've long known about myself and quietly celebrated in the privacy of my own blog.

I'm interested in people who take an interest in something to a level that can be described as fanatical - not so keen on the obsessive/addict types. So long as you're not spending every waking hour playing WoW or going through my trash, I can take it.

I love fire.

I'm five years into a "real" relationship with a man who is my best friend and the only human I have ever encountered whose company I never tire of. We got engaged last month during a music festival while our brains were chemically aligned. Pretty sweet deal.

Professionally, my working life is more or less dissatisfying. I want to be working as a graphic designer full-time but living in a smaller town has a few drawbacks - not many jobs, and sometimes the dream jobs that you get offered turn out to be less than ideal. So I pass the time working retail in a cd/dvd/book store which has some sweet perks, and picking up freelance design work when I can get it.

I want to travel to more places than I have previously had the chance to experience but I'm scared of getting so lost, so into the world that I'll lose my sense of home which I've only just discovered and never want to be without again.

I am dressed, apprehensive, and constantly surprised

Working. Procrastinating. Ganking n00bs (not every waking hour but in the weekends sometimes). Aqua-jogging. Netball. Provoking our cat into acts of savagery. Placating our cat. Nursing my wounds.

I'm pretty good at holding up a conversation. So long as my A.D.D. doesn't kick in because then, no matter how interesting the conversation is, I'll totally just tune out and start looking at leaves or the sky or the fuzz on some random persons cheek. It's nothing personal, just a chemical imbalance and genetics.

I can train cats to stand on their back legs for treats.

Smoke rings (when the air is still).

Naming that band/actor/pop culture trivia you've had stuck on the tip of your tongue all day.

Calling it a night.

Falling in lust. The crushes I have had in my life have been epic in scale and defining in my life without ever really impacting on the object of my affections. Nurturing silent adorations in my heart is a secret skill of mine.

Conflict. I know when to avoid it and when to call you on it. There is nothing like living with a wide range of other people to train you in the gentle art of conflict. That, a new age mother, a competitive younger sibling, and a lot of repressed rage. I know emotional sparring.

Basically, I'm tall yo.

Taller than you and taller than yo' momma.

a) I'll read anything but I lean towards fantasy. True story, been reading George R. Martin after watching the HBO series of Game of Thrones. Can't wait for the final in the Patrick Rothfuss trilogy. MAN. Loved Brandon Sanderson's Way of Kings so hanging out for the sequels to that. On the recommendation of friends I read Oryx and Crake by Margaret Atwood and thought it was brilliant. Ape House by Sara Gruen was engrossing. I love Fannie Flagg, Roald Dahl, Pratchett (mainly his books about Sam Vimes), The Secret History, Brady Udall. Lots.

b) i'll watch just about anything too but some favourites: the shining. dig! leon the professional. psycho beach party. the fifth element. men who stare at goats. burn after reading. mulholland drive, battle royale, eternal sunshine of the spotless mind, donnie darko, [edward scissorhands] or anything by Tim Burton or Wes Anderson. I loved the darjeeling limited, broken flowers, toy story (probably 3 the most), what's eating gilbert grape, cry baby, fight club, the price of milk, rear window, the rules of attraction, waking life, ghost world, reservoir dogs, rejected by Don Hertzfeld, stopbus, igby goes down, virgin suicides, up, office space, 12 monkeys (cannot believe it took me so long to watch), young at heart, king of kong, miyazaki films, dirty dancing, party girl. I am fond of Harry Potter, I am fond of Pixar.

Tv shows I've gotten really into include downton abbey, bob's burgers, game of thrones, true blood, freaks and geeks, life/planet earth (bbc doco), deadwood, have started the wire, fringe... ANTM. Yeesh. Party Down is so good.

c) radiohead, nina simone, billie holliday (for those depressed days), feist, broken social scene, devendra banhart, kings of convenience, die!die!die!, ouch my face, royksopp, bjork, peaches, bloc party, dandy warhols, the shins, mars volta, bloodhound gang (only hooray for boobies though) iron and wine, tegan and sara, deerhoof, cat power, war paint, robyn, yeah yeah yeahs, arcade fire, antony and the johnsons, sigur ros, cocorosie, stars, sufjan stevens, mum, tv on the radio, beirut, justice, lawrence arabia, the sami sisters, cocosolid, the reduction agents, kurt vile, the head and the heart, papercuts, foster the people (its such good pop music that I can't help liking it), black keys, dirty projectors (bitte orca rules). Julia Deans. She is such a talented fox. Wye Oak. Little Dragon. SBTRKT. Girls.

There are many more but I'm tired so that is all for now. Computer says no.

d) All. I never have time to cook but I love food which is why I can never diet. With the exception of when I went on the liver cleansing diet with my mum for 8 weeks. It was really, really hard to give up drinking, sugar, dairy and meat for that long. I have obsessions with food where all I want to eat is that one particular food - recently I've been addicted to muesli and yoghurt, cucumbers, cream cheese and mushrooms on toast, tuna meals, chicken satay pies, scrambled eggs, sushi, chai, and watermelon.

Conversation, human interaction.

My favourites (I have favourite people - not necessarily people I'm friends with but just favourites in the crowds of people who wander around the streets of my town, drifters on websites, intersting looking kids in my classes... and my friends too of course. Ooh, and my future friends - the people I decide are so rad that I'm going to stop semi-stalker admiring them from afar, and actually befriend them)

Options

My bed

The interweb

The possibility of getting warm again.

What could have been. Lame, but true.

Social Anxiety and Phobia. It's such a fascinating problem. I mean, I consider myself to be socially anxious from time to time but the concept of being socially phobic is mindblowingly sad. Imagine how many amazing moments you'd miss out on because you were scared of how other people might perceive you through your actions.

League of Legends. Ha. Oh man, the shame.

What the fuck I'm doing with my life.

denying that there is a typical friday night while most likely watching a movie or playing a video game and drinking whiskey.

I always think people are laughing at me. Which can probably be traced back to an incident when I was 13, maybe 14, when a group of girls (who couldn't see me because I was sitting outside the school gates waiting for a lift home) came walking out of school, and one of them was doing this fucking hideous laugh and then they'd all laugh. Just before they got to the gates one of them said "Hey, do Lucinda's laugh again (that's me)" and then she did the same horrible laugh.

I was more than somewhat distraught when they rounded the corner and saw me sitting on the ground open-mouthed having obviously heard them. None of them apologised and just laughed even harder. You know, that "OMG, she like toootally heard us! how, like, tooootally hilarious!"

I think that a lot of my insecurities can be traced back to that day and having the realisation hit me that I should never take people at face value.

You want to. I don't check this often, but if you think we'd get on, go ahead.